your baby shower...

Are you helping to plan it or is it a "surprise"?
Also, how many people will be at yours?

I am surrounded by girls having VERY big showers, and i feel like im in a minority, mine is definitely going to be pretty small. Just curious what's average.

My sister asked for my list of friends/coworkers i want invited and apparantly i offended her by offering to help plan it. She took it as i wouldn't be happy with what she did. I told her it wasnt about that at all, i just know all my friends recently helped plan theirs so it seemed like the norm to me, and i thought it'd be fun; certainly not meant to be offensive. Again just curious on what others are doing.

Message edited 4/23/2012 11:03:01 AM.

Re: your baby shower...

I am planning my shower. My MIL offered to pay for the location but I'm paying for everything else. I think we are inviting about 60 ladies but, I expect we will have about 40 there. I have to plan it.... I am a former event coordinator and it killed me not to plan my bridal shower.

Re: your baby shower...

I am choosing to be involved, not sure if I will pick the date, but I definitely want to pick the place (also b/c I will most likely be contributing a little financially since my sister & mom can't really afford it). I can use that as my reasoning for being involved w/ my sis so she's not so offended....but maybe you can tell your sister that you really miss party planning since your wedding was in '06 and you've been looking forward to helping plan your shower? Something along those lines perhaps so it doesn't insinuate anything about her party planning skills lol!

As far as # of people I would guess I'd have around 50, b/c that's around the # that attended my bridal shower. It depends how many co-workers show up though, DH has a big family so I will have 2 tables of females for his side alone.

Let me know how the convo goes over with your sis!

Re: your baby shower...

DH and I are planning to have a coed shower at his parent's house, and we offered to help plan it. His family was wondering why I didn't want it to be a surprise, but I don't want them to have to do all the work. (My mom passed away, so if I don't help they really would end up having to organize all of it). I think it's nice of you to offer to help your sister, but if she wants to surprise you, I think that's very sweet.

Re: your baby shower...

Mine will be a "surprise" also. I know it is common for girls to be involved in the planning of their own showers now, but my mom would definitely not go for that. I'm sure it will be great, even if it is small and low key.

Re: your baby shower...

I am involved in planning mine. My mom and sister are not creative at all, so i had to step in We invited 50 ppl but know those OOT are not coming. We just invited them out of courtesy.

Re: your baby shower...

I am planning mine, just booked it actually. It was hard to surprise me for my bridal shower so I figured I may as well plan my baby shower.

ETA: Mine will be small, only about 30 people

Message edited 4/23/2012 11:39:10 AM.

Re: your baby shower...

I'm helping to plan mine, I told my friends I wanted to help as much as possible and they know not to surprise me because I will just find out. We are inviting 60 women only.

Re: your baby shower...

We've decided to do a "Jack & Jill" (co-ed) shower and I'm involved in the planning. Didn't want to be surprised.

Because it's Jack n Jill I suspect it will be a bigger event than usual for showers.

Hope that helps...

Re: your baby shower...

My friend planned it with my MIL. It wasn't a surprise and was at my MIL's house. (I work to much to ever have a "surprise shower"). Had around 18-20 people which felt like a great number! Enjoy it :)

Re: your baby shower...

My shower's not going to be a surprise, but i'm not yet sure how much planning i'll be involved with.

I'll only be inviting about 30 people and we're probably going to have it at my mom's house

Re: your baby shower...

My baby shower was this past Saturday. I helped choose the date & restaurant. My mom & aunt did the rest of the planning. There was close to 50 people at my shower.

Re: your baby shower...

im involved with the planning. i came up with the theme. i was allowed to pick the restaurant. which i was shocked about. my sil and mil are going over some ideas they have and want my input on things. they also want to know what i would like but in the end they will make the final decission. they want some things to be a surprise. im so happy they are doing this for me since my family has showed zero interest!!

i think we will have 35-40.

Re: your baby shower...

I will probably have a small shower (small family and lots of OOT friends with babies).

My mom and best friend are technically planning it, but I helped pick the date since I have a lot of OOT guests, and we're having it in my building (terrace).

Re: your baby shower...

My mom and MIL are planning it - with the help of my sister as well. It is not a surprise, but I am not helping to plan. My mom tells me everything they are doing, though. It is going to be HUGE - it is almost embarrassing! They invited over 100 ppl - probably 75 will be coming. These grandmas are excited so they invited everyone they know.

Re: your baby shower...

Mine was yesterday - total surprise. I wasn't even wearing make-up.

I def didn't want to help plan it. They include your registry info with the invites - that's like asking for presents. I couldn't do that.

Like you said though - it's more unusual (here on LI at least) to NOT help plan it.

eta: we had about 40 guests.

Message edited 4/23/2012 2:42:19 PM.

Re: your baby shower...

I knew about mine. Knew the place, the date and the guest list. There were still a few surprises that my mom put together. She paid for everything though. We had about 30-35 people there.

Re: your baby shower...

I was involved but I didn't try to be. My mom just likes to talk... a lot... and wanted my input on different things. I helped with the guest lists and picking the restaurant and I know the menu and the date and the time of the event. She has even already told me the gifts we will probably be getting from her and my in-laws. Like I said, she likes to share too much.

Anyway, our list was very small. We have small families and few friends and there were a lot of people we felt uncomfortable inviting (due to haven't spoken to them in too long of a time, or because they are out of country, etc) The list we do have- many are out of state and will most likely not come.

Our restaurant min. is 30 people. So hopefully we will have 30-35 people show.

Re: your baby shower...

mine is a "surprise" at my house. DH is planning it. im thinking maybe 40 people. That includes colleagues, family and friends. We have a pretty small family so..I get to help with food planning, but not much else.. i requested tents incase of rain.. but i think it may have fallen on deaf ears..

Re: your baby shower...

Im planning mine with my mother and MIL. They are paying for the restaurant and Im paying for everything else...
Im having about 40 people at mine.
All my friends were involved in planning theirs, I might be a lil more involved than some but about the same as others.

I think you have to do what YOU want to do because it is your party

Re: your baby shower...

I had 2. My sister was pregnant at the same time and most of our family lives OOT so we have one small (8 peopple) joint one and then separate ones for the other sides of the family.

Mine we not a surprise since my parents live in FL I had to know since my mom stayed with us and because we needed to plan all the showers around her trip.

My other one was small, maybe 20 people. I prefer it that way. I didn't help plan it because MIL wouldn't let me but DH did pay for a part of it.

Re: your baby shower...

My mom and sister planned mine. They had to tell me the Tuesday before my shower because DH and I are currently living with them until our house is finished and they couldn't hide it anymore from me.

Re: your baby shower...

Crashing, but mine was a total surprise. I didn't think I was having one at all (Jewish women typically don't, but I really wanted one). There were about 25 people in DH's aunt's house, and it was a blast. Frankly, I have more fun at low-key showers then I do with super formal ones.

Whatever kind of shower you have will be great!

Re: your baby shower...

Mine isn't going to be terribly big because it is my second (DD will turn 6 a month after the baby gets here).

I'll probably know when it is, since 2 of my BFFs are pregnant and we're all due around the same time, we have to pick our dates so they don't overlap.

I'll let my sister and friends surprise me with the theme and stuff.

Re: your baby shower...

When I was preggo with my son my step-mom and mil gave me our shower it was a "surprise" although I know it is becoming more common to know about the shower and help planning it. I still like the whole surprise part but I also like knowing when it will be so I wouldn't look like a wreck. Whatever kind of shower you have will be awesome to welcome your lo into the world!