Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

DS is almost 17 months (I am also 6 mths preg) and the sleeping situation is out of control and I'm pretty sure it's all my fault but nonetheless I need HELP getting this straight!

I'll give a brief history of the universe here, lol-

We started DS off in a pnp next to our bed. He stayed there for about 7 months- which was probably too long. I would often bring him into the bed in the very early morning- probably a mistake. We also rocked him to sleep every night.

Eventually it got to a point where even with this comfy arrangement he would take forever to go down. I remember sometimes dreading the evening b/c I couldn't deal.

Next we busted out the crib and started it off in our bedroom. I thought that would make some sort of easier transition. We would rock him in the living room watching cartoons I know I'm gonna get bashed for that one and you guys might as well just bring it cuz I know it's wrong. He would sleep a few hours and then wake up freaking. Back into our bed.

Around 10 months we moved the crib back into his nursery and tried CIO with moderate success. He only cried for about 10 minutes each night and then went to bed. HOWEVER he would wake up SCREAMING FREAKING OUT during the night. We intended to ignore him but just didn't. Around the same time we moved and I feel like that set us back as well. I guess our big mistake was never getting past that CIO night time wake up hump.

DH is just not on board with CIO anyway. I feel weak during it as I'm sure all of you do but without DH's support it becomes nearly impossible. Anyway, now at 17 months I think we missed the CIO boat.

Okay, o the situation now. DS NEVER gets tired. Up until the last few days this was the routine-

Wake up somewhere between 730 and 830. At 1230 I would DRIVE AROUND for an hour to an hour and a half just to force a nap. Without being forced to nap he won't get sleepy on his own untl around 4pm which means he will stay up all night. Now, even with this forced 12:30 nap he FIGHTS sleeping at night like a crazy person. We are also back to the crib in our room- ends up in our bed every single night deal.

So, the last week I tried cutting the nap out completely. The first two days it seemed to work- he got ridiculously tired around 7 and dozed off on his own.

The next few days it did not work bc he either got EXHAUSTED and took a late nap or last night idk what the heck happened- maybe he drank coffee when I wasn't looking, lol.

So to recap-
We put him to bed around 8 each night. We were doing a bath every night to try and establish a routine but it didn't seem to help and ds was getting dry skin so we went back to every other night. We were also reading books but he's at the age where he wants to rip them, bang them, and it gets him too excited so we stopped that as well. He does still have a bottle each night- basically in DH's lap with the TV on. Then if he doesn't fall asleep DH take him in our room and rocks him like a trillion times in the glider. If THAT doesnt work we ALL get in bed and he rustles around between us until he passes out. This can take hours.

I know this has been VERY long. Any advice is appreciated. I need to figure this out before DS2 comes!! I can't have a husband, a dog, and 2 children in my bed! Ahhhh. Also, I would like to put him down earlier than 8- maybe 7? I feel like my life REVOLVES around his messed up sleeping!

TIA

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH!! NO NO NO!!!!

I can see your frustration but you need to take the reigns back on this situation.. your LO (who isn't so little anymore) is totally taking control of this and you and your DH are following suit

First of all, NO TV, NO ROCKING, NO LETTING HIM IN YOUR BED..

and you need to stick to your guns.. it's all about a battle of the wills and your DC is winning..

it's NOT too late to CIO at all.. you just need to stick to it and trust me, it will stop..

another thing, why on earth are you driving around for hours to get him to go to sleep.. let him CIO and take a nap..

Your son IS tired and sounds more like he is just restless from being OVERtired..

You need to implement a routine and stick to it.. it's not going to be fun and it's not going to change overnight but you need to stop giving in..

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

First of all, no flames.

I agree with the above. It is not too late to establish good sleep routines. It will be hard and at times a struggle. But it is totally worth it. Your LO seems overtired. He seems to definitely still need a nap. I know what it's like to drive around in the hopes that a nap will come. I did this at times with my first son, who still is a horrible napper.

It's not too late for CIO, if that is what you want to do. But you have to stick to it or nothing will ever come of it. He has to learn to fall asleep on his own. If he falls asleep in a place other than his bed, he will get confused and scared, which seems to be happening to him at times. It's all about teaching him to recognize when he is tired and helping him learn how to fall asleep on his own. It's not easy but is doable.

You have to establish a routine (whatever you want it to be) and stick with it for however long it takes. Start telling him about the routine before you start it. For example, you could say to him, "Tonight when it's time for bed, we'll read 2 stories and I'll sing you some songs." Then when bedtime gets close, let him know that it's almost time for bed. Do this a few times. Then start the routine. This way he knows what is coming.

I am no sleep expert but I did have some trouble getting my son to sleep on his own in the beginning. Then around the time that DS #2 was born, he had a sleep regression. We had to do CIO with him. I HATED doing it but it worked. DS sleeps so well and is now able to tell me when he is tired (although he still refuses to nap at home). I hope this helps!

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

Thx for the replies. If we try CIO again how do you handle the middle of the night wake up(s)?

Just let them CIO again?

Those cries seem SO much worse.

Also, if anyone here is a co-sleeper-

How did you stop? CIO? B/c that's really what I am I guess although it was inadvertent, lol

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!

what helps me when i'm in a situation when it's me at the end of my rope and DH somewhere in the middle...i let DH get to the end of his rope too.

let your DH handle as much of your DS's horrible sleep issues as possible...until he gets to the point where he's like OMG we NEED to do something NOW.

17 months IMO is a little too early to cut out a nap altogether...but you never know, your DS might not need it anymore...empower yourself, read up on what you need to do, how you need to tackle the situation and get your DH on board too...good luck!

Re: Need sleeping advice for crazed no sleep 17 mth old warning LONG!