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While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
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alexlynn7
Big brother to be!
Member since 9/06 6314 total posts
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
that's awesome!!!!
as ds nears one year old, i am going to have to start implementing this 
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Posted 9/17/08 8:23 PM  |
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partyof6
b nice like u want ur kidz 2
Member since 7/06 7752 total posts
Name:
jeannine
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by InShock
Posted by lastchance1222
its usually one second for each month they are.
I've always heard 1 minute for each year. How do you even keep track of 24 seconds for a 2 year old?  
just came back on to say I mistyped it! lmao...u have no idea how much benadryl I took today....ha, yeah one second for each year--I don't use this method though
Message edited 9/18/2008 7:18:33 AM.
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| Posted 9/17/08 8:38 PM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
I could not imagine giving my one yr old a time-out. JMHO. She only cries when she needs something and is unable to request it. Without her "whining" we may never realize she is in need of someting sometimes. Not to mention that I have an older one who takes up plenty of my attention so she really has to get my attention sometimes somehow. When she is a better talker I will expect her to use only words to have her needs met, but right now, she doesn't have much. At that time I will ignore whining or tantrums without any response.
Right now my discipline for her is a firm "no" and depending what the offense is, removing her from the situation and distracting her.
It works well for her. She has learned not to pull my hair or push her brother with never a single time-out.
ETA: I do not think your method is wrong for you, just stating a different opinion....but in no way judging you or your parenting style.
Message edited 9/18/2008 7:21:31 PM.
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| Posted 9/17/08 8:51 PM |
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partyof6
b nice like u want ur kidz 2
Member since 7/06 7752 total posts
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jeannine
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by mimih
I could not imagine giving my one yr old a time-out. JMHO. She only cries when she needs something and is unable to request it. Without her "whining" we may never realize she is in need of someting sometimes. Not to mention that I have an older one who takes up plenty of my attention so she really has to get my attention sometimes somehow. When she is a better talker I will expect her to use only words to have her needs met, but write now, she doesn't have much. At that time I will ignore whining or tantrums without any response.
Right now my discipline for her is a firm "no" and depending what the offense is, removing her from the situation and distracting her.
It works well for her. She has learned not to pull my hair or push her brother with never a single time-out.
ETA: I do not think your method is wrong for you, just stating a different opinion....but in no way judging you or your parenting style.
EXACTLY what we do...I have 4 kids---12, 13 and the twins...everyone has lived and no tantrums.
Different for all I guess
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| Posted 9/18/08 8:09 AM |
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krashnburn
I am Batman!
Member since 5/05 4093 total posts
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I'm Batman, I tell you!
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
 
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| Posted 9/18/08 9:11 AM |
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Sweets13
Bella Bambini
Member since 5/05 9300 total posts
Name:
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Timeouts are not for everyone just like CIO is not for everyone (counting me). My son is a great, well behaved 2 year old but at times when necessary, which is VERY rare he does go in timeout. I did start at a year old and I am happy with my decision. Some may not agree with it and that's okay~
Message edited 9/18/2008 9:46:08 AM.
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| Posted 9/18/08 9:39 AM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
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Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by Sweets13
Timeouts are not for everyone just like CIO is not for everyone. My son is a great, well behaved 2 year old but at times when necessary, which is VERY rare he does go in timeout. I did start at a year old and I am happy with my decision. Some may not agree with it and that's okay~
Ella is 12 months and we are doing timeouts with her as well.
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| Posted 9/18/08 9:45 AM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
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Mama Cranky
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by JenBenMen
Can you explain how I could do a time-out with my son who is 16 months? I am not sure how to do it
DH has him stand facing the wall with his hands on the wall! DH had to stand there the 1st few times and made sure he stayed. He only gets 45 seconds.
sometimes he cries. Sometimes he stands there quietly and waits!
congratulations on your efforts, looks like they are paying off. I've not gotten to this point yet, but we will soon enough, I am sure.
I have a question on the above line-I've never heard of this before and it is a little shocking (I don't mean to be inflammatory, I swear), but he stands with it arms on the wall for 45 secs?
