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MandJZ
Time for Baby #2!
Member since 8/10 4194 total posts
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M
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by Goobster
For all those who say who cares if someone is uncomfortable when seeing a BF child/mom, there is a difference. The officer felt uncomfortable but HAD to look at her to do his job and take her report. He could NOT turn his back or look away or walk away. He HAD to do a job to speak to her. He also has a right to not feel uncomfortable, but yet, he had to do his job. Should he have told her he would take her report after she was finished? Then she would have sued for not handling the situation quickly enough.
I read a comment someone else made on another site and it said, "would you go into a job interview while BF a baby?" No. There are certain situations where it's just not appropriate. Illegal, no. Appropriate, no. And personally I feel if you have to have a close and direct face to face conversation with a man who is a police officer and he asks you to cover up so you don't accuse him of staring at your breasts while he takes your report, why not just do that for the time being? Or stop BF for those few minutes. You can't expect him to just have to deal with it when it made him uncomfortable. I can easily understand a male police officer being very uncomfortable if a woman were exposed in his presence (again, a woman who is calling to make complaints against another man no less).I think the police officer had every right to be concerned with being accused of staring at a woman's breast that may be exposed to some extent, while taking her complaint. As I said all along, police officers have their jobs on the line and all this man did was try to cover his base to not be accused of something inappropriate.
But of course, this woman with her history has to sue and call the press. Not shocking I guess since I read many comments that say on her own Facebook page that she makes placenta smoothies.
I am personally glad his superior is backing him.
I encapsulated my placenta. Does that mean I'm crazy and don't deserve the protection of the law?
Again. if the officer was SO uncomfortable or nervous or whatever, he should have told her to take her time finishing feeding her baby and he would take her statement when she was ready. Period.
The fact that she has made smoothies out of placenta says literally zero about her character. But thanks for implying that anyone who chooses to reap the benefits of consuming the placenta is crazy.
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Posted 4/25/14 12:40 PM  |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
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| Posted 4/25/14 12:43 PM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MandJZ
Posted by Goobster
For all those who say who cares if someone is uncomfortable when seeing a BF child/mom, there is a difference. The officer felt uncomfortable but HAD to look at her to do his job and take her report. He could NOT turn his back or look away or walk away. He HAD to do a job to speak to her. He also has a right to not feel uncomfortable, but yet, he had to do his job. Should he have told her he would take her report after she was finished? Then she would have sued for not handling the situation quickly enough.
I read a comment someone else made on another site and it said, "would you go into a job interview while BF a baby?" No. There are certain situations where it's just not appropriate. Illegal, no. Appropriate, no. And personally I feel if you have to have a close and direct face to face conversation with a man who is a police officer and he asks you to cover up so you don't accuse him of staring at your breasts while he takes your report, why not just do that for the time being? Or stop BF for those few minutes. You can't expect him to just have to deal with it when it made him uncomfortable. I can easily understand a male police officer being very uncomfortable if a woman were exposed in his presence (again, a woman who is calling to make complaints against another man no less).I think the police officer had every right to be concerned with being accused of staring at a woman's breast that may be exposed to some extent, while taking her complaint. As I said all along, police officers have their jobs on the line and all this man did was try to cover his base to not be accused of something inappropriate.
But of course, this woman with her history has to sue and call the press. Not shocking I guess since I read many comments that say on her own Facebook page that she makes placenta smoothies.
I am personally glad his superior is backing him.
I encapsulated my placenta. Does that mean I'm crazy and don't deserve the protection of the law?
Again. if the officer was SO uncomfortable or nervous or whatever, he should have told her to take her time finishing feeding her baby and he would take her statement when she was ready. Period.
The fact that she has made smoothies out of placenta says literally zero about her character. But thanks for implying that anyone who chooses to reap the benefits of consuming the placenta is crazy.
Her actions personally have NOTHING to do with this case.
It's really PATHETIC that it's even coming into play and IMO an obvious ploy by the PD do sway public opinion of this woman.
I liken this to putting a rape victim's personal life into consideration when on trial. ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC.
I'm embarrassed to say we live in a society where women are treated this way.
