Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

Originally I wasn't having a shower, didn't want one. My mom said she would buy us what we needed and my MIL gave us cash to do the same. Also my aunt offered to buy our carriage. Well since I wasn't having a shower I registered just so anyone who did want to buy could choose something from there b/c I knew other aunts and siblings also wanted to buy us a bigger item that we needed.

Fast forward...after registering, we started to feel maybe we should have a shower since it was a lot more things we needed than we had imagined and we figured it would be easier that way. So that helped us to decide yes, we will have a shower.

I don't envy the position you are in. Can you register for big ticket items and get the word out so that people who do want to buy you something will know what you want and get it for you? That's what I would do if I were you.

Message edited 10/27/2008 11:27:40 PM.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

its a tough position....i just came up with a list of the more bare necessities(outside of blankets,clothes, bibs)- With the Crib being 250, & mattress & pad 100... now some people get 800 cribs and strollers... and i came up with a total of $2,000 pretax....excluding the $1,000 worth of stuff I will be getting second hand from my sister.my shower will be ALOT smaller than the one i had for my wedding and am starting to worry that we'll have to buy more stuff than originally planned....

Perhaps you can talk to your parents, and dh talk to his parents, tell them how there are alot of things that add up and you are "thinking" of having a house shower.... maybe they then will offer to purchase something needed with advance notice

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

we are having a shower.

Luckily my god mother offered to buy our glider, my mil offered to buy our furniture, my sisters are each buying something big - one of them is the godmother

and the baby's godfather already bought something big for the baby- his wife is also my best friend.

We are lucky in that department.

I will say though that there were a couple of weeks where we were nervous that no one was going to buy our furniture.. Finally, dh's mom offered.

My parents are throwing the shower and buying the rest of the big things.

we are very lucky.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

The offered. My parents have gone crazy - this is their first grandchild (well children). DH's parents have been extremely generous as well. We have gotten pretty much everything we needed we had the shower this past weekend and everyone was so generous. We have also had many baby items handed down to us. We are very fortunate to have these wonderful people in our lives.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

My mom bought us the crib, my in laws bought us the stroller, my dad a few other items....my grandmother who is BEYOND generous but is now taking care of my ill grandfather and spending a lot of they're own money on care for him hasn't said anything yet, but she is also superstitious, and I really don't want her using her money to buy anything crazy....but she did give us a nice sum of $$$$ for my birthday so I know she will, I really just don't want to take it from her and will NOT ask....

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

Can I offer a perspective from one jew to another .

I didn't have a shower. My parents an inlaws bought me the furniture for T's room - but it was a surprise to me, I didn't expect them to do that.

I did register. I made sure I had the essentials...then once I had the baby most people bought us gifts off the registry.

I am not sure if you are having a girl or boy - but if you have a bris or baby naming I am sure you will get a lot of gifts from your registry that way as well.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

I've always bought gifts for friends who didn't have showers after the baby is born. I would think that your family would do it before hand though. See if you can bring up some big purchases in conversation and gauge their reactions. Maybe they were planning on doing something but just have a different timeline in their minds.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

Posted by MrsR

Can I offer a perspective from one jew to another .


I am not sure if you are having a girl or boy - but if you have a bris or baby naming I am sure you will get a lot of gifts from your registry that way as well.

Re: Sorta Spinoff to Furniture Q- Broaching the subject of who is buying what (maybe a touchy q)

Posted by MrsR

Can I offer a perspective from one jew to another .

I didn't have a shower. My parents an inlaws bought me the furniture for T's room - but it was a surprise to me, I didn't expect them to do that.

I did register. I made sure I had the essentials...then once I had the baby most people bought us gifts off the registry.

I am not sure if you are having a girl or boy - but if you have a bris or baby naming I am sure you will get a lot of gifts from your registry that way as well.