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Spinoff to playdate and DH.

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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

6791 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

OMG - just stop having playdates with the "DH bringer" - problem solved.

Posted 7/6/13 11:45 AM
 
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olive98
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/12

791 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



But that is how YOU feel. And that is fine. Not everyone lives their lives the way you do. I don't see why that is such a big deal? If it bothers you that much, don't hang out with people who are notorious for bringing their DH. Problem solved.

And you still haven't clarified why it is such an issue that the DH is there. Or why DH would be so pissed. Is it because its a man? My DH isn't the type of person to bothered if I am hanging out with another couple so I just can't relate to why you feel this way. And that's ok too. Different strokes and all that.



From this guy and DH, it's kind of like, it's bad enough when a mom overstays. But you come home and have some guy floating around in your pool, enjoying your backyard.
While I'm out working my ass off. It is a male thing. There's no need for it. Not that I think anything sexual would happen. Obviously it wouldn't.




That sounds like a bit of jealousy on your dh's part.



Jealous that a strange guy is hanging out in his pool while he's working? Yeah, that has something to do with it.

I wouldn't be happy if the roles were reversed either.



No jealous that another man is not working as long as he is. That is how you just made it sound.



Annoyed that an uninvited, strange man is hanging out with your wife and kids in your pool.



STRANGE? lol. You both know the wife, correct? How STRANGE can the dh be then?





I know! STRANGE MAN I don't understand either! He is the child's father and the mothers husband. How is he a strange man.

Posted 7/6/13 11:46 AM
 

ANR1211
My loves

Member since 2/11

2131 total posts

Name:
A

Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Not weird. Only way it would be weird is if the playdate was taking place out of the pool and the guy was swimming alone. If he's hanging out with the kids or moms- not weird.

Posted 7/6/13 12:04 PM
 

MegZee
My bunny

Member since 5/06

8777 total posts

Name:
Meaghan

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

It's threads like these that make me happy to be a FTwM.

My DH is a teacher and is off all summer- if DD is invited to a play date should I decline because I am at work and Dh is home?

Posted 7/6/13 12:29 PM
 

rugratmama
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/12

432 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by olive98

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



But that is how YOU feel. And that is fine. Not everyone lives their lives the way you do. I don't see why that is such a big deal? If it bothers you that much, don't hang out with people who are notorious for bringing their DH. Problem solved.

And you still haven't clarified why it is such an issue that the DH is there. Or why DH would be so pissed. Is it because its a man? My DH isn't the type of person to bothered if I am hanging out with another couple so I just can't relate to why you feel this way. And that's ok too. Different strokes and all that.



From this guy and DH, it's kind of like, it's bad enough when a mom overstays. But you come home and have some guy floating around in your pool, enjoying your backyard.
While I'm out working my ass off. It is a male thing. There's no need for it. Not that I think anything sexual would happen. Obviously it wouldn't.




That sounds like a bit of jealousy on your dh's part.



Jealous that a strange guy is hanging out in his pool while he's working? Yeah, that has something to do with it.

I wouldn't be happy if the roles were reversed either.



No jealous that another man is not working as long as he is. That is how you just made it sound.



Annoyed that an uninvited, strange man is hanging out with your wife and kids in your pool.



STRANGE? lol. You both know the wife, correct? How STRANGE can the dh be then?





I know! STRANGE MAN I don't understand either! He is the child's father and the mothers husband. How is he a strange man.



If the wife barely knows the the other mom, and the DH has met him once at school, you would consider that KNOWING someone? I don't.

Posted 7/6/13 12:50 PM
 

Kidsaplenty
Sister love

Member since 2/06

5971 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

I feel like I'm listening to something one of my uber-conservative, Muslim SILs would say about playdates and husbands tagging along.

Posted 7/6/13 12:53 PM
 

BeachGal
LIF Adult

Member since 2/10

2827 total posts

Name:
J

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Again......so weird! Someone brought their DH over to a swim play date? Ummm, I have a pool and I would not like that one bit.



Why would you find this weird?



