Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

BTDT moms.. can u help me out?

I've been on the fence about #2 for a few months now. My mind is constantly changing. On the bad days, it's like, oh no way can I handle another kid right now. But then I see postss like Barabara's (Joseph hiding Maddie) and it gets me thinking again.

My DD is almost 15 months, so they'll be 2 years apart, which I always thought was ideal...

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

well I had 3 siblings and DH has none, and I dont know what I would have done without having a sibling to play with, and look up to. Im the youngest and having 2 oler sisters and a brother was a blessing.\Plus I had someone to play with

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

I think there are pros & cons for both sides. I'm not an only child so I can give you the 2+ side only.

It's always tougher in the beginning but if you think about it - the beginning is 1-2 years out of their whole lifetime.

For me, I wanted a sibling for my first for when they were older. Someone to play with, someone to talk to, someone to share nursing home costs with...

I think everyone needs someone they can turn to & say "AHHH!! You know how crazy mom is!" or to lean on for support. Yes it can be close cousins but even that gets tough after awhile ("I can say something bad about my family, but you can't"). With a sibling, it's more natural.

I realize that when they grow older they may not be there for each other in the way that I hope. My mom had a falling out with her brother. When she was in her 40s, her last parent died, I overheard her telling my dad "Now I'm all alone. I'm really an orphan." I'd like to at least give them a chance at having that comraderie.

They don't always have it. They fight. They vie for time with a parent but in the end, they really do love each other.

I've seen a little 3 year old girl yell at her angry, large dad, "Don't you talk to my brother that way!" and I've seen Joseph give Maddie a hug & kiss when she was sad.

So far, so good.

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

When I think about my DD being an only child, it makes me so sad I could cry. I don't know what I would do without my brother and sister- even though they can drive you nuts on occasion. So even though I dread going through being pregnant again and raising an infant and a toddler at the same time, I will do it in a heartbeat.

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

I definitely want another kid.. but is 2 years apart too difficult?

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Mine are 17 months apart.... The first 3 months were hard. I'm finding that things are finally starting to fall into place as we all get into a routine.

I wouldn't have it any other way. It's a lot of hard work, but when you see your kids look out for one another (my 21 month old is very protective of her lil sis) - it melts your heart and makes all the craziness worth while.

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Mine are 11 months apart, and I love that they do everything together. Its like a never-ending playdate!

Ideally I wouldve like to have had them 2 years apart-like yours would be.
Its a nice space in the age where I would think it wouldnt be as crazy as I did it-mine were still babies, and it was difficult to give each the attention they needed.
Your older one being 2 yo is a little more independant, doesnt constantly need to be held-but yet, still young enough where they can play together and be into the same things. Sometimes I see friends who have kids more spaced apart, and I would think it might be more difficult bc they are at totally different stages, and cant play with the same toys&arent into the same things.
You are lucky bc if you decide to go for # 2, you got to enjoy your first and have a lot more "alone time" a lot longer than I did!
It is a lot more work w/2.....and not as easy to be spontaneous &just "run out" to do things...but of course it is worth it!

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Mine are 14 months apart, and I am only 1 month into being a mommy of 2, but I can say I wouldn't have it any other way even though we didn't plan it this way.

Gianna adores her sister, she tries to help me out, her baby sister gets more kisses than i do these days I love watching them together and I can't wait for Amelia to get a bit bigger and more interactive.

It's def twice the work though, things just take longer to do, but it's because I have 2 very little ones who need me alot.

My bro and I are 2 years apart and we grew up really close and we still are.

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

I DON'T THINK IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE IF YOU HAVE ONE OR 2 OR SO ON..I THINK IT IS A PERSONAL CHOICE ,AND YOU SOULDN,T PRESSURE YOURSELF TO JUMP SOON IF YOUR NOT READY..I KNOW ALOT OF PEOPLE ARE DOING IT ALOT FASTER TODAY..I HAVE A BROTHER,AND THAT WAS GREAT BUT MY HUSBAND IS AND ONLY CHILD AND HE IS JUST FINE..i DON'T THINK IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE..GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CHOICE

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..

I just wanted to say that I can't imagine not having a sister. I wish I had more siblings. I'm sure it was hard for my mom but I couldn't imagine my DD not having a brother or sister to grow up with and grow old with.

Re: Pros and Cons of more than 1 kid..