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| Posted 9/18/08 9:45 AM |
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by mimih
I could not imagine giving my one yr old a time-out. JMHO. She only cries when she needs something and is unable to request it. Without her "whining" we may never realize she is in need of someting sometimes. Not to mention that I have an older one who takes up plenty of my attention so she really has to get my attention sometimes somehow. When she is a better talker I will expect her to use only words to have her needs met, but write now, she doesn't have much. At that time I will ignore whining or tantrums without any response.
Right now my discipline for her is a firm "no" and depending what the offense is, removing her from the situation and distracting her.
It works well for her. She has learned not to pull my hair or push her brother with never a single time-out.
ETA: I do not think your method is wrong for you, just stating a different opinion....but in no way judging you or your parenting style.
You have to know your child, and know what is a true request for something, and what is an act of anger to get a reaction.
Cailen does not get time outs for whining. I model pointing, or have him say "please" and give it to him.
If he is tantrumming and is in a mode where I cannot even communicate with him (where he howls at whatever I offer, or throws it even if he wants it) I walk away. When he comes over to me, he is ready. He understands that.
But, when he is playing, or getting wild, or if he gets angry and hits or throws, and then STARES at us for a reaction, then he gets time out. He is lookign for us to say "No, no hitting" and he does not get that. He faces a corner. When he gets out of time out, and we say "Oh, good picking up your bottle" if he threw it, or "Thank you for being nice" if he gives us alittle pat to say sorry, then he learns the BIGGER reactions happen when he is showing acceptable behavior. I said originally that there needs a plan for specific behaviors that get time out, and there has to be a clear rationale. No arbitrary time outs for behaviors that are their only means of communicating.
Cailen KNOWS when he is going to hit. He lifts his arm up, and chases us to make contact. He knows when he is going to throw. He lifts, makes eye contact, and hurls. If there is enough time from the thought to execution, then he is ready for a time out.
ETA - the wall time-out only began last month, at 16 mts. At 12 mts and younger, we didn't give an official time out. We ignored the tantrum and waited for him to calm down before he could point or show us what he wanted, all of which he was capable of doing by then.
Message edited 9/18/2008 10:17:16 AM.
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| Posted 9/18/08 10:16 AM |
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Re: While the subject of discipline is so hot - I want to share my morning of triumph
Posted by CrankyPants
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by JenBenMen
Can you explain how I could do a time-out with my son who is 16 months? I am not sure how to do it
DH has him stand facing the wall with his hands on the wall! DH had to stand there the 1st few times and made sure he stayed. He only gets 45 seconds.
sometimes he cries. Sometimes he stands there quietly and waits!
congratulations on your efforts, looks like they are paying off. I've not gotten to this point yet, but we will soon enough, I am sure.
I have a question on the above line-I've never heard of this before and it is a little shocking (I don't mean to be inflammatory, I swear), but he stands with it arms on the wall for 45 secs?
Eh, not really. Sometimes its 20 seconds, sometimes 30 - We let him know he's in time out by having him face the wall, and we put his hands there to communicate he needs to stay (remember - no talking during time out) but he puts his hands down, turns, and looks at us to see if we are watching him. We know he gets the point. We aren't vigilant about the "stance," or anything - and after 5 seconds, we know he has the idea he's in trouble!
I have not had to give a time out in DAYS, btw!!! Since that difficult morning. After the one warning, he stops.
He lifted his arm to hit this morning, I gave him the "look," and that arm went "woomp" to his side. He stomped over to a chair and hit it instead! I told him, thats ok, you can hit the chair. Chairs don't get hurt!
He also has hit: The floor, the wall, and his PNP. Then he looks at me to see if its ok. I always tell him, "You can be angry, and you can hit the ____ if you need to. The ____ doesn't get hurt."
Anger is OK. Its human. But he will get in trouble wherever he goes if he thinks hitting is going to be ok if he gets angry.
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| Posted 9/18/08 10:22 AM |
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| Pages: 1 [2] |
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