Child Hitting your children - WWYD

We have been going to gymboree since the boys were 4/5 months old. They LOVE it and so do I. Until recently.

There is this one little boy (also 17 months old) that consistently goes around hitting/swatting/pushing all the other kids around. It is not just a normal toddler phase where the child swats at others, its violent and constant. (ever since i have known him) The mother is fully aware of this and doesn't discipline him enough. Its more "ohhh he is such a boy, hahahha" while he is on top of another little girl banging her head with both his hands (closed fisted)

In all honesty, i think something may even be "wrong" with him. He has hit BOTH my kids more than a dozen times over the last few months. Today, he literally made 2 children LEAVE within the first few min of class. I was holding mine most of the time and staying away from him. (not really a fun open play) I even told his MOTHER, i am too fat to be chasing these kids by myself today! (i am 7 months pregnant and NOT in the mood ) He swats at them, i keep picking them up and moving them. At one point i have them BOTH in my arms and he is still trying to get to them. She takes him to the other side of the open gym, i put M down for a min to get a tissue and he lunges at M, within seconds he has a fist full of my sons hair in one hand and managed to get 2 hits to his face in before i throw L down and pick M up. I can not even TELL you the rage I felt.

I drag both of them out and while im strapping them in, she says something about being sorry while smiling?!

It took me over an hour to get ready and get there, within 15min I had to pack up and leave. I felt so bad that i didnt protect him. I felt rage that she wasnt shadowing her OBVIOUSLY violent child. I feel bad that my kids cant enjoy something i pay A LOT of money for. I called gymboree and was basically told i had to speak to a manager tomorrow. I am going to have them reimburse me for the session (today was only the 2nd class) bc i cant go back with that child anymore. There is no enjoyment. and it is too much work to pack up toddler twins while pregnant only to have to come back if he shows for class. This was his mothers fault, if it happens again, its MINE. i need to protect them and there is no "playing nice" with this kid. I have tried over and over.

My boys are sweet and I really want to keep them that way, but everything in my body wanted Marco to get up and BEAT this child, but he just hung his head and cried. It is replaying in mind over and over. I am around kids all day every day and i have never ever seen anything like this.


WWYD?

Message edited 1/9/2013 9:02:11 PM.

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Is there someone to monitor the children? I would think someone from Gymboree would be in charge of watching the kids. If so, I would probably draw their attention to that child. I am surprised more people (especially the little girls Mom) didn't say something to a manager at that time. I would have ZERO tolerance for anyone pulling my sons hair. I can't believe she was smiling. I would be mortified if that was my son. As far as what I would do..Def ask for reimbursement and also speak to a manager about someone monitoring the free play. Sorry you even had to deal with something like that!

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Wow. I'm horrified with you. I can't believe the mother does nothing!!!! The other day when my DS hit yours I was on him like white on rice saying NO HIT. Gentle. Be nice.
She really needs to take her son out of the class if he is unable to behave at a 'normal' level.
I would call the manager tomorrow and explain what happened and tell them that your two and the rest of the class safety is more important than one tuition. Also make sure that the manager is aware that people are leaving the class due to this child. I bet you many won't re-enroll if they have to deal with this shit everytime.

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

what gymboree was it? A child was asked to leave the gymboree as a member at my location because so many people complained about his behavior

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

COMPLAIN...COMPLAIN...COMPLAIN...
I would not tolerate it at all and I would have said something to the mother and then go and complain to a manager.. That is totally unacceptable....

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I would tell her that yeah boys will be boys but her kid obviously has an issue and she needs to be on top of him more. The other children dont go around hitting everyone so its obviously not normal. I dont know how you keep your cool because I'd yell at her. I HATE those wishy washy moms who dont discipline and correct their kids. Id also tell the directors. Maybe talk to other moms who this kid has tormented. She needs to go with her beastly kid. I'm so mad for you.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

That's just out of control. The mother needs to learn how to discipline her son. I would call to speak with the manager first thing tomorrow morning. This is something for your children to enjoy, not get beat up on. Like you said, you pay a lot of money for it. Who would want to pay money to watch their children get hit?

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

You have FM.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I am so angry for you right now! i don't know how you managed to restrain yourself. I don't think I would have been able to. This child needs to be removed from the program. Did any of the other parents say anything?

