Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

DH originally wanted kids close together in age but I was the one who wanted a ~3 yr gap. Now I keep thinking about Baby #2. I think it would be pretty easy to convince DH.

How hard is it to have 2 under 2? Impossible? Would you recommend it or advise to wait and space the kids out a bit more?

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

I didn't think it's impossible. I think that no matter what the age difference there are always going to be things that are stressful and things that go smoothly.

I can't tell you if it's better to space them out since I only know having 2 under 2. But I loved it then and now they are 3 and 4 and are best friends. They play together all the time, my dd looks out for ds when they are on the playground together at school, it's really fun.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

I don't think there is any set answer. I know it worked well for me & I wouldn't have it any other way.

Was it hard? In the beginning yes, but then like everything else you get into a groove. The transition from 1 to 2 was much easier for me than it was from 0 to 1.

So while I love the spacing of my kids (22 months apart), I would recommend it or advise others to space their kids out because it's all based on personalities of the mom, the dad & the dc.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

mine are 19 months apart. It has its hard parts but i think any age gap has difficulties. Good luck.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

It is a totally personal decision but I knew I did not want 2 under 2....I did not want 2 in diapers (although I know there is no guarantees of how long children stay in diapers)

For us it worked out, my children will be 2.5 years apart and my dd has been trained for about 4 months now

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

I'll let you know. I'm due in Jan with Baby #2, going to be 11 months apart!

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

i can't speak for 2 under 2. i really admire the strength of those moms! mine are 25 months apart and i am only 3 wks into the game! but i will tell you that *i* think it's hard! LOL
lot harder than i imagined and my DD who is 2 is very well behaved for a toddler anyway. DS (so far) is not too high needs-but is a newborn so is high needs in that way. i spend all my days now breastfeeding on the couch and feeling bad for my 2 yr old who is busy watching Dora or playing with every toy she owns. the beginning is hard no matter what.
i think in the long run though having them close is worth it. so for that, i am willing to get through what i call the hardest days!
good luck in your decsion!

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

I had 3 within 13 months (big sister then identical twins)!

Is it hard, a bit but once you get organized its not a problem. I have never left infant mode so things are still new and fresh in my mind.

All 3 are sleeping by 7:30 and the itty bitty ones wake up at 5:30 so I am lucky.

It would scare me more to have one baby then wait 3 years for a second. For me, I would get too use to a non-bottle, non-diaper life and it would be difficult for me to get back into it.

What works for some may not work for others.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

my brother and I are 4 years apart. We're still very close though and although he tortured me as a kid, as a adults we're close.

Im pregnant with our first and im 30..so i dont want to wait all that long for DC # 2..I think waiting bet 2-3 years for me would be best..4 might be pushing it.

you can only do whats right for you, and know how you are adjusting to child # 1 to add in another one.

my neighbor is 29...she has an 8 year old, 3 year old, 1 year old (in sept) and preggers with # 4 due in Nov. I dont know how she does it b/c that would send me to the funny farm...

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Mine are 2 1/2 years apart and I really love that spacing. DS#1 is old enough that he can do a lot of stuff on his own and be a "helper" with the baby. They are still close enough in age that they will be able to be playmates as they get older.

Many of my friends did the 2 under 2 thing and, although none of them regret it, it was really hard for many of them. A 16 month old is still a baby in a lot of ways and still needs tons and tons of one-on-one attention. Personally, I would feel bad having my attention diverted from a child so young, but some people love it and it works great for them. I really felt that my son grew up so much between 18 months and 28 months that it was a good idea to wait.

If we go for a third I would like to do the same spacing again.

Message edited 8/12/2009 12:08:09 PM.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Well I have two that are the same age, and I don't find it too difficult. If we decide to have a 3rd we will wait until they are a little older so they can help out a bit. I think it would be very difficult to run after two toddlers and care for a newborn.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

For us, in the beginning it was very hard. Hard to spread yourself between a toddler and newborn, hard keeping a schedule, sleeping was non existent for me for the first 3 months.

BUT now that they are 3.5 and 2, I love it. I love that they are very close and can play together, and really love each other. They are always looking for each other, and are great friends. I love that once the youngest is done with diapers, we are done completely with that. I love that they will be together in school and can look out for each other.

With all of that said, I would not have changed anything. Even with the beginning as hard as it was, it was worth it for us.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

My kids are 22 months apart which seems good right now for several reasons

1. i am re-using a TON of stuff that has not become outdated from DS#1

2. DS#1 is walking and able to feed himself--I dont think I would be able to have 2 non-walkers

3. They are close enough that they can play together with the same toys and activities (Music class, gymboreed etc)

4. DH and I havent forgotton the newborn stage enough where it was hard to go back

we love it

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

mine are 23 months apart, and the first year was rough (made harder by Erik not being a great sleeper).

Its gotten easier now, and I love watching them play together.

My "grand" plan was to have them 2.5yrs apart - and I still think that would be a good age difference.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Message edited 8/12/2009 12:23:45 PM.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

My daughters are 23 months apart and there are good things I love about and things that are trying at times.

My 8 week old has been a wonderful challenge. She has colic and acid refulx so the constant screaming with barely any sleep has been trying. She also keeps her sister up when she has the screaming fits - since she is in pain we just have to ride it out which is hard on a toddler who has been woken out of her sleep. Thankfully the medication has helped her and the screaming is much less right now....

DH works nights and weekends which is when they both seem to need the most attention and if I spend more time with one I feel guilty about not spending more time with the other one. My 8 week old constantly wants to be held so sometimes my 2 year old fends for herself, but she plays nicely by herself when Mommy tells her she has to take care of the baby and thankfully hasn't had any major fits about that yet.

BUT, I know this will not last forever and my 8 week old is now smiling at cooing at some parts during the day. My 2 year old just adores her and I'm sure cannot imagine life at home without her Jilly My 2 year old continues to challenge me as well but I can say when it comes to the baby, all she does is kiss her and want to play with her (she even tries to share her ice cream!)

I love that they are so close in age will be the bestest of friends. And I wouldn't have it any other way

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Message edited 8/12/2009 12:55:49 PM.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

My oldest 2 are 19 months apart and it was hard in the beginning, but AWESOME now.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Posted by MrsRivera

Posted by steph4777


IMAGE

Love this!!!!!

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

My girls are 14 months apart. I absolutely love it!!! I have never found it to be hard in any way. From the moment DD#2 was born she has fit in perfect with our family. Now at 3 years old and 22 months old they are best friends (although they do fight daily). I love watching them play and interact with each other. I would already have another baby if we had more money

here is a completely unposed picture of them, I think it truly shows how much they love each other

Message edited 8/12/2009 6:34:55 PM.

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

Mine are 16 months apart- DD (second baby) was an unplanned blessing.

Here's how it was for us:

First three months- total NIGHTMARE- daily battle for pure survival.

Months 3-6- EXTREMELY hard.

Months 6-9- life was hard

Months 9-12- a little tough

Months 12 and on- totally manageable! LOVE the age difference - they fight a lot but they are BEST friends!

Re: Moms of 2 under 2 - how hard is it? Would you recommend it to others or advise to space the kids out a bit more?

i am not a 2 under 2 - dd was 2 3/4 when dd#2 arrived in june, and its a great age diff imho....she is doing well and loves being the big sister and gets "it" (well, sometimes, she did tell me that Kristina will be bigger and she will be littler soon.... )