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| Posted 4/25/14 12:51 PM |
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MrsA714
Baby #2 is here!
Member since 8/07 8806 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:05 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name:
Keri
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MandJZ
Again. if the officer was SO uncomfortable or nervous or whatever, he should have told her to take her time finishing feeding her baby and he would take her statement when she was ready. Period.
This I agree with wholeheartedly.
In this particular case, I just have a feeling that this woman is looking for something more than sensitivity training, but in general- I agree with you.
She should have said "No, I'm not covering up. It is within my legal right not to" and the officer should have let it go or told her he'd come back when she was done.
I have to wonder who else was around to give statements about the incident and how those statements may have led to this conclusion.
We don't know the whole story- but the dept. should've just apologized and moved on. I can see why she's pissed
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:05 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MandJZ
Posted by Goobster
For all those who say who cares if someone is uncomfortable when seeing a BF child/mom, there is a difference. The officer felt uncomfortable but HAD to look at her to do his job and take her report. He could NOT turn his back or look away or walk away. He HAD to do a job to speak to her. He also has a right to not feel uncomfortable, but yet, he had to do his job. Should he have told her he would take her report after she was finished? Then she would have sued for not handling the situation quickly enough.
I read a comment someone else made on another site and it said, "would you go into a job interview while BF a baby?" No. There are certain situations where it's just not appropriate. Illegal, no. Appropriate, no. And personally I feel if you have to have a close and direct face to face conversation with a man who is a police officer and he asks you to cover up so you don't accuse him of staring at your breasts while he takes your report, why not just do that for the time being? Or stop BF for those few minutes. You can't expect him to just have to deal with it when it made him uncomfortable. I can easily understand a male police officer being very uncomfortable if a woman were exposed in his presence (again, a woman who is calling to make complaints against another man no less).I think the police officer had every right to be concerned with being accused of staring at a woman's breast that may be exposed to some extent, while taking her complaint. As I said all along, police officers have their jobs on the line and all this man did was try to cover his base to not be accused of something inappropriate.
But of course, this woman with her history has to sue and call the press. Not shocking I guess since I read many comments that say on her own Facebook page that she makes placenta smoothies.
I am personally glad his superior is backing him.
I encapsulated my placenta. Does that mean I'm crazy and don't deserve the protection of the law?
Again. if the officer was SO uncomfortable or nervous or whatever, he should have told her to take her time finishing feeding her baby and he would take her statement when she was ready. Period.
The fact that she has made smoothies out of placenta says literally zero about her character. But thanks for implying that anyone who chooses to reap the benefits of consuming the placenta is crazy.
Years ago I would have thought people who do this were crazy. But I've since met some pretty freakin amazing women who have encapsulated and/or made placenta smoothies and I can tell you that they are far from crazy. That argument is ridiculous but not surprising coming from the source.
ETA: And I, and several other women on this site actually contributed to another LIFer getting her placenta turned into a smoothie. 
Message edited 4/25/2014 1:23:58 PM.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:20 PM |
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:20 PM |
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AngnShaun
Sisters
Member since 1/10 21015 total posts
Name:
Ang
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsA714
IMAGE
hah i saw that on FB this morning!
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:21 PM |
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cateyemm
Twins!
Member since 7/10 8027 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsA714
IMAGE
but she didnt have her diaper bag!
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:23 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by kahlua716
She should have said "No, I'm not covering up. It is within my legal right not to" and the officer should have let it go or told her he'd come back when she was done.
I wonder if she did say this and that's why he asked her to do it 3x.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:24 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsA714
IMAGE
OMG this is great!
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:24 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
You said you don't think you can argue that he was worried. That's the part I commented on, not about whether he should or should not ask her to cover up.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:35 PM |
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MandJZ
Time for Baby #2!
Member since 8/10 4194 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
You said you don't think you can argue that he was worried. That's the part I commented on, not about whether he should or should not ask her to cover up.
I absolutely think he could have been worried. I don't doubt it. I don't think he was out to shame a nursing mother. I think he didn't know better and there should be more training on how to handle this type of situation.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:36 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MandJZ
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
You said you don't think you can argue that he was worried. That's the part I commented on, not about whether he should or should not ask her to cover up.