Because if I was invited to a woman's pool and her DH was not home, there is no way on Earth that my DH would come with me. I find that very rude actually. When this happens do you tell the host he is coming so she is prepared? My DH would not do this even if I paid him, lol.

Eta-my DH is very social and gets along great with all but this is not his cup of tea!!




Prepared for what?

Ok, so this is not your dh's "cup of tea", I get that. Why is it wrong for another dh to do that though that enjoys to hang out with others?



By prepared I meant food, etc. and........choice of bathing suit!! Ha ha ha!!!!

In this hypothetical situation, this DH shows up out of the blue right? That is definitely wrong and weird. If I invite the entire family to hang out with my entire family, that to me is not a play date. My DC are under 2 so I don't have much experience with the whole play date thing but I'm glad I have a heads up!

Posted 7/6/13 1:18 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by olive98

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



But that is how YOU feel. And that is fine. Not everyone lives their lives the way you do. I don't see why that is such a big deal? If it bothers you that much, don't hang out with people who are notorious for bringing their DH. Problem solved.

And you still haven't clarified why it is such an issue that the DH is there. Or why DH would be so pissed. Is it because its a man? My DH isn't the type of person to bothered if I am hanging out with another couple so I just can't relate to why you feel this way. And that's ok too. Different strokes and all that.



From this guy and DH, it's kind of like, it's bad enough when a mom overstays. But you come home and have some guy floating around in your pool, enjoying your backyard.
While I'm out working my ass off. It is a male thing. There's no need for it. Not that I think anything sexual would happen. Obviously it wouldn't.




That sounds like a bit of jealousy on your dh's part.



Jealous that a strange guy is hanging out in his pool while he's working? Yeah, that has something to do with it.

I wouldn't be happy if the roles were reversed either.



No jealous that another man is not working as long as he is. That is how you just made it sound.



Annoyed that an uninvited, strange man is hanging out with your wife and kids in your pool.



STRANGE? lol. You both know the wife, correct? How STRANGE can the dh be then?





I know! STRANGE MAN I don't understand either! He is the child's father and the mothers husband. How is he a strange man.



If the wife barely knows the the other mom, and the DH has met him once at school, you would consider that KNOWING someone? I don't.



Then how do YOU meet people? Can they only be met at certain places and in certain situations? Sorry, but I am just not getting the problem.

Posted 7/6/13 1:25 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Again......so weird! Someone brought their DH over to a swim play date? Ummm, I have a pool and I would not like that one bit.



Why would you find this weird?



Because if I was invited to a woman's pool and her DH was not home, there is no way on Earth that my DH would come with me. I find that very rude actually. When this happens do you tell the host he is coming so she is prepared? My DH would not do this even if I paid him, lol.

Eta-my DH is very social and gets along great with all but this is not his cup of tea!!




Prepared for what?

Ok, so this is not your dh's "cup of tea", I get that. Why is it wrong for another dh to do that though that enjoys to hang out with others?



By prepared I meant food, etc. and........choice of bathing suit!! Ha ha ha!!!!

In this hypothetical situation, this DH shows up out of the blue right? That is definitely wrong and weird. If I invite the entire family to hang out with my entire family, that to me is not a play date. My DC are under 2 so I don't have much experience with the whole play date thing but I'm glad I have a heads up!



So she should have called and ASKED if her dh could come too? lol

Posted 7/6/13 1:26 PM
 

rugratmama
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/12

432 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Again......so weird! Someone brought their DH over to a swim play date? Ummm, I have a pool and I would not like that one bit.



Why would you find this weird?



Because if I was invited to a woman's pool and her DH was not home, there is no way on Earth that my DH would come with me. I find that very rude actually. When this happens do you tell the host he is coming so she is prepared? My DH would not do this even if I paid him, lol.

Eta-my DH is very social and gets along great with all but this is not his cup of tea!!




Prepared for what?

Ok, so this is not your dh's "cup of tea", I get that. Why is it wrong for another dh to do that though that enjoys to hang out with others?



By prepared I meant food, etc. and........choice of bathing suit!! Ha ha ha!!!!

