Kindergarten and birthday parties

so DD is in Kindergarten this year and her birthday is in May. She has 23 kids in her class and there is no way i am inviting all those kids to a party. we also have a close group of friends and we have always included their kids in parties too. I'm not sure what to do this year. Last year in preschool we just invited the whole class because there were only 14 kids. What is the birthday party etiquette? I'm thinking of having a family/family friends party at home and then do something special with a small group of girls from school.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

Yes, that's exactly what I started doing for my oldest DD. We have a party early afternoon for her girlfriends, then late afternoon, we have the family party.

DD#2 is just as friendly with the boys as with the girls, so I had her pick 10 or 12 friends of any gender (in this case, I give the invitations directly to the parents myself) and we follow the same pattern as above.

Kindergarten and birthday parties

My DS turned 5 in October. We had a party for him with family and friends, we have a bunch of kids in my family.

Then for school I made the mummy juice boxes, brought cup cakes & good bags for a party with his classmates. He has 26 students in his class and its too much to invite all those kids.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

If you are not planning to invite the entire class, then PLEASE do not send the invitations in to school. That always causes lots of hurt feelings.

I'd go with inviting all the girls, (or boys) from the class.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

DS is in Pre K and I have recently had this convo with several mothers of older children.

The group opinion is you get the contact info for the kids your DC likes to play with and only invite them.

I'll see how this works next year.

Right now the Pre K does not make anyone's contact info public so I wonder if it will be the same next year.....

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

DS 5th birthday we invited just the boys. He had just started kindergarten so we figured that was the easiest. The teacher said you either invite the whole class or just the boys/girls. If you just want a couple of kids you have to mail the invites home. Hope that helps.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

I/My kids have picked a few friends from school and that was it. Sent invites home by mail. I have also did all of one sex (just the boys esp when sports and laser tag type parties). Never invited a whole class to any of my kids parties. I don't personally feel like it is necessary.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

In my area people either in vote the whole class or just the girls or just the boys. This way there are not hurt feelings.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

DS turned 5 in December. There are only 15 kids in his K class so we invited everyone and also let him pick a handful of kids from daycare since he has sppent several years with them and still spends several hours with them in the afternoon. We knew a bunch of kids wouldn't be able to go because everyone is busy around the holidays. I think we ended up with 15-2 kids.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

We have been getting a lot of evite invites the past two years. This way the parent can send reminders to those who did not RSVP. Then no school invites to worry about as well.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

Message edited 2/9/2014 7:47:06 PM.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

My son is in K. This year we are inviting the whole class, since the invitations will be sent into school. He has a winter birthday, so we can't have an outside party, which would make things a lot easier/less expensive. We are doing bowling this year, and next year when he has some more established friendships and I know the parents a little better, I would like to do an outing with 2 or 3 kids (go to the movies and for ice cream, go to the aquarium, or something like that). The cost gets to be a little much, but I agree with the sentiment of not wanting to exclude kids or cause hurt feelings at this age.

Re: Kindergarten and birthday parties

Posted by itsbabytime

Posted by Lillykat

In my area people either in vote the whole class or just the girls or just the boys. This way there are not hurt feelings.

This. In K and 1st, I have yet to attend or hear about a party that was not like this. Honestly, at this age, if you are going to invite only a few - I would only do it if it is like two kids. Kids have no sensor at this age and they do talk about it (and the parents too) and it is extremely hurtful for the kids that are not invited. My DS has a summer bday so I don't have to worry about it. My DD is in preschool and has a very large class so I invited all the girls only. I remember when my DS was in pre-k he was invited to a party that many kids were invited to but, not all. I did lunch duty a few days later and was heartbroken for the kids that were not invited and had to listen to all the other kids talk about it. One boy was even pretending he was there and I know from his mom he wasn't invited

ETA: I do feel your pain - we have a lot of family and a large group of good friends that we always invite so, with even just the girls my DD's party was 30 kids. It's a pain and $$$ but, there was no way I wanted to hurt anyone's feelings...