I absolutely think he could have been worried. I don't doubt it. I don't think he was out to shame a nursing mother. I think he didn't know better and there should be more training on how to handle this type of situation.
Right - because accusing the cop of staring is a much, much different scenario than accusing a random person on the street of staring (the latter of which will get you nowhere). Encountering an exposed breast of a nursing mother is far less common than a low cut top or cleavage. It doesn't mean he's a bad person, he just didn't know what to do (assuming, without knowing, that he did not have ill intentions). I am confident that at least some will take a very valuable lesson from this and know how to act appropriately in the future.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:43 PM |
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MegZee
My bunny
Member since 5/06 8777 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
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Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
It is always appropriate to feed your child. A law exists to protect this right. A Law enforcement officer should know as such. I don't even know how people can argue this.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:44 PM |
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MegZee
My bunny
Member since 5/06 8777 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
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Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
And to add- as a cop im sure he has been in awkward position and should know how to handle himself. Uh I'm sure a bf session isn't the worst thing he has ever seen.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:47 PM |
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
You said you don't think you can argue that he was worried. That's the part I commented on, not about whether he should or should not ask her to cover up.
feeding a baby is absolutely not sexual where a cop should be concerned about something like this, while many women wear low cut tops to appear sexy, and yet a cop would never tell a woman showing cleavage to cover up.
This lack of understanding seems to be at the root of all stories where moms are told to cover up or leave while trying to feed their baby.
IMO, if the cop is SO worried about complaints being filed, he should quit his job bc any civilian he encounters could potentially file a complaint.
ETA: I would be highly offended if a cop asked me to cover up breastfeeding bc he thought I'd try to accuse him of sneaking a peek. How immature!
Message edited 4/25/2014 1:56:31 PM.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:50 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
I don't think you can argue that he was worried about being accused of staring at her breast while BFing.
Not saying it was the case or not the case in THIS instance at all, but I respectfully disagree with you. I think this is something that does cross their minds. Not all, but certainly some.
So what about low cut tops & cleavage...he could be worried about being accused of staring in that situation too, does that mean he should ask a woman showing cleavage to cover up?
You said you don't think you can argue that he was worried. That's the part I commented on, not about whether he should or should not ask her to cover up.
Well, you quoted me out of context when the very next sentence was the comparison to cleavage showing. You see the same amount of breast ... And feeding a baby is absolutely not sexual where a cop should be concerned about something like this, while many women wear low cut tops to appear sexy, and yet a cop would never tell a woman showing cleavage to cover up.
This lack of understanding seems to be at the root of all stories where moms are told to cover up or leave while trying to feed their baby.
IMO, if the cop is SO worried about complaints being filed, he should quit his job bc any civilian he encounters could potentially file a complaint.
I'm sorry that I misunderstood what you were saying. I thought you were voicing your opinion as to whether he could have legitimately been worried about someone accusing him of staring. I did not realize it was not a sentiment independent of the rest of your opinion.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:52 PM |
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by Bearcat
I'm sorry that I misunderstood what you were saying. I thought you were voicing your opinion as to whether he could have legitimately been worried about someone accusing him of staring. I did not realize it was not a sentiment independent of the rest of your opinion.
I went back and edited my last post bc I did misunderstand what you were responding too, and I think we can agree to disagree, as you said.
Message edited 4/25/2014 1:59:21 PM.
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| Posted 4/25/14 1:58 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by MrsDamonSalv7319
Posted by Bearcat
I'm sorry that I misunderstood what you were saying. I thought you were voicing your opinion as to whether he could have legitimately been worried about someone accusing him of staring. I did not realize it was not a sentiment independent of the rest of your opinion.
I went back and edited my last post bc I did misunderstand what you were responding too, and I think we can agree to disagree, as you said.
Gotcha, fair enough! 
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| Posted 4/25/14 2:17 PM |
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meloyellow
LIF Adult
Member since 3/13 1843 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
the best part of this whole topic is that nobodies opinions on the issue really matter...it's a law, she is protected by that law.