In this hypothetical situation, this DH shows up out of the blue right? That is definitely wrong and weird. If I invite the entire family to hang out with my entire family, that to me is not a play date. My DC are under 2 so I don't have much experience with the whole play date thing but I'm glad I have a heads up!



So she should have called and ASKED if her dh could come too? lol



If I'm not invited as a family, I would leave DH home. I wouldn't ask.

But if I couldn't be without DH for a couple of hours, I would least let the mom know he was coming.

And I always let people know before showing up if I have my other 2 kids. It's the polite thing to do.

Posted 7/6/13 1:46 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54921 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

This is exactly why I don't do play dates. Ay yai yai.
Women are so uptight. Give me a bunch of guys drinking beers in a sports bar any day!!!

Posted 7/6/13 2:21 PM
 

sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!

Member since 1/07

9764 total posts

Name:
Tricia

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by 2BadSoSad

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



How often is this happening that it is THIS big of an issue for you? If it is "just 2 or 3 hours" suck it up, honestly. You wouldn't, but the majority of us see nothing wrong with it. Honestly, it is NOT that big if a deal to get your panties up in a bunch about. Let it go, be pleasant and maybe instead of harping on the fact that he is there, get to know him instead so when it happens again, you are just hanging out with another friend.



It's not a big deal. I just don't see how so many if you think
This is the norm. Every other mom I have dealt with, it's just been moms. Maybe it's a SAHM thing? I don't know. I've done weekend playdates with working moms and their DHs weren't around or busy. It's like an unspoken thing.



I think you just hit the nail on the head. I am a FWM and my DH does everything he can with us. We both go to most birthday parties and we both go to playdates. If I am meeting friends for an outdoor concert or something he TRIES to get home early to go with us. He just doesn't want to miss out and it's not like I am doing these things without him. He works very long hours and wants to soak up every second with DS.

Posted 7/6/13 5:45 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by BeachGal

Again......so weird! Someone brought their DH over to a swim play date? Ummm, I have a pool and I would not like that one bit.



Why would you find this weird?



Because if I was invited to a woman's pool and her DH was not home, there is no way on Earth that my DH would come with me. I find that very rude actually. When this happens do you tell the host he is coming so she is prepared? My DH would not do this even if I paid him, lol.

Eta-my DH is very social and gets along great with all but this is not his cup of tea!!




Prepared for what?

Ok, so this is not your dh's "cup of tea", I get that. Why is it wrong for another dh to do that though that enjoys to hang out with others?



By prepared I meant food, etc. and........choice of bathing suit!! Ha ha ha!!!!

In this hypothetical situation, this DH shows up out of the blue right? That is definitely wrong and weird. If I invite the entire family to hang out with my entire family, that to me is not a play date. My DC are under 2 so I don't have much experience with the whole play date thing but I'm glad I have a heads up!



So she should have called and ASKED if her dh could come too? lol



If I'm not invited as a family, I would leave DH home. I wouldn't ask.

But if I couldn't be without DH for a couple of hours, I would least let the mom know he was coming.

And I always let people know before showing up if I have my other 2 kids. It's the polite thing to do.



You are invited as only so many people, your friends actually SAY that.

I guess it would depend on the situation but usually with playdates, we dropped the kids off and never really stayed. If we do stay, it would be at someone's house that we were friends with they wouldn't care if all of us came.

Posted 7/6/13 7:06 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by NervousNell

This is exactly why I don't do play dates. Ay yai yai.
Women are so uptight. Give me a bunch of guys drinking beers in a sports bar any day!!!



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/6/13 7:07 PM
 

gina409
TWINS!

Member since 12/09

27635 total posts

Name:
g

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

wow let me stay clear of these playdates with these weird guys who omg hang out with their kids and go swimming

i need to stay away from them

i don't drive so if u invite me we come as a package.if that is weird well then that is your issue bc we have been many playdates together

Posted 7/6/13 7:18 PM
 

mrsboss
my little love

Member since 12/09

5054 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by afternoondelight828

Posted by NervousNell

This is exactly why I don't do play dates. Ay yai yai.
Women are so uptight. Give me a bunch of guys drinking beers in a sports bar any day!!!



