| Posted By |
Message |
| Pages: [1] 2 |
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
BIG fight
DH and I just got into another BIG fight
hew feels that he is not being appreciated / and or respected enough
He got me a NEW car for our wedding
that I just got into MY 1st accident ever in
we had the car for 6 months
WE also got a new fridge (stainless steal) that our daughter accendtly put a scratch into ( we had that for over 1 year)
SO with all of this combined with in a week he had blown his top
SO yesterday he had to go to the city we have 1 car now because the other on is getting fixed...SO I drooped him off at the train station and had to pick him up
well he got out early got an early train
I got out 10-15 min later and he blew his top because he had to watie out in the cold
and way my question is
HOW can me and our daughter make him feel better
what can we do every now and then to make him feel appreciated???
MInd you some times I feel the same way...I Come home to a sink full of dishes...1/2 eaten cake still on the plate ect.....
sorry so long I just needed to vent a little and get some advice
Message edited 12/29/2006 1:29:55 PM.
|
Posted 12/29/06 12:05 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
curliegirl
He's here!!!!
Member since 3/06 10128 total posts
Name:
Gina
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Sounds like you need to spend some QT just relaxing and enjoying each other's company.....
To me, life is all about dodging the curveballs and learning to deal with the blows that just keep on coming.
Some days/weeks/years are better than others. You're in a rut and very stressed out.
Maybe a good New Year's Resolution would be to try not to stress out as much. Remember, you're on the same team.....
Gee, I should take my own advice....
good luck!
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:08 PM |
| |
|
CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
I think you guys need to have a heart to heart conversation - just open communication. Allow each of you to talk (in a calm voice) about what is bothering you and how you can make it better 
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:09 PM |
| |
|
jes81276
summer fun!
Member since 3/06 4962 total posts
Name:
Jaime
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
I understand that he is upset, but you got into an accident.....youd didn't do it on purpose. And as far as the fridge goes, kids will be kids. Shyt happens. He should be grateful that you didn't get hurt in the accident. Those are just material possessions....and can be fixed/replaced. Sorry, but that is just my honest opinion.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:11 PM |
| |
|
MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
i can see his frustration but he needs to chill.
the car in an accident,your daughter scratching the fridge and the early train are not your fault. He should be glad you are OK from the accident.
Id avoid him until he cools off. Then try to take time out and maybe make him a nice dinner or do something that he likes- like see a movie that he wants to see- just to appease him.
Hopefully it will blow over- sounds like hes super stressed. Hope it gets better for you
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:12 PM |
| |
|
Juliet
Family is Complete!
Member since 5/05 5913 total posts
Name:
Juliet
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Personal opinion is that there is something else bothering him. Maybe work related. My DH flips sometimes and gets nasty and it is usually a result of stress at work.
If you had a car accident, his concern should be YOU! If your daughter scratches the fridge, he should understand that she is a child.
And if he is complaining about standing in the cold for 10-15 minutes, he needs to remember that it hasn't really gotten below 35 this winter. I have waited on train platforms in 10 degree weather for 45 minutes waiting for a train that didn't come. I wish I was able to wait for a train in weather like this winter.
As far as how to show him appreciation, I have found that my DH needs to be thanked for something little that he did. Thank him for something that you may not think he needs to be thanked for. It could be something you consider part of his responsibility in the house, but if you thank him, it shows that you see he does it.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:13 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
thanks girls for all your advice
One of his BIG problems is that he doesnt do for him slef and put himself last and then makes out to be everyone elses falt
I tell him get a new car
make your office
NO not now we might need the $$
BUT then he will get me a new car......
I cant do things like that for him
I will not go out and just get him a car becasue I feel that is somethign you talk about and do together
He is the one that makes all the $$$$$
NOT ME - and I work 40hrs a week
he works every now and then.....
I just want to let him know that I do appreciat him BUT HOW do I do that...
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:20 PM |
| |
|
MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Posted by Selden78
I just want to let him know that I do appreciat him BUT HOW do I do that...
im sure there are ways you can "reciprocate" if you know what i mean!
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:22 PM |
| |
|
Juliet
Family is Complete!
Member since 5/05 5913 total posts
Name:
Juliet
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Posted by MrsPorkChop
Posted by Selden78
I just want to let him know that I do appreciat him BUT HOW do I do that...
im sure there are ways you can "reciprocate" if you know what i mean!
Ahh the feminine charms we all possess
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:31 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Posted by MrsPorkChop
Posted by Selden78
I just want to let him know that I do appreciat him BUT HOW do I do that...
im sure there are ways you can "reciprocate" if you know what i mean!
LOL
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:51 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
actual he is the type that if I realy dont show a change he will get realy ****** off and then say later how "I told you how I felt about something and you did nothing to help the situcation"
so even if I give him a little nooky nooky that will not totaly fix everything in the next comming days
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:53 PM |
| |
|
curliegirl
He's here!!!!
Member since 3/06 10128 total posts
Name:
Gina
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Posted by Selden78
actual he is the type that if I realy dont show a change he will get realy ****** off and then say later how "I told you how I felt about something and you did nothing to help the situcation"
so even if I give him a little nooky nooky that will not totaly fix everything in the next comming days
I get the feeling that you just need to vent because myself and a bunch of others have offered up suggestions, however I feel you aren't listening to them.....JMO
Message edited 12/29/2006 12:57:21 PM.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 12:56 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
Posted by curliegirl
Posted by Selden78
actual he is the type that if I realy dont show a change he will get realy ****** off and then say later how "I told you how I felt about something and you did nothing to help the situcation"
so even if I give him a little nooky nooky that will not totaly fix everything in the next comming days
I get the feeling that you just need to vent because myself and a bunch of others have offered up suggestions, however I feel you aren't listening to them.....JMO
No I am still looking for more sugestions besides sex.....
|
| Posted 12/29/06 1:21 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: BIG fight - repost from LIF
maybe I should just change my subhect to
what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
|
| Posted 12/29/06 1:23 PM |
| |
|
Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
Name:
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
I say thank you.
