Starting to freak out here!

My DH and I had a long talk about Grace today. We are both worried since she doesn't seem to respond to her name when called, when you tap on her on the shoulder she doesn't turn towards you, she doesn't seem to understand when you speak to her.

In all other areas she is advanced- she can crawl, do the pincher grasp very well, babbles like she should, laughs, smiles and interacts with others appropriately. We know she can hear since she still startles at loud noises. She has absolutely no stranger anxiety at all though and this worries us as well.

We are calling the ped tomorrow but I guess I am just looking for reassurance. Every where I look on the net it states that by 8 months your child should respond to their own name, be able to get objects when you ask for them- basically have a small understanding of speech that my DD just doesn't have.

We are so scared and worried.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I have no advice but just wanted to send

IF there is anything to be concerned about, and as I said I have no idea, the best thing you can do is intervene as early as possible. So, you are doing the right thing....

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I wouldnt be overly concerned at 8 months of responding to her name. Ive seen overnite changes with dd. I especially saw BIG changes between 7-9 months. Maybe its something you just need to wait out. But I do think mentioning it to your dr will ease your anxieties over this. good Luck

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I have no advice as I'm not at that stage.

It can't hurt to ask the ped. I've known cases where the parents are panicked over a delayed milestone only to bring the child into the ped's office and all of a sudden they reach it within a day or two but not without giving their parent's several grey hairs and heat palpatations

I truly hope this is the case with Grace

DS has been doing this to me lately. DD does things weeks before. It's as if he was born 4-6 weeks after her. I don't even see him trying to do something even when put in front of DD who is doing it. Just when I start to worry... "ta-dah" he does it a day or two later

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I've learned to not pay as much attention to the milestones listed in the books. I glance at them and take casual note of them but I don't stress if they haven't reached them exactly in the timeline outlined. Ask your ped, i'm sure he/she will reassure you.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I only read the books to see what they say and I don't taek it all to hear. For instance, John will be 9 months next week and it says that he should pointing out things from a book when asked but he no where near that.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

DD would do the same thing. It's what we refer to as "selective hearing" - I think she gets it from her Daddy

I want to say "don't worry", but it seems you feel kinda strongly about it. Good luck at the doc and let us know what happens!

Re: Starting to freak out here!

DS didn't respond to his name all the time. He's 4yo and still doesn't... However, at 4yo, he tells elaborate stories with subplots, reads at a 1st/2nd grade level. Don't worry too much about the milestones. They may be guidelines, but you shouldn't stress about dates. Every kid is different.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

Katie, I am PIMP because Steven inhereted the same thing from his daddy

Christine, I'm sorry you are worried. I know a few weeks ago I was worried because DS wasn't babbling at all, and now he's saying a whole bunch of words.

I really don't think there is anything to worry about just yet. Steven is 10 months and he only gets things when he feels like it. Other times he looks at me like I have 3 heads.

Good luck and keep us posted after you speak with the ped

Re: Starting to freak out here!

Thanks everyone- you gave me so much reassurance. I wasn't really worried until DH broke down crying that HE was really worried. And you know guys- that's a big deal.

I am sure it will be fine but its just one of those things. I think 12 years of working in Special Education has made me hyper sensitive to stuff too.

Thanks again

Re: Starting to freak out here!

Def talk to the doc if you are concerned but I honestly wouldn't worry too much. Like you said she is reaching all of her milestones. I don't think children at 8 months know to go get an object you name. DD is obsessed with balls and we really taught that word to her so she will go fetch for us. But sometimes I say "where is the square" and she gives me anything in site just to please me .

They are observing the whole world around them and taking so much in right now. I try to tap her on the shoulders sometimes in a sarcastic way and she doesn't turn to me either. She responds to her name most of the time but she is nosy so she is sometimes too busy looking around. And my friends DD goes to anyone. Some babies are just independent like that!

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I am sure she is FINE! We always worry about this with Christopher because we call him like 5,000 different nicknames and very rarely call him Christopher to his face.

Call the ped, but I think that he will probably say not to go so much by the milestones in books, those are averages of when things should happen.

And a few more

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I'm sure she's fine! She's still so young, and the fact that you know she can hear is a good thing. A lot of times, their brains are way too busy mastering skills we can't even see so they won't respond to things they normally would.
For instance, when Ava started to walk, she basically stopped talking. She would be silent for a few hours, which is totally unlike her. A baby's brain can't multi-task like ours yet, so it has to focus on developing one skill at a time. You'll see, she'll start to respond soon. At that age, it was hit or miss with Ava, anyway.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

FM

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I'm FMing you too....

Re: Starting to freak out here!

i just wanted to send you my

Re: Starting to freak out here!

I'm sorry you are feeling worried Christine Definitely mention it to your ped for reassurance, but I'm sure she's ok.

Hannah, who is almost 10 months, also has selective hearing. I can say Hannah a thousand times, poke her arm and nothing. Other times I'll mention her name in conversation and she'll turn and look at me. I'll sternly say no, she'll stop in her tracks, but then turn around and continue doing what I didn't want her to do. She can not point things out of a book, hand me objects that I ask for or say anything other than "dada." I just saw my ped on Friday and he said not to worry. If you know she can hear, that's what's important.

Also, Hannah goes to everyone, touches everyone, wants to hold everyone's hand and stick her fingers in your mouth. She has no FEAR. I'm worried about that for safety reasons, but not developmental ones.

So I would try not to worry, she seems quite normal to me

ETA: I think Hannah and Grace are very similar. I try to cuddle with Hannah but I just get the hand!!! She wants nothing to do with hugs and cuddles

Message edited 9/16/2007 10:27:24 PM.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

Just wanted to say thanks for all the caring FM's and just for being there and responding. I know that I may be over-reacting here but I always have worried a little bit about her since she has always been so self-reliant and not clingy. She doesn't know the meaning of the word cuddle!

But then again, neither do I- she is very much my daughter so I am trying not to worry.

Re: Starting to freak out here!

Seriously, all these milestones are driving me crazy. I always feel like I am not doing enough, or like I should have lesson plans or something!

DD will sometimes respond to her name and turn around immediately but at other times she will completely ignore me. When I say no, she stops doing whatever it is, but then resumes her activity. She is definitely not pointing things out in a book or giving me objects that I request - again I don't know if this means my daughter is behind or if this is normal behavior.

Also, my DD is in a daycare at my office building so I spend a great deal of time at the daycare just hanging out with her and I can honestly say that non of those babies are exhibiting those behaviors either.

I won't tell you not to worry b/c I know we always will, but Grace's behavior to me sounds in keeping with her age.