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon


Seriously. If this is what play dates and staying at home is like, DH would find me hanging from the ceiling fan one day.

Posted 7/6/13 7:19 PM
 

ali120206
2 Boys

Member since 7/06

17792 total posts

Name:

Spinoff to playdate and DH.

If I didn't want people I didn't know in my pool, I wouldn't invite them. Although I am the one that usually accompanies DS on playdates alone, I have friends who do everything with their dh.

Posted 7/6/13 7:44 PM
 

Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!

Member since 5/05

20046 total posts

Name:
Gerty ®

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



Now THIS I find weird...been reading all these posts and how do the friendships NOT become intertwined. I know my husband has become friends with the husbands of my female friends. Obviously there are different levels to these friendships but he IS friendly with all the DHs. If a mom invited me over and I brought DH, when her DH came home my DH would start chatting with him. Maybe my husband is strange but I would find it stranger that a husband wouldn't befriend his children's friends fathers....

Posted 7/6/13 8:03 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by Gertyrae

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



Now THIS I find weird...been reading all these posts and how do the friendships NOT become intertwined. I know my husband has become friends with the husbands of my female friends. Obviously there are different levels to these friendships but he IS friendly with all the DHs. If a mom invited me over and I brought DH, when her DH came home my DH would start chatting with him. Maybe my husband is strange but I would find it stranger that a husband wouldn't befriend his children's friends fathers....




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Posted 7/6/13 8:16 PM
 

2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

6791 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

This thread is more exhausting than chasing your kids around at a playdate. From now on, Im having my DH do my posting for me on here....unless that is weird.

Posted 7/6/13 8:18 PM
 

afternoondelight828
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

3363 total posts

Name:
Afternoon

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by 2BadSoSad

This thread is more exhausting than chasing your kids around at a playdate. From now on, Im having my DH do my posting for me on here....unless that is weird.



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Posted 7/6/13 8:23 PM
 

Mrs213
????????

Member since 2/09

18986 total posts

Name:

Spinoff to playdate and DH.

WHO THE HELL CARES!!! LOL

Posted 7/6/13 8:29 PM
 

Mrs213
????????

Member since 2/09

18986 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by 2BadSoSad

This thread is more exhausting than chasing your kids around at a playdate. From now on, Im having my DH do my posting for me on here....unless that is weird.




Omg that's great Chat Icon

Posted 7/6/13 8:30 PM
 

springchick
make a wish

Member since 5/08

3566 total posts

Name:
justask

Spinoff to playdate and DH.

I dont have kids right now but when we do DH is only off during the week, he work 50+hrs a week so I am pretty sure that if our kid(s) have a playdate during that day he is off he would probably tag along so the little time he have off he can actually spend it with kids.

Posted 7/6/13 8:33 PM
 

rugratmama
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/12

432 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff to playdate and DH.

Posted by Gertyrae

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Posted by rugratmama

Posted by hopingforbaby

Again, I don't see the big deal. Especially since its a play date for the kids. If just the DH showed up out of nowhere without his wife who I made the plans with I may feel weird about that. If the wife is there though; why is it a problem?



So you don't think it's overstepping?



No, not if you invited the kid over for a play date. Is it just because its a man that its considered overstepping? Would if be an issue if the mom brought the kids little sister for example?

I feel like poor dads cant win in this world. If they arent around, they are bad fathers. If they are around, they are "creepy". DH and I do everything together when it comes to our kid. My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad wasnt around a lot at times so I thank God every day my dh is so active in DS life. Now I have to wonder if people around us think we are werid or creepy though. Chat Icon



FTR....I try to have playdates cleared out before DH gets home. Because he does have a very long day. On the occasion where a mom stays longer he will say hello, and go about his business.

Playdates ARE for the kids. But sometimes the moms become friends, and it can be a way for SAHMs, like myself, to socialize when you are with the kids all day. Most of the moms I am friends with, are not friends with my DH, nor am I friends with theirs