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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Who is more to blame
when cheating is involved?
**sorry for all the cheating questions i am just frustrated with a friend who is "hanging out" with a married man
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Posted 11/21/05 9:54 AM  |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
IMO, the married person because they took vows. The single person has no commitments to uphold. I think that no matter how much the single person pursued and seduced, the married person should fight off temptation. And if it was the married person that did the pursuing, well, then they are even more to blame.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:00 AM |
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FeliciaDP
♥
Member since 5/05 18599 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Who is more to blame
I honestly think both are equally to blame 
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:02 AM |
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by BabyAvocado
IMO, the married person because they took vows. The single person has no commitments to uphold. I think that no matter how much the single person pursued and seduced, the married person should fight off temptation. And if it was the married person that did the pursuing, well, then they are even more to blame.
I agree. Its really all on the married person. THe single person has no responsibilities to anything - they are not the one who took a vow.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:02 AM |
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baghag
:P
Member since 5/05 10278 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
I would say the one in the relationship.
If someone is in the frame of mind to cheat, they are going to cheat with anyone.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:02 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
yes i agree. The person married is more to blame
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:02 AM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Who is more to blame
The married person. They choose to make a commitment and take vows. They choose to stray from those vows.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:04 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
and although i agree with the fact that the married person is to blame...
i really want to beat my friends azz for doing this
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:06 AM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Redhead
i really want to beat my friends azz for doing this
Does she have illusions of him leaving his SO?
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:09 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Elbee
Posted by Redhead
i really want to beat my friends azz for doing this
Does she have illusions of him leaving his SO?
yes........
and this isn't the first time she "thought" he would leave and he dropped her like a bag of potatoes
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:10 AM |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Redhead
and although i agree with the fact that the married person is to blame...
i really want to beat my friends azz for doing this
I can understand you being p!ssed at your friend. Not only is hurting a marriage, she is ultimately hurting herself.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:19 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by BabyAvocado
Posted by Redhead
and although i agree with the fact that the married person is to blame...
i really want to beat my friends azz for doing this
I can understand you being p!ssed at your friend. Not only is hurting a marriage, she is ultimately hurting herself.
EXACTLY!
she is being such a dumbazz
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:21 AM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Who is more to blame
At first I was going to vote that teh married person is more to blame. BUT as long as the other person knows it, they are just as much to blame. They both lack integrity and therefor BOTH would lose my respect.
I don't think I could remain friends with a girl or guy who had blatent disregard for marriage vows.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:22 AM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Redhead
yes........
and this isn't the first time she "thought" he would leave and he dropped her like a bag of potatoes
That's very S*A*D.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:23 AM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by DebG
At first I was going to vote that teh married person is more to blame. BUT as long as the other person knows it, they are just as much to blame. They both lack integrity and therefor BOTH would lose my respect.
I don't think I could remain friends with a girl or guy who had blatent disregard for marriage vows.
I completely agree!
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:23 AM |
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Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it
Member since 5/05 30683 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Elbee
The married person. They choose to make a commitment and take vows. They choose to stray from those vows.
I agree
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:24 AM |
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Ali1
Mommy
Member since 8/05 3116 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Diane
Posted by Elbee
The married person. They choose to make a commitment and take vows. They choose to stray from those vows.
I agree
I agree too. I always love the married woman who goes after the other woman and blames her for her husband cheating on her. If it was not that lady it would of been another person.
If DH ever cheated on me i would totally blame him only (unless i knew the person who he cheated with). He took vows with me and he broke them. The woman really owes me nothing.
However, I would try and consult with my friend if she was doing it with a married man. I had a friend who did this awhile back and I just told her i was not happy about what she was doing and that I didn't want to hear about her activities with this guy. I didn't want to have to deal with it when the guy would not leave his wife for her.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:28 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Elbee
Posted by Redhead
yes........
and this isn't the first time she "thought" he would leave and he dropped her like a bag of potatoes
That's very S*A*D.
yes but one time i understand
now this time...her doing this again...HER BAD!
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:30 AM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Who is more to blame
Is the guy promising anything? Or is it in her head?
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:35 AM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: Who is more to blame
I would have a big problem with that. I wouldn't cut off the friendship, but I would let my friend know that she is just sabotoging herself from finding a good man and a healthy relationship. On the rare chance he does leave his wife, what's to say he's not going to cheat on her !! I would never be able to trust someone who cheated on his wife with me.
Also... I truly believe in Karma... and she is sending out a lot of negativity out there, its gonna come back to get her.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:53 AM |
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momAGAIN
so outrageous
Member since 7/05 3853 total posts
Name:
TJ
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by missus-hbradio
Posted by BabyAvocado
IMO, the married person because they took vows. The single person has no commitments to uphold. I think that no matter how much the single person pursued and seduced, the married person should fight off temptation. And if it was the married person that did the pursuing, well, then they are even more to blame.
I agree. Its really all on the married person. THe single person has no responsibilities to anything - they are not the one who took a vow.
As an ex wife of a cheater i agree 100% but its different if the other woman dosent know the man is married, if she dose know i question her values as well
Message edited 11/21/2005 10:56:56 AM.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:56 AM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: Who is more to blame
The married person IMO, they have made the commitment, they are responsible for upholding it.
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:57 AM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Who is more to blame
Posted by Elbee
Is the guy promising anything? Or is it in her head?
not sure....she won't tell me all the details but in the past he has said "they are having problems". And he is deciding if he is going to leave the wife or not"
SO he needs time
Which imo is a total lie. He just wants to play around with my friend for a while and then drop her...
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| Posted 11/21/05 10:58 AM |
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momAGAIN
so outrageous
Member since 7/05 3853 total posts
Name:
TJ
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Re: Who is more to blame
my fsil was involved with a married man and he gave her the same line , hes not happy stays for the kids yadda yadda .......ok what man who cheats is going to say no im happy with my wife im just a pig?????????
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| Posted 11/21/05 11:04 AM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Who is more to blame
that's terrible if she thinks there is a chance. I feel bad for your friend.
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| Posted 11/21/05 11:04 AM |
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