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stinger
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 4971 total posts
Name:
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Outraged!
This isnt a political post please dont move!
Why are people so quick to dismiss what Christine Blasey Ford or any other victim like her says happened to them!? Just because she waited? Our society is severely messed up. I have 2 daughters and am outraged at peoples opinions and hateful words.
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Posted 9/20/18 2:12 PM  |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Outraged!
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:21 PM |
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stinger
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 4971 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by NervousNell
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
Understand your points and absolutely innocent until proven guilty (if we can have faith in justice system). But just like we shouldnt let 1 bad cop ruin the reputation of all the good ones people should not judge and say she is lying. This is why victims dont come forward in the 1st place!
Unfortunately there are way more people actually assaulted than people who make up being assaulted.
The judgement and hatred is whats horrifying
Message edited 9/20/2018 2:32:44 PM.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:31 PM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by NervousNell
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
Not disagreeing , but so many are so quick to automatically disbelieve the woman. And given the scrutiny they face, I find it hard to believe many women would put themselves through that just for the hell of it.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:34 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by chilltocam
Posted by NervousNell
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
Not disagreeing , but so many are so quick to automatically disbelieve the woman. And given the scrutiny they face, I find it hard to believe many women would put themselves through that just for the hell of it.
No I agree with you. Both parties should be taken seriously and all accusations looked at.
I just don't automatically believe someone because they are a woman. But I don't automatically not believe them either.
Message edited 9/20/2018 2:39:09 PM.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:36 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
I do not understand why anyone would be dismissive of this woman either. I can understand why people are suspicious of the timing. He rose through the ranks without her coming forward before and now, at the pinnacle of his career, she is stepping forward. But what does she have to gain in all of this? Nothing. She is an established professor with a family. She must feel a level of responsibility to the nation to report this incident. The case needs to be thoroughly investigated and she needs to provide sworn testimony before they should proceed with their vote.
To the OP, your concern is for your girls and, as a mother of boys, I share concerns as well. One of them is a woman falsely accusing them of inappropriate behavior when they have no way to defend themselves. I am absolutely not saying she is lying, but Brett Kavanaugh has no way to prove he did not do what she is claiming. I worry that could happen to one of my boys down the line. That whole "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" can be very scary. And the other concern is adequately teaching my sons to not be disgusting, disrespectful, entitled jackasses in their teens (or ever) because it certainly CAN come to bite them in their 50's.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:47 PM |
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stinger
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 4971 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by FirstMate
I do not understand why anyone would be dismissive of this woman either. I can understand why people are suspicious of the timing. He rose through the ranks without her coming forward before and now, at the pinnacle of his career, she is stepping forward. But what does she have to gain in all of this? Nothing. She is an established professor with a family. She must feel a level of responsibility to the nation to report this incident. The case needs to be thoroughly investigated and she needs to provide sworn testimony before they should proceed with their vote.
To the OP, your concern is for your girls and, as a mother of boys, I share concerns as well. One of them is a woman falsely accusing them of inappropriate behavior when they have no way to defend themselves. I am absolutely not saying she is lying, but Brett Kavanaugh has no way to prove he did not do what she is claiming. I worry that could happen to one of my boys down the line. That whole "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" can be very scary. And the other concern is adequately teaching my sons to not be disgusting, disrespectful, entitled jackasses in their teens (or ever) because it certainly CAN come to bite them in their 50's.
Good mama!
Unfortunately the chances of my girls being assaulted (or perhaps your boys) are far greater than your boys being accused.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:51 PM |
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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by stinger
This isnt a political post please dont move!
Why are people so quick to dismiss what Christine Blasey Ford or any other victim like her says happened to them!? Just because she waited? Our society is severely messed up. I have 2 daughters and am outraged at peoples opinions and hateful words.
Agreed.
There have been studies and data analyzed about this. Yes, there have been false accusations but they show certain characteristics. NONE of those characteristics exist here. There was a really good article out there about this but I can't find it now.
Not to mention the fact that HER LIFE JUST WENT TO SHIT over all of this.
I believe her 100%.
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| Posted 9/20/18 2:54 PM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by NervousNell
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
This
People are vindictive and it's those people that discredit actual victims.
Nikki Yovino said she was raped by 2 school football players but then confessed she lied about it. Could have cost those boys their lives (Registered sex offenders, etc)
Every single accusation should be investigated. Nobody should ever be afraid to speak up.
It's our duty to teach our young men proper behavior and our young women what is and is not acceptable. It starts from childhood. It's starts from our example. I have a friend who's husband is a real winner. He treats her poorly and her sons watch this every day. I fear they will continue the cycle and it'll go on from there. I have another friend who has daughters and her husband is another winner. Her daughters see and hear everything. They see their mother accepting this type of behavior towards her so it must be ok. These friends are victims in their own marriages and have every opportunity to change things - but won't because "he doesn't really mean it" or "I provoked him, we are both to blame". And the reason they accept it? Their parents were the same way.
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| Posted 9/20/18 3:01 PM |
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MC09
arrrghhh!!!!
