moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Do you pick out clothes or do you let them whatever they pick out?
The reason I ask is this, I went to a kid's bday party today, few moms (around 10 or so) were talking about this and they were all saying they let their 3-4 YO pick out whatever they want to wear and they let them whatever they want to wear. I have heard this from most of DD's friends moms as well.
I know it's non of my business, I don't care what other parents do (obviously) , I'm responsible for my own kid, but I'm surprised every time I hear this. I'm a mom who does NOT do this, 99% of the time DD wears what I pick out for her and what I tell her to wear, she doesn't even argue with me , she knows better... so I told them I don't do this and they looked at me like I had 10 heads
Maybe it's the way I grew up, maybe it's a cultural thing, I'm a pretty easy going mom , but there are certain things I decide , things like there is no nail polish during school season, no fake tattoos and few other things.

Message edited 11/12/2011 10:30:15 PM.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

My girls are 4 & 5. They go shopping with me and tell me what they like.


When it comes to getting dressed daily, I tell them to pick out jeans or shorts and a long sleeve or short sleeve shirt but otherwise they pick what to wear.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

while shopping i sometimes give DD a choice if she likes something or not.
she does not pick her clothes out during the week.
on weekends if we are just doing whatever and not going anywhere important. i let her go upstairs and pick her own clothes out.
then i take pictures of what she comes up with because its usually quite interesting! we both get a kick out of it on those days!

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I give DS the option of picking his shirts some days he's only 20m

I don't mind if he grows up to be a toddler that chooses what to wear .... its just clothes, but its also part of their self expression and self esteem, how they choose to show themselves t the world, so its a little freedom I don't mind giving

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Oh, no, no! I don't do it! My daughter LOVES to dictate what she wants to wear but I only let her do it to a point, other wise she would wear her pink tutu skirt and a sparkly top every single day!

For example, I tell her she has to wear pants today (which she hates) because it's gym day at school. Then she picks out which pants she wants. If she picks something not weather appropriate, I tell her to pick again. She screams and carries on, I tell her she will get sick if she wears those and I will have to put saline nose drops up her nose. That usually ends the argument!

If it's a day with no gym and she asks to wear a dress, I always let her!

On the weekend, I give her a little more freedom with her clothes, especially if we are not going anywhere. She usually puts on her pink tutu and walks around in it all day! ;)

BTW, there is a girl in my daughter's and it took me a while to figure out why she always looks like a homeless person: she must be allowed to pick out her own clothes...

I am not judging, really. If that's what makes that family happy then G'd bless! But I know that I would NEVER be comfortable with MY child walking around looking like that...

Message edited 11/13/2011 12:38:00 AM.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

My DD is 3 and I pick out EVERY outfit she wears EVERY day. Honestly, it doesn't matter to her what I put her in, according to her EVERYTHING is cute. She's easy. I couldn't handle letting her pick out her own clothes right now and then have to dress her all mismatched and wacky. It would drive me insane! I like having her cute and coordinated every day. I'm going to enjoy the time I have now where I am able to pick out everything she wears because I know this fun is short lived.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DDs only 2 1/2 so I pretty much pick. Sometimes if I happen to be folding laundry and shes there I'll give her a choice between 2 outfits. I would let her choose in a year or so with guidelines such as pants and type of shiirt, dress or shorts.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Yesterday, my dd (4) wore pink pants with silver dots on it. With a blue top with white butterflies on it and purple socks.