Sometimes I send him cards in the mail (since he gets the mail) so he knows I am thinking about him.
He collects disney pins so I surprise him with pins of his favorite character I buy on ebay.
Small gestures to show I care.
Think about things you would like you DH to do to show his appreciation and think of something similar that would make him feel good.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 1:38 PM |
| |
|
MrsNaunie
Kai helps my father dump out.
Member since 9/06 1181 total posts
Name:
Lauren
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
On the first topic- if he is the type to say he told you, and you changed nothing, then ask him.
Tell him that you wantto halp, but need ot know what it is that you can do to make him feel better. It seems like he needs to do something himself... maybe that will make him reevaluate.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 1:42 PM |
| |
|
nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
Well, I would slap my DH if he ever told me I didn't respect him enough. Things are things..He is upset about *objects*, which mean nothing. So the car got damaged, the fridge has a scratch...I think he needs to re-evaluate what is important in life if these are the things he gets most upset about.
As for how I show I appreciate him...I cook his favorite meals and do EVERYTHING in the house (only when I am really really trying) to lessen any other stress on him. I make it so that he has no other responsibilities than to work.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 1:46 PM |
| |
|
eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
Posted by nov04libride
Well, I would slap my DH if he ever told me I didn't respect him enough. Things are things..He is upset about *objects*, which mean nothing. So the car got damaged, the fridge has a scratch...I think he needs to re-evaluate what is important in life if these are the things he gets most upset about.
As for how I show I appreciate him...I cook his favorite meals and do EVERYTHING in the house (only when I am really really trying) to lessen any other stress on him. I make it so that he has no other responsibilities than to work.
I agree with this completely, and I do the same for my DH when I'm trying to show my appreciation. But honestly, I think your DH is overreacting. Things happen - things break, people have car accidents, you have to wait for your ride - that's life!
As for making him feel more appreciated, I'd plan a day for him. Do something he likes to do, prepare his favorite meal, maybe something for just the two of you, etc. And make a point to tell him often how much you appreciate him. Sometimes just hearing the words make all the difference.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:06 PM |
| |
|
2Pisces
Life Coach
Member since 2/06 3337 total posts
Name:
Paige
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
I buy him little surprise things he likes...like flavored milks, buffalo wings and blue cheese little things like that
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:17 PM |
| |
|
tray831
Dee-licious!
Member since 3/06 5355 total posts
Name:
His Baby
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
I thank him for the little things.
Like if he cleans up, or when he cooks, or throws out the garbage, etc.
I will compliment him when I think he looks extra good or if something looks good on him.
Kiss him when he leasts expects it. And it doesnt always have to be on the lips. I loooooove kissing my DH on the back of his neck.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:26 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
thanks girls
I will try all of those things
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:37 PM |
| |
|
luvsbob4603
To a healthy 2013
Member since 5/05 21840 total posts
Name:
To a brand new year to a healthier me
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
Maybe you can make his favorite meal and have a candle light dinner, also buy him a nice gift that he would like' in a reasonable price range' than get some of those fake rose pedals and put them on the bed and the rest is history
Message edited 12/29/2006 2:42:48 PM.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:42 PM |
| |
|
jes81276
summer fun!
Member since 3/06 4962 total posts
Name:
Jaime
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
I cook dinnner every night, and special dinners at least once a week (something more than just our typical "weekday" dinners), I do all of his laundry, go food shopping - making sure to buy special things that he likes. I think that by doing all of these things, I show DH how much I love and appreciate him.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 2:46 PM |
| |
|
Selden78
I lvoe the fall :)
Member since 6/06 3543 total posts
Name:
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
Posted by jes81276
I cook dinnner every night, and special dinners at least once a week (something more than just our typical "weekday" dinners), I do all of his laundry, go food shopping - making sure to buy special things that he likes. I think that by doing all of these things, I show DH how much I love and appreciate him.
I cook dinnner every night,I try to make somethng special on SUndays beacuse I have the time, I do all of his laundry, go food shopping.....BUT theses are the things that are "expected" of me......
maybe i need to ...making sure to buy special things that he likes..Say thank you more....and some of the other things recomend by the other girls
thanks again
|
| Posted 12/29/06 3:10 PM |
| |
|
jes81276
summer fun!
Member since 3/06 4962 total posts
Name:
Jaime
|
Re: what do you girls do to show your man that you appreciate him???
Posted by Selden78
Posted by jes81276
I cook dinnner every night, and special dinners at least once a week (something more than just our typical "weekday" dinners), I do all of his laundry, go food shopping - making sure to buy special things that he likes. I think that by doing all of these things, I show DH how much I love and appreciate him.
I cook dinnner every night,I try to make somethng special on SUndays beacuse I have the time, I do all of his laundry, go food shopping.....BUT theses are the things that are "expected" of me......
maybe i need to ...making sure to buy special things that he likes..Say thank you more....and some of the other things recomend by the other girls
thanks again
To be completely honest, I am a little confused bc I believe in an earlier post you said that you work 40 hours a week - as a SAHM or outside the home? Either way, I don't know why these things would be "expected" of you. Your husband is a big boy and can do these things for himself - they should not be expected of anyone. Maybe he doesn't realize this. I think the question you should be asking yourself is - does he appreciate all the things YOU do for HIM?
Message edited 12/29/2006 3:13:31 PM.
|
| Posted 12/29/06 3:12 PM |
| |
|
| Pages: [1] 2 |