Member since 2/09 5674 total posts
Name:
Me speaks pirate!
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Re: Outraged!
It's strange that a man (or woman) can come forward and accuse a priest of molestation after 50 years and no one calls that person a liar and asks why they waited 50 years.
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| Posted 9/20/18 3:31 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by stinger
This isnt a political post please dont move!
Why are people so quick to dismiss what Christine Blasey Ford or any other victim like her says happened to them!? Just because she waited? Our society is severely messed up. I have 2 daughters and am outraged at peoples opinions and hateful words.
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
Honestly, we live in a society where a woman may drink too much and get raped and it's her fault but a man drinks too much and sexually assaults but it isn't his fault because he was drunk and didn't know what he was doing.
We live in a misogynist society. Women victims are always judged for how they "aided" in their own assault by what they were wearing, where they were and at what hour and what they were drinking.
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| Posted 9/20/18 3:50 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by MC09
It's strange that a man (or woman) can come forward and accuse a priest of molestation after 50 years and no one calls that person a liar and asks why they waited 50 years.
exactly!
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| Posted 9/20/18 3:51 PM |
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MarathonKnitter
HAPPY
Member since 2/07 17374 total posts
Name:
EMBRACING CHANGE
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Re: Outraged!
it's very difficult and complicated.
as the victim of sexual assault and the mother of a son... i hate this.
i was 8 and my mother blamed me. she asked me what i had done to cause a grown-ass man to hurt me sexually.
i did the same to my son... kind of.
during his senior year of high school a girl accused him. i almost killed him. then i found out that she lied because her new boyfriend was jealous that she and my son were still friends and horsed around... LIKE THEY HAD DONE FROM THE TIME THEY MET BACK IN THE FIFTH GRADE... and she expected to continue horsing around with my son after she had accused him.
ETA: i apologized PROFUSELY to my son when i found out the truth of what happened. i will NEVER doubt my son again.
i completely understand not saying anything for many, many years. i told a few family members what happened to me after about 25 years.
i saw a couple of quotes/posts in the last few days... one was: if bill cosby can be charged after so many years, why not kavanaugh. the other was: people praised the men who were raped by priests but shame the woman who was assaulted by kavanaugh. interesting perspectives.
i lean towards believing her, but i'm open to being corrected.
Message edited 9/20/2018 4:01:53 PM.
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:00 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by MC09
It's strange that a man (or woman) can come forward and accuse a priest of molestation after 50 years and no one calls that person a liar and asks why they waited 50 years.
Good point!
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:05 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by PhyllisNJoe
Posted by NervousNell
I am not speaking politically either.
I haven't even kept up with this particular story.
But you can look at it another way as well. Why do people automatically believe a woman over a man?
If I were a man right now, I'd be nervous that some woman that didn't like me, that I had words with, that maybe I dated and broke up with, that I rubbed the wrong way, whatever, would say I did something to her and everyone would just believe it with no proof.
So it can go both ways.
I feel every accusation must be investigated. Absolutely. Nobody should be dismissed.
but I also believe innocent until proven guilty
Nikki Yovino said she was raped by 2 school football players but then confessed she lied about it. Could have cost those boys their lives (Registered sex offenders, etc)
I just googled her because I didn't know the story. She is a disgrace to female-kind.
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:10 PM |
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w8andsee
LIF Adult
Member since 10/09 1193 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:19 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Outraged!
I think it's completely disgusting that they won't at least allow a full investigation. Such a disgrace.
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:21 PM |
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Jenhos
Maeve
Member since 6/05 3273 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
A few things make this hard fort his woman. 1. the timing. He has held many high profile positions in his career. Why now?
2. The letter was given back in June and was held on to. There was a vetting process. That is when this letter should have been submitted.
3. She is back peddling on the details. She now can't remember whose house it was at, when it was and anyone else except for a few that were there and they already denied knowing about it. This hurts her credibility. How do you investigate something if the victim has no facts?
4. The FBI doesn't have jurisdiction over this and the local authorities won't touch it because it is past the allowed time to report it..
5. This guy has been background checked by the FBI 6 times. These background checks are no joke. They call your family and your friends and investigate all aspects of your life.
They offered for her to come and tell her side. The offered to do it however she is comfortable (she shouldn't be made to do it on TV). She said she can't be ready for Monday. Will she be ready the day after mid-term elections with a win in Dems favor? I have a daughter and 2 sons and fear for all of them. Nobody should ever be sexually assaulted. And nobody should be falsely accused.
I find it hard to find this woman credible since she remembers no facts about when and where it happened. She said she told nobody so I don't know how you investigate it this many years later. The others she named have already denied knowing what she is talking about.
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| Posted 9/20/18 4:46 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
The problem that I have with this is that it was 36 years ago and unfortunately that is well beyond the statute of limitations in a case like this to prosecute criminally. The reason that statues of limitations exist is because it does become a matter of he said/she said and the person accused will often have a hard time putting up a solid defense because not a lot of people will remember clearly what happened 36 years ago. In this case especially there is absolutely nothing other than word of mouth. And while this is not a criminal investigation, a lot is at stake. But how can you take one person's word over another person? If no one else that was at the party that night will corroborate her story what would an investigation even discover?
