Making Plans while TTC

Anyone else feel so frustrated?

My family wants to book a vacation this summer and I have been trying to stall to see if I will be pregnant or not while we are away.

Even little things like making plans next month to see an old friend. I am typically a big drinker so as soon as I don't order a cocktail, I know the cat's out of the bag.

I know you have to continue to live your life while TTC but it can be really tough.

Ok, vent over

Re: Making Plans while TTC

Can you go to the bar and ask for an exotic drink that doesn't contain any alcohol to try to stump them? Get something that is the same color as whatever you normally drink.

Re: Making Plans while TTC

You can get virgin frozen drinks, or even ask for seltzer in whatever glass they're serving alcohol in with a lime. It's not terribly uncommon and then you still appear to be drinking :)

Re: Making Plans while TTC

Definitely frustrating!!

DH's grandmother was talking a few months back about taking the family on a vacation for her 75th birthday in July. Of course, I immediately started counting how far along I could potentially be, and if I was going to have to tell of our TTC plans if she started booking. She ended up changing her mind, so now I don't have to worry about that (although a vacation would have been nice, pregnant or not!).

Re: Making Plans while TTC

i know how you feel! i have a bachelorette party coming up in atlantic city in a few weeks. it was mentioned to me in January and I said i wasnt sure (bc i was obvi hoping to be pregnant by this time and wouldnt want to be there sober bc everyone would know something is up). well i decided a few weeks ago just go to bc i cant put my life on hold while waiting for a bfp. i am still hopeful that this may be my month (will literally find out a day before i go to atlantic city) but either way I will make the best of it....and honestly i would be thrilled to have to figure out how to hide it at this point!!!
its to hard to put things off with the hope of a bfp.

Message edited 3/23/2012 4:47:59 PM.

Re: Making Plans while TTC

We aren't holding off on plans, but it is annoying. It will be a bit of a bummer going on a vacation and not being able to drink. I also keep thinking what if I am preggo and suffer from morning sickness. That really has to put a damper on things.

Re: Making Plans while TTC

you can't stop your life because you might potentially be preggo down the line. Life goes on whether we get knocked up or not. Enjoy your life and hope for a BFP along the way!

Re: Making Plans while TTC

We've been ttc for over a year-- hopefully you won't experience this--but the point is to not put life on hold as you're TTC. GL!

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after 2 plus yrs if i rotated life around ttc i would have been on my couch since late 2009

Re: Making Plans while TTC

Thanks ladies.

I totally agree, and don't want not do anything - but for example, the vacation involves a flight and cruise so I am thinking, IF i am prego, how will I feel at that far along.

I can fake it at a bar with ordering fake vodka soda's = just soda but when you go to a tapas/wine bar with one other person, it's pretty much understood you will share a bottle of wine. Also, entertaining at home is harder to fake.

Just a vent really. Not trying to be insensitive to those who have been trying for a long time. I don't mean to imply that you shouldn't be enjoying your life.

I guess part of my frustration is we had a loss in October at 10 weeks - we didn't start trying agin until recently, but I *thought* I was going to be a mom on April 22nd. The closer we get to that date, the more the whole thing upsets me.

Re: Making Plans while TTC

I know how you feel, but as everyone said you can't plan your life around a possible pregnancy. When we were ttc for DS, I got pregnant the first month, but then, like you, miscarried fairly far along at 10-11 weeks. Then it took about 8 months for me to get a BFP. So even the same person can have radically different experiences at different times TTC.

If you're pregnant for the summer, you'll be able to fly, no problem. You'll probably feel fine. If not, get some travel insurance so you can cancel or get credit for the cost of your trip.

I like to try to tempt fate So I'm throwing caution to the wind, applying for jobs here in London and accepting DS's place at pre-school for September, even TTCing before we're ready becuase we're really hoping to move back to New York imminently. I know once everything falls into place, that's the month I'll get pregnant!

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YES!! absolutely!! And it's frustrating on so many levels....

We have had a trip planned with another couples for May 1 to Punta Cana. Although I would love to go and drink and not worry, we really didnt want to begin to ttc...so we started and then I finally felt okay and I was no big deal, Ill be so happy to be pg that I wont care that I cant drink and I can relax etc. etc. Then I got pg, I even more so wrapped my head around vacationing while pg and was excited..then a chemical came...then I didnt even want to go on vacation because all I could think about was I am going to be on vacation, at a point when I shoulda been in my 2nd trimester and now nothing!

So, yes, its frustrating and upsetting because plans are like milestones and then if you arent where you thought you might be when the plans roll around, you're bummed.

Also, like you said, you kinda are not sure if you should make new plans or not and the whole thing is crazy...

Re: Making Plans while TTC

We're going on a big vacation to Europe this summer. Originally, we were going to hold off TTC, but after doing lots of research, realized you never know how long it's going to take. So, we've decided to TTC and let nature take it's course. And if I do get pregnant beforehand, it'll be fun to celebrate during the vacation. Without alcohol of course!

Re: Making Plans while TTC

I know how you feel. Last year i started ttc, i was conflicted because we had a trip to Europe planned. Well we just came back and still no baby. Continue with your plans and enjoy your vacation!

ETA we also just booked a vacation for 6 mos from now. I pray we will have a BFP by then, but we're not putting life on hold.

Message edited 3/27/2012 5:26:01 PM.

Re: Making Plans while TTC

Dh & I booked a cruise for our 1 year anniversary in June. When I booked it, i already knew something was wrong and that we wouldn't be able to get pregnant quickly. However, by the end of January, i started to try to think more positively and there is this one girl, who is also going through IF issues of her own that we confide in each other (Dh's best friends' wife)
She asked if we had booked any excursions for our cruise and i said no, not yet and she said we should wait in case we are pregnant and then we wouldn't be able to do some of them.
i was thining of this since january and didn't book any excursions at all yet. I think once we get the bill to pay off the balance of the cruise i am just going to bite the bullet and book some because honestly, you can't wait aroud for something that may or may not happen this month or even in the months ahead...