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wannabemom
look who's freshly baked!
Member since 12/07 7364 total posts
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aka marriedinportjeff
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spin-off to first B'day party posts
Is there anyone besides us who doesn't think the first B'day warrants a huge party? Or is it the norm to make a huge blow-out in a restaurant.
I ask this becuase everyone seems to be posting today about really lavish events... and another poster who had what they described as a small party at home invited 20 people!
I envisioned Eryk's first birthday as a party with me, DH, my mom (who takes care of him daily), and maybe DH's parents.... after all, this is how my first B'day was celebrated.... I honestly can't envision my extended family and friends gathering together to celebrate a b'day party.... a baptism yes, but a b'day party, not so much....
for later B'days, I envision parties at home with little favor bags for eryk's friends, icecream cake, and a few party games...
Is this an antiquated idea, or do some parents still have very low-key celebrations? I seriously am feeling out of touch after all of these posts today!
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Posted 1/10/09 10:29 PM  |
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Tine73
Member since 3/06 22093 total posts
Name:
*********
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Different strokes for different folks..... 
I had a party at my house with about 30 ppl and entertainment and considered it small!
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:32 PM |
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My4GirlsMyLife
My 4 girlies
Member since 2/08 9702 total posts
Name:
Valerie
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
with my 1st 2 it was only dh ,me his parents and siblings and that was it ! If I had the money or a place to have a bigger party I can't say I wouldn't have but Im not one for hosting huge parties so I propably wouldn't anyway  Im not making much sense am I ? Im tired
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:33 PM |
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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Tine73
Different strokes for different folks.....
I had a party at my house with about 30 ppl and entertainment and considered it small!
Same here. But it is the parents choice.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:33 PM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Tine73
Different strokes for different folks.....
I had a party at my house with about 30 ppl and entertainment and considered it small!
I agree. It's a matter of choice and people doing what they are comfortabe with.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:38 PM |
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DmarieK
My loves!!
Member since 1/06 9203 total posts
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
I just answered in another relreated post. I'm having Rylans out somewhere ONLY because it will be to cold to have it outside and my apartment is very small. I wish I didn't have to but I really am inviting just close family and friends and it is about 50 people.
I'm not doing it at a restaurant or big hall. I'm looking for a cheap place to rent out where I can bring in food and drinks.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:38 PM |
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wannabemom
look who's freshly baked!
Member since 12/07 7364 total posts
Name:
aka marriedinportjeff
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
well, I was raised in ny but in a very european household.... so I occassionally have 'culture-shock moments' desipite being a native, if that makes any sense...
baby things (other than the baptism) are always very low-key.... (I'll define that as basically the immediate family... in our case 3-5 people?) DH was raised the same way....
I guess I'm just wondering if Eryk would feel like he missed out on something I never did, but I was raised in a different era.
Message edited 1/10/2009 10:41:58 PM.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:41 PM |
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DaniRN
Lovemykids!
Member since 5/05 1889 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Hmm-well I have had both ends!
Jenna (my 1st) her birthday is labor day weekend so for her 1st we had about 60 ppl in our yard, bbq, catered food, pinata, the works, etc...
Kyle (my 2nd) who just turned one last week was just coffe and cake inside my house with just immediate family and his Godparents who are our best friends.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:41 PM |
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mypumpkin
It's a beautiful day! :)
Member since 7/08 2296 total posts
Name:
Dee
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
I can only speak for myself and my family. I had small first b-day parties for my first two dc. Then after many years(9) and health issues I was finally blessed with another baby-so I wanted to share him with everyone and really make it a super fun day!!!
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:42 PM |
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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by mypumpkin
I can only speak for myself and my family. I had small first b-day parties for my first two dc. Then after many years(9) and health issues I was finally blessed with another baby-so I wanted to share him with everyone and really make it a super fun day!!!
And it TOTALLY was 
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:42 PM |
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MrsEvans2004
LIF Infant
Member since 8/06 314 total posts
Name:
Rina
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by DmarieK
I just answered in another relreated post. I'm having Rylans out somewhere ONLY because it will be to cold to have it outside and my apartment is very small. I wish I didn't have to but I really am inviting just close family and friends and it is about 50 people.