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| Posted 9/20/18 5:06 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
What is different about the 2? They are both sexual assaults on children .
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| Posted 9/20/18 5:06 PM |
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w8andsee
LIF Adult
Member since 10/09 1193 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by CookiePuss
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
What is different about the 2? They are both sexual assaults on children .
Well in the case of Christine Ford, she was 15 years old and Kavanaugh was 17. She's accusing him of pushing her into a bedroom and groping her , he tried rip off her clothes and covered her mouth. She managed to run out of the room and hide, then escaped the party.
In the sexual assault cases with priests, the priest is an adult 30 - 60 years old, the child is 5 - 12 years old. The priest is performing sex acts on the child or having the child perform sex acts on him for years.
You cannot compare the 2 assaults. One is attempted rape and the other is years of sexual abuse.
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| Posted 9/20/18 5:23 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
What is different about the 2? They are both sexual assaults on children .
Well in the case of Christine Ford, she was 15 years old and Kavanaugh was 17. She's accusing him of pushing her into a bedroom and groping her , he tried rip off her clothes and covered her mouth. She managed to run out of the room and hide, then escaped the party.
In the sexual assault cases with priests, the priest is an adult 30 - 60 years old, the child is 5 - 12 years old. The priest is performing sex acts on the child or having the child perform sex acts on him for years.
You cannot compare the 2 assaults. One is attempted rape and the other is years of sexual abuse.
They are still sexual assaults. Age doesn't make one worse or better. They are both exertions of power.
Does it really make a difference that Kavanaugh was 17? Because of his age, he gets a pass at her expense? Her 15 year old self is worth less then his 17 year old self learning it's not okay to do that? How many 17 year old boys get to attempt rape or actually rape before it's not okay any more? One? two?
ETA: Forcibly touching, groping and/ or kissing are all sexual assaults or forcibly detaining someone for such is a sexual assault.
Message edited 9/20/2018 5:35:19 PM.
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| Posted 9/20/18 5:34 PM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by FirstMate
To the OP, your concern is for your girls and, as a mother of boys, I share concerns as well. One of them is a woman falsely accusing them of inappropriate behavior when they have no way to defend themselves. I am absolutely not saying she is lying, but Brett Kavanaugh has no way to prove he did not do what she is claiming. I worry that could happen to one of my boys down the line. That whole "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" can be very scary. And the other concern is adequately teaching my sons to not be disgusting, disrespectful, entitled jackasses in their teens (or ever) because it certainly CAN come to bite them in their 50's.
I think if you teach your boys the correct behavior the chances of them being accused will be slim to none. Not saying it can’t happen but it’s rare.
I will say I had a very similar situation happen to me at a party my sophomore year of high school. I never told anyone for years and to this day my family still does not know. So I completely understand why she never said a word. If the person involved in my situation was up for the highest court I would probably step forward also.
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| Posted 9/20/18 6:33 PM |
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RainyDay
LIF Adult
Member since 6/15 3990 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
What is different about the 2? They are both sexual assaults on children .
Well in the case of Christine Ford, she was 15 years old and Kavanaugh was 17. She's accusing him of pushing her into a bedroom and groping her , he tried rip off her clothes and covered her mouth. She managed to run out of the room and hide, then escaped the party.
In the sexual assault cases with priests, the priest is an adult 30 - 60 years old, the child is 5 - 12 years old. The priest is performing sex acts on the child or having the child perform sex acts on him for years.
You cannot compare the 2 assaults. One is attempted rape and the other is years of sexual abuse.
What does her age have to do with anything? Sexual assault is sexual assault. So because the men were assaulted over years they should be believed more than her because it was a one time deal?
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| Posted 9/20/18 8:03 PM |
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w8andsee
LIF Adult
Member since 10/09 1193 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outraged!
Posted by RainyDay
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Posted by w8andsee
Posted by CookiePuss
Funny how many men are coming forward and claiming sexual assault from priest and such and there none of the amount of push back that Ford is getting.
I really don't think you can compare the two. They are completely different.
What is different about the 2? They are both sexual assaults on children .
Well in the case of Christine Ford, she was 15 years old and Kavanaugh was 17. She's accusing him of pushing her into a bedroom and groping her , he tried rip off her clothes and covered her mouth. She managed to run out of the room and hide, then escaped the party.
In the sexual assault cases with priests, the priest is an adult 30 - 60 years old, the child is 5 - 12 years old. The priest is performing sex acts on the child or having the child perform sex acts on him for years.
You cannot compare the 2 assaults. One is attempted rape and the other is years of sexual abuse.
What does her age have to do with anything? Sexual assault is sexual assault. So because the men were assaulted over years they should be believed more than her because it was a one time deal?
I didn't say she shouldn't be believed and I do believe her. I just said you can't compare her assault to the assault children have endured for years from priests because the severity of the crimes in my opinion are not equal.
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| Posted 9/20/18 8:12 PM |
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