When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Liam is 13 months.. I have been some stuff that looks like the start of tantrms. He cries and screams when I take something away. It only lasts for a minute or two.. but, I can see it start to head that way.

He is getting very willful. He wants what he wants.

Also, at dinner, he has started opening his mouth, sticking out his tongue and shaking his head back and forth. He thinks it's hysterical So I started calling it spitting. "No spitting", removing the food from his mouth and if he does it again.. dinner is over.. but, honestly.. by the time he is doing this.. he isn't hungry anymore, is just playing, and doesn't care.

So, I guess my question is.. when and how does discipline start?

Message edited 6/22/2010 9:36:11 PM.

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

I'd like to know some more about this too...I was planning to do a search tonight because at almost 12 months, DD is starting this type of behavior too! I can't believe it! I thought I had at least a year to go before the tantrums started..lol

I do tell her no and I think she understands and is good at staying away from things she should not have, but the freak outs when she doesnt get her way are unreal.

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

15ish months it started for us.

I dont really "disipline".. I just walk away from her until she gets over it.

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

I really really really think it's totally appropriate and normal developmentally. They are now aware of what they want - be it a toy, or food, or attention, but don't have the words to get it (yet). It should settle down as they begin to "get their words" and make their feelings known, kwim???
I would discipline the behavioral stuff, but not too harshly at this stage; by 16 months I started getting a little more "serious" with my tone/consequences. Now at 21 months he responds to my "arched eyebrow of doom".

Also the spitting out of the food - my sister (the old pro, mommy of 3) told me to relax about it; yes it's annoying and gross, but they are full of experiments right now in the oral area, everything has a texture, taste, and "feel" that they are curious about. He's building his speaking muscles so let him do it a little (within reason, obviously), it won't last.

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Posted by colette

I really really really think it's totally appropriate and normal developmentally. They are now aware of what they want - be it a toy, or food, or attention, but don't have the words to get it (yet). It should settle down as they begin to "get their words" and make their feelings known, kwim???
I would discipline the behavioral stuff, but not too harshly at this stage; by 16 months I started getting a little more "serious" with my tone/consequences. Now at 21 months he responds to my "arched eyebrow of doom".

Also the spitting out of the food - my sister (the old pro, mommy of 3) told me to relax about it; yes it's annoying and gross, but they are full of experiments right now in the oral area, everything has a texture, taste, and "feel" that they are curious about. He's building his speaking muscles so let him do it a little (within reason, obviously), it won't last.

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Posted by MikesWife

Posted by Jen2999

15ish months it started for us.

I dont really "disipline".. I just walk away from her until she gets over it.

I can't walk away - she comes chasing after me whining and crying. It's pathetic sometimes!!!!

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Posted by sfp0701

Posted by MikesWife

Posted by Jen2999

15ish months it started for us.

I dont really "disipline".. I just walk away from her until she gets over it.

I can't walk away - she comes chasing after me whining and crying. It's pathetic sometimes!!!!

Karen, I know. I try to ignore it too but, then he is hanging on to my legs!

Re: When do tantrums start.. and discipline start?

Abby is almost 22 months - her tantrums started recently. About 2 months ago she picked up a behavior from day care (a teacher actually) that I did not like. I decided to use the access I have to a behavioral psychologist at work and asked how and if I should address this. She told me that at this age, the behavior should extinguish itself within a month - it did. But if it did not, it wouldn't be until the age of 2 that an effective and consistent use of a time-out chair would be approrpriate. The time spent in that chair should be a limited amount of time - for one that young, maybe 20-30 seconds. If the child gets up within that period of time, they go back to the chair until they stay there. It doesnt matter that they have no conception of time at that age - that takes years to develop. What matters is the consistency that the method of used each and every time the undesirable behavior is demonstrated.