Neither myself nor my dh chose this outfit. She wasn't going to school or anywhere in particular. It really doesn't bother me. She will wast what I ask her to most of the time so I give her freedom on the weekends.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I know some kids are very particular about what they wear even at an early age. Occasionally DS will voice an opinion about wanting to wear or not wear a particular shirt. I don't mind that he sometimes wants to pick out his shirt.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Posted by Hofstra26

My DD is 3 and I pick out EVERY outfit she wears EVERY day. Honestly, it doesn't matter to her what I put her in, according to her EVERYTHING is cute. She's easy. I couldn't handle letting her pick out her own clothes right now and then have to dress her all mismatched and wacky. It would drive me insane! I like having her cute and coordinated every day. I'm going to enjoy the time I have now where I am able to pick out everything she wears because I know this fun is short lived.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

My mother never let me pick out my own clothing and now I have serious problems picking out clothing for myself and very little fashion sense. So, if my daughter wants to pick out her own outfits I am going to let her do it. This is not the same as letting a child pick out what they will eat or something that will affect their health. As long as they pick out something appropriate for the weather it poses no safety issue. I think it will help them to develop a little individuality and style.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

My daughter is 2 years old going on 3. For the most part, I pick out my daughter's clothes. But, sometimes she doesn't want to wear a shirt because it's "too tight" or she prefers to wear another shirt. If it is weather appropriate, I don't care.

Last week, she wore sweat pants/ shirt with Black Patent Leather Shoes to day care! It matched, so I didn't care!

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DD is almost 4.5 & just lately she's not liking things I had bought her (on my own); so now we pick out clothes together in the store (I ask if she likes things).

For school we pick out her outfit the night before & I tell her pants or dress & let her pick. If it doesn't match I tell her (except on weekends when she can where whatever--if we have nothing special going on. Then it could be polka dot leggings with striped shirt and rainbow socks.)

DS is 2.5 & lately will only wear button down shirts; he picks his shirt every day.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Message edited 11/13/2011 8:59:54 AM.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Posted by WhatNow

BTW, there is a girl in my daughter's and it took me a while to figure out why she always looks like a homeless person: she must be allowed to pick out her own clothes...

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I'm so easy going, but there is no way my 3 yo has any say. I buy what I like and is a great price. He sometimes tries to say he wants to wear something or a different pair of shoes and I just don't pay attention. Not happening over here!

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DS is almost 4 and DD is almost 2. I pick out their clothes. Sometimes I will let them pick out part of the outfit, like they can pick the shirt and then the rest is up to me. Or at times I will pick out two complete outfits and let them pick which one. I am not a fan of wacky mismatched outfits, if I let my kids dress this way I feel like I would want them to wear a sticker that says "I dressed myself today". I feel if we are going somewhere they should look nice and put together. If we are just in the house, then I don't care what they wear but they don't really ask to pick out their clothes.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I will pull 2-3 pairs of pants and 2-3 shirts and give her the choice. This way she is happy and she matches but ultimately gets to have a say in what she wears. I have no problem if she says well I want to wear that shirt but can I wear this other pair of pants instead. As long as it matches I have no problem with that at all.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DS tries to push my buttons some times (heck all the time) when it comes to wearing clothes. I pick out two shirts and give him the option as which one he wants... It creates less of a battle. Being pregnant I really don't want to deal with the fit he'll throw... but I also don't need a hobo running around either. Sooo, I give the illusion of him "picking what he wants", but really it's my decision.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DD's 2 and both of us like to pick out her clothes. She'll pick some outfits, and I'll pick some outfits. (I usually get her clothes together for the whole week to save me time during the weekdays.) She actually does a pretty good job most of the time down to the matching shoes!

I don't fight her on her outfit unless I think she's going to be too cold or hot in what she wears. Some days she looks ridiculous, but people can tell she dressed herself. DS, on the other hand, doesn't care what he wears and lets me put him in whatever.

Message edited 11/13/2011 9:56:03 AM.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

DS (almost 2.5) picks out his shirt everyday and then I pick the pants so that it coordinates. It doesn't matter to me what shirt he picks because I bought all of them so I know I like them.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I pick out my children's clothes. Has never been an issue

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

I (or DH) dress DS every day and he is over 3. On a rare occasion he will say "not that shirt mommy" and I just grab a different one, no big deal. But other than that he just goes along with it.

Re: moms of toddler girls , maybe even boys , let me ask you something (getting dressed/outfit related)

Landon picks out his own shirt almost everyday. Doesn't matter to me either way.