I'm not doing it at a restaurant or big hall. I'm looking for a cheap place to rent out where I can bring in food and drinks.
I just found a place this week my daughter birthday is on Jan 24th. I will be having it a chinese buffet they have a very nice private room, like a hall. I was going to rent a place for 300 and have the food cater but can be expensive also. So I decided to go with this place and the room is free as long as you have 35 people. The children are half price which is great. This way I don't have to worried about cooking the food because it is already prepare.
Message edited 1/10/2009 10:46:28 PM.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:44 PM |
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Tine73
Member since 3/06 22093 total posts
Name:
*********
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by wannabemom
I guess I'm just wondering if Eryk would feel like he missed out on something I never did, but I was raised in a different era.
He won't at all!!  1st b-days are more for the parents. He'll still feel loved whether you have a small party or a big party.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:44 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
I am sooooooooooooooooooooo with you
No party
No invites
No balloons
No catering or food arrangements
No special outfit that she probably wont wear later that month!
No guests (if I can help it)
There will be a cake.. but that's really for her to make a mess with. Otherwise I am hoping for just the three of us.. remembering what it was like one year earlier... just the three of us then too.
She wont remember it except for the photos we take and its just seems so unnecessary.
We'll probably have a little picinic in our backyard and maybe take her to the beach.
Again... that's just me!
To be fair.. my father (the other part of her birth story) is asking to see her early in the month of her birthday... but even then, nothing big.
The way we were raised. There was never anything big like I see here for birthdays of kids. I'm gonna be so confused and lost and totally an outcast mommy with AJ.. UGH! I wish I knew all the rules here, I feel like such an outsider sometimes.
Oh well......
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:44 PM |
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bayla
Love my two kiddos :)
Member since 8/06 7178 total posts
Name:
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by DmarieK
I'm having Rylans out somewhere ONLY because my apartment is very small. I wish I didn't have to but I really am inviting just close family and friends and it is about 50 people.
This was what we did too...We also had the same amount of people and they wouldn't fit in our condo either, so we had DS 1st b-day at a restaurant. We are raising him Jewish and didnt have a big bris for him (just immediate family) so we decided to have a bigger1st birthday party for extended family as my DH and my myself both have BIG families.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:45 PM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Tine73
Posted by wannabemom
I guess I'm just wondering if Eryk would feel like he missed out on something I never did, but I was raised in a different era.
He won't at all!! 1st b-days are more for the parents. He'll still feel loved whether you have a small party or a big party.
I agree.
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:46 PM |
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mypumpkin
It's a beautiful day! :)
Member since 7/08 2296 total posts
Name:
Dee
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by KateDevine
Posted by mypumpkin
I can only speak for myself and my family. I had small first b-day parties for my first two dc. Then after many years(9) and health issues I was finally blessed with another baby-so I wanted to share him with everyone and really make it a super fun day!!!
And it TOTALLY was
Thank you Kate!!! Now you made me cry!!! 
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:46 PM |
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wannabemom
look who's freshly baked!
Member since 12/07 7364 total posts
Name:
aka marriedinportjeff
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Tine73
Posted by wannabemom
I guess I'm just wondering if Eryk would feel like he missed out on something I never did, but I was raised in a different era.
He won't at all!! 1st b-days are more for the parents. He'll still feel loved whether you have a small party or a big party.
thanks... that I understand... what my real concern is where eryk will fall on the spectrum of american/european culture.... when someone is raised in a pretty ethnic home, you never know if they'll prefer the american culture or the foreign culture.... DH is an immigrant and I'm a 1st gen who falls 1/2 way between american and german....
Eryk will obviously be exposed to both cultures (american/european), but from experience, I know I waivered between preferring american culture (I loved those big sweet 16 parties!) and german culture (yet I chose to just go to a restaurant with 6 friends for my 16th)......
I'm wondering how engrained in modern american culture all of these giant parties are???! (many responders refer to 50 person parties as small.... our WEDDING had about 50 people... to us, it's HUGE...) if he embraces american culture, will he feel cheated if he doesn't get them, like his awkward parents 'just don't understand' KWIM?
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:52 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by wannabemom
I'm wondering how engrained in modern american culture all of these giant parties are???! (many responders refer to 50 person parties as small.... our WEDDING had about 50 people... to us, it's HUGE...) if he embraces american culture, will he feel cheated if he doesn't get them, like his awkward parents 'just don't understand' KWIM?
