LIFamilies.com - Long Island, NY


RSS
Articles Business Directory Blog Real Estate Community Forum Shop My Family Contests

Log In Chat Index Search Rules Lingo Create Account

Quick navigation:   

Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted By Message
Pages: 1 [2]

Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st

Member since 5/05

15287 total posts

Name:

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



Does anyone really think that a couple who struggled with infertility never thought of adoption?

Posted 1/20/12 4:54 PM
 

LisaW
Time for me to FLY!

Member since 5/05

13199 total posts

Name:
Did I ever tell you that I hate people?

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by Christine

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



Does anyone really think that a couple who struggled with infertility never thought of adoption?



ding ding ding!!!

Posted 1/20/12 7:24 PM
 

Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!

Member since 5/05

22334 total posts

Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



because its RUDE!!!

Plain and simple...end of story!

Posted 1/20/12 8:22 PM
 

nyligirl
LIF Infant

Member since 2/11

200 total posts

Name:

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by Lisa

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



because its RUDE!!!

Plain and simple...end of story!



ITA! To me, it is WAY beyond rude!

Posted 1/21/12 8:22 AM
 

ihilani
LIF Adolescent

Member since 9/07

858 total posts

Name:
alias

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



It's nosy, it's rude, it's personal, it's none of your business, it's really personal...

Posted 1/21/12 9:08 PM
 

DumpsterBaby
My compass when I'm lost

Member since 5/11

2210 total posts

Name:
My anchor when I get tossed

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

@ssholes Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/27/12 8:25 AM
 

wantabuninoven
My angel has a baby brother!

Member since 7/10

1050 total posts

Name:

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Oh yes the wonderful "you can still adopt" lineChat Icon

Posted 2/3/12 1:57 PM
 

BunnyWife
Insert Witty Comment Here

Member since 5/07

8274 total posts

Name:
BunnyWife

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

People are moronsChat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/3/12 4:13 PM
 

McSullivan
.

Member since 5/05

1573 total posts

Name:

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by LisaW

Posted by Christine

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



Does anyone really think that a couple who struggled with infertility never thought of adoption?



ding ding ding!!!



Exactly!! I also feel that it's nosy and rude. It's such an intensly personal decision and is not appropriate for public consumption.

Posted 2/15/12 11:31 AM
 

MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3

Member since 1/06

19197 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



It's rude and nobody's business. Especially if you know that the couple were not able to have one of their own. If my IF treatments didn't work, we were not going to adopt. That was nobody's business why but our own.

Posted 2/15/12 6:51 PM
 

moonmist09
Thank you, St. Gerard!

Member since 2/11

5043 total posts

Name:
Antonella

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

i think its incredibly ruse for people to even ask. Its a very personal matter and if we wanted to discuss it with you, we would.
My SIL just announced she is preggers with her second child. She has been married 4 years. DH and I have been married for 9 months and we have been trying just as long. Our IF journey has not been easy so far with my issues...and i don't discuss those issues with anyone except DH and he and I both agreed we would not say anything to anyone. But everyone is already asking us, when will you have kids. I'm sorry, I didn't know that I had to announce to the world that we are "trying" Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

If and when I want to let you know what is going on in my private, personal life, i will. until then, stay out of it and keep your opinions to yourself.

Posted 2/24/12 10:29 AM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Posted by MrsRbk

Posted by hdrd0411

I don't understand why this is a bad question? I mean if you can't have children, but you want children, why wouldn't this be an honest question



It's rude and nobody's business. Especially if you know that the couple were not able to have one of their own. If my IF treatments didn't work, we were not going to adopt. That was nobody's business why but our own.




I took the original situation as one where the person's IF issues were already part of the conversation. If not, I never advocate poking into someone's personal life. I HATE it when people ask me or other married couples when they are going to have children. I never ask (well we did discuss it with our best friends, but other than that) because you never know what someone is going through.

BUT I feel like if someone is telling you they're having trouble with IF, bringing up adoption is a natural response, even though I can see why people would find it rude. I just don't think it's intended in that manner.

Posted 3/15/12 6:14 PM
 

lucyloo
nope

Member since 1/06

9758 total posts

Name:

....

Message edited 3/8/2013 9:51:46 PM.

Posted 3/28/12 2:26 PM
 

kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!

Member since 8/07

12475 total posts

Name:
Keri

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

Chat Icon

Posted 3/30/12 4:47 PM
 

FranM
And so it goes....

Member since 9/05

2217 total posts

Name:

Re: Did you ever think of adopting?

BTDT and Guilty - I have brought the subject up, more like added to the conversation with someone who is having a difficult time conciveing.
We adopted our son. I share our experience if I think it may bring insight or in some way be helpfull.

I would not blurt out why dont you adopt any more than I would blut out when are you having a child. - that I think is rude.

Posted 5/8/12 12:11 PM
 
Pages: 1 [2]
 

Potentially Related Topics:

Topic Posted By Started Replies Forum
We're in the process of adopting...Update: All Ours!!! MrsMerlot 12/3/08 14 Pets
Arkansas Initiative 1: Ban on Gay couples adopting children..passed. MrsPJB2007 11/5/08 29 Families Helping Families ™
Would anyone be interested in adopting a stray cat? HoneyBadger 10/15/08 0 Pets
Dogs rescued from puppy mill at NSAL- please consider donating (or adopting!) to help Goobster 11/13/07 1 Pets
This is tough - 2 Yellow Labs need adopting - Update @ bottom! Gertyrae 7/20/07 17 Pets
ADopting from a shelter vs rescue group.....discuss please. btrflygrl 11/7/06 7 Pets
 
Quick navigation:   
Currently 574117 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
New Businesses
1 More Rep
Carleton Hall of East Islip
J&A Building Services
LaraMae Health Coaching
Sonic Wellness
Julbaby Photography LLC
Ideal Uniforms
Teresa Geraghty Photography
Camelot Dream Homes
Long Island Wedding Boutique
MB Febus- Rodan & Fields
Camp Harbor
Market America-Shop.com
ACM Basement Waterproofing
Travel Tom

      Follow LIWeddings on Facebook

      Follow LIFamilies on Twitter
Long Island Bridal Shows