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

And while going to the other area of the gym Id probably say something to my kids liek "come on, this little boy isnt being nice and his mommy doenst seem to want to correct him and keeps letting him do it". The kids are too young to understand that so its not like you are teaching your kids to be passive agressive. But hopefully she gets the point.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I think that there is no question that Gymboree needs to get involved! You pay them for a safe learning enviornment. Why should all of you have to leave the class.

I am very understanding about child phases, and I know what it feels like to be mortified that my child did something that he "normally" would not do. However, this seems like a pattern and violence against another child is not tolerable. That two children left because of him is isane.
Maybe instead of a group class, he needs one on one therapy.

You need to speak to Gymboree and encourage the other parents as well. If he is not ready for a socail setting like that class, then he should not be part of it.

I have a boy, a "boy" boy, who loves play fighting, wrestling and imagination games, and those actions you desribe are not just "boy" actions. Escpecially the one against the little girl.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I would speak to the center owner.

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Ok, so my reaction may not be right, but in all honesty if I saw another child on top of my child the way you describe and the mother did not immeduately pull her child off, I would grab the child off my child, yell no hitting to the child. If it happened again, I would inform management and request that the child not be allowed to return.

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I used to be a teacher at Gymboree. It was a long time ago, so I don't know how their policies have changed. If this was during free play, then that is not really monitored by a teacher. They kind of have someone sit at the front desk but they're not in the play area. So the teacher probably would have no idea what is happening unless you bring it to their attention.

In this situation, you should definitely speak to a teacher at the very least but I would go straight to the manager. They should speak to the child's mother. I'm sorry you're going through this. This should be a fun experience for your children to enjoy.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I have spoken to the mother soooo many times about this. Its not occasional, it is every single gym and it is numerous times during that 45 min. most i get to block or pick them up so he misses, but some i cant catch in time. I'm embrassed FOR her. but i really think this kid could actually HURT my kids, he is much bigger, stronger. I have calls in, we will see where it goes. I know of two other moms who are going to say something today too. This kid is going to hurt someone, i know it.

Message edited 1/10/2013 12:34:34 PM.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Complain to the gymboree manager.

I love our gymboree because they are militant about having all kids healthy & safe.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Are you sure she didn't get kicked out of the class? It sounds as if she did. If you left after 15 minutes of being there, and she was giving you a half a$$ed apology while you were at your car, then maybe someone saw the hair pulling, and asked her to leave?

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

I am so angry for you. How could anyone let their little animalistic child run wild like that? Definitely talk to a manager and let them know that they need to take care of it before things really get out of hand even more since a lawsuit is evidently in their future. And tell him that ALL moms in that playgroup feel the same way about this kid. He really needs to be kicked out.

I went to a free session at the Bayside Gymboree where the older sister of a child in the class was sitting in on the class (her grandmother watched the kids while her parents worked) This girl was a complete animal. She was 4 in a 1.5 year old class & very dangerous. No one reprimanded her. At the end they asked me if I would be joining, I asked them how often the older sister sat in on the class & they told me every week so I told them, there is no way that I'd send my kid there then. I liked Little Gym a lot because they don't stand for that, from what I've seen.

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Which plainview Teacher is there? Tell them

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

Theres nothing Im going to say that everyone else hasnt already I just wanted to offer you My blood would be boiling as Im sure yours was too. This is unbelievable and I just cannot believe the mother did nothing..I am so sorry for you and your boy

Child Hitting your children - WWYD

As much as it sucks, I would get a refund and go elsewhere if they aren't willing to intervene. As the mother of a hitter, I watch her like a hawk during play sessions. Yes, it limits my mommy chit chat time, but since I know my kid hits I can't take my eye off her for a second.

Each and every time she hits, I comfort the"victim" apologize to the parent and scoop her up without a word and leave the class for good that day. Despite the money we've paid, we have never made it more than 15 minutes :/

So I guess what I'm saying is that im not willing to keep my daughter out of classes like that bc its the only time she sees other children, but the trade off for that is having to be hyper vigilant. If this kids mother can't do that, then getting kicked out of Gymboree may be the least of her problems in a few years.

Re: Child Hitting your children - WWYD

IMO, her and her kid are the ones that need to pack up and leave. If she can't do that herself then people need to complain to the manager about her and have them ask her to leave. Not fair for you and the other parents to cut your fun short. Me and my big mouth I would say something to the mother directly and let her know EXACTLY how I feel about the situation. But that's me.