I am not sure its just culture by countries.. i think regions have a lot to do with it too..
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:55 PM |
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wannabemom
look who's freshly baked!
Member since 12/07 7364 total posts
Name:
aka marriedinportjeff
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Xelindrya
I am sooooooooooooooooooooo with you
No party
No invites
No balloons
No catering or food arrangements
No special outfit that she probably wont wear later that month!
No guests (if I can help it)
There will be a cake.. but that's really for her to make a mess with. Otherwise I am hoping for just the three of us.. remembering what it was like one year earlier... just the three of us then too.
She wont remember it except for the photos we take and its just seems so unnecessary.
We'll probably have a little picinic in our backyard and maybe take her to the beach.
Again... that's just me!
To be fair.. my father (the other part of her birth story) is asking to see her early in the month of her birthday... but even then, nothing big.
The way we were raised. There was never anything big like I see here for birthdays of kids. I'm gonna be so confused and lost and totally an outcast mommy with AJ.. UGH! I wish I knew all the rules here, I feel like such an outsider sometimes.
Oh well......
yep, that sums us up too! ok, we're NOT alone 
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:56 PM |
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wannabemom
look who's freshly baked!
Member since 12/07 7364 total posts
Name:
aka marriedinportjeff
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
Posted by Xelindrya
Posted by wannabemom
I'm wondering how engrained in modern american culture all of these giant parties are???! (many responders refer to 50 person parties as small.... our WEDDING had about 50 people... to us, it's HUGE...) if he embraces american culture, will he feel cheated if he doesn't get them, like his awkward parents 'just don't understand' KWIM?
I am not sure its just culture by countries.. i think regions have a lot to do with it too..
good point.... I'm a NY'er and haven't thought much about how things are done differently elsewhere in the US 
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| Posted 1/10/09 10:58 PM |
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Lillykat
going along for the ride...
Member since 5/05 16253 total posts
Name:
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
We didn't have a big party for DD - we had maybe 15 people and did a bbq. Honestly I believe that the 1st bday parties are for the parents more than the child. We put the money into taking a family vacation to WDW. We figure she wouldn't remember it but hey she certainly enjoyed it. The party on the other hand wasn't as exciting for her. In my area growing up most people do smaller more intimate 1st bday parties - and larger ones when the children are older and can remember them.
A lot of the one year old parties I went to were nice - but at a bar/restaurant and really those are for the parents more than the child.
You should do what makes you happy and not worry about whether others think you should do a large or small party.
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| Posted 1/11/09 9:29 AM |
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LIMOMx2
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Member since 5/05 24989 total posts
Name:
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
We had 30 people at our house and I do consider that small. We have a big family so it is hard to get any smaller then that. And his 2nd was also small at my parents house.
The 3rd we are only doing a kids party. I will invite the kids in his class and cousins. That's it. On his actual birthday we will just get pizza and have a cake with our immediate family.
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| Posted 1/11/09 9:32 AM |
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Rycois
Blessed with 2blue/2pink
Member since 12/05 13341 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
I'm torn on this b/c I have to do either huge (b/c of my family) or tiny - and since he doesn't have a summer birthday, it gets complicated. Otherwise, it'd be a BBQ no questions asked.
I'm leaning toward a kiddie thing in the a.m. and then just having grandparents and our immediate family over for dinner (probably catered but just to make my life easy) and cake.
DH doesn't see the need for the kiddie thing but I want to do a little something like that.
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| Posted 1/11/09 9:33 AM |
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Erica
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 11767 total posts
Name:
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
we didn't for either...just immediate family. stress free too...
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| Posted 1/11/09 9:51 AM |
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PatsBrat
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 2326 total posts
Name:
Ms. Brat
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Re: spin-off to first B'day party posts
I come from an Italian family where everything is a big to-do. I had large parties withh 100+ guests for both of my children.
That said, I have been a guest at much, much smaller parties and had a wonderful time.
In my opinion, it's not the party, but the GUESTS who make the good time, whether it be just mom and dad, or 100 of baby's closest friends and family.
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| Posted 1/11/09 10:26 AM |
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