Also, she was in HER car...HER property...not that it should matter.
Message edited 4/25/2014 2:48:47 PM.
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| Posted 4/25/14 2:44 PM |
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meloyellow
LIF Adult
Member since 3/13 1843 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by HoneyBadger
Posted by MandJZ
Posted by Goobster
For all those who say who cares if someone is uncomfortable when seeing a BF child/mom, there is a difference. The officer felt uncomfortable but HAD to look at her to do his job and take her report. He could NOT turn his back or look away or walk away. He HAD to do a job to speak to her. He also has a right to not feel uncomfortable, but yet, he had to do his job. Should he have told her he would take her report after she was finished? Then she would have sued for not handling the situation quickly enough.
I read a comment someone else made on another site and it said, "would you go into a job interview while BF a baby?" No. There are certain situations where it's just not appropriate. Illegal, no. Appropriate, no. And personally I feel if you have to have a close and direct face to face conversation with a man who is a police officer and he asks you to cover up so you don't accuse him of staring at your breasts while he takes your report, why not just do that for the time being? Or stop BF for those few minutes. You can't expect him to just have to deal with it when it made him uncomfortable. I can easily understand a male police officer being very uncomfortable if a woman were exposed in his presence (again, a woman who is calling to make complaints against another man no less).I think the police officer had every right to be concerned with being accused of staring at a woman's breast that may be exposed to some extent, while taking her complaint. As I said all along, police officers have their jobs on the line and all this man did was try to cover his base to not be accused of something inappropriate.
But of course, this woman with her history has to sue and call the press. Not shocking I guess since I read many comments that say on her own Facebook page that she makes placenta smoothies.
I am personally glad his superior is backing him.
I encapsulated my placenta. Does that mean I'm crazy and don't deserve the protection of the law?
Again. if the officer was SO uncomfortable or nervous or whatever, he should have told her to take her time finishing feeding her baby and he would take her statement when she was ready. Period.
The fact that she has made smoothies out of placenta says literally zero about her character. But thanks for implying that anyone who chooses to reap the benefits of consuming the placenta is crazy.
Her actions personally have NOTHING to do with this case.
It's really PATHETIC that it's even coming into play and IMO an obvious ploy by the PD do sway public opinion of this woman.
I liken this to putting a rape victim's personal life into consideration when on trial. ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC.
I'm embarrassed to say we live in a society where women are treated this way.
It's extremely ignorant that it's even a topic of discussion in regards to this matter.
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| Posted 4/25/14 2:48 PM |
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seaside
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 3101 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
I am incensed that anyone could argue that e could legitimately defend himself by saying he feared being accused of staring.
This is like when male executives refuse to mentor women the way they do with men or sit alone in a room with junior women because they are afraid of "being accused of something."
It's immature bs and it has real effects on people's lives, careers, and advancement.
It reminds me of the obtuse male gym teacher in "Mean Girls" who taught sex ed and told all the girls they'd get pregnant and die.
Come on. Has any cop EVER been disciplined for "staring" at a woman giving a complaint where 1) there was no allegation that he said or actually did anything inappropriate, and 2) another cop was there to witness it?
Or maybe she could make up things he said too. Maybe he should really protect himself well and never put himself alone with any woman while on duty. It's all brilliant, & not at all sexist. 
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| Posted 4/25/14 2:53 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
It makes me sad that breastfeeding in this day and age makes people uncomfortable.
I am honestly flabbergasted by this. It is exactly what our bodies were designed to do.
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| Posted 4/25/14 3:02 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Suffolk mom files complaint over public breastfeeding
Posted by seaside
I am incensed that anyone could argue that e could legitimately defend himself by saying he feared being accused of staring.
Incase you're referring to me, that's not what I said. I said the fear of accusation is a legitimate fear. Not that such a fear justifies how he handled the situation. I think if he did feel afraid of being accused of staring, he should have asked the woman to let him know when she was finished, or something to that effect. This wasn't an emergency situation where he had to act immediately.
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| Posted 4/25/14 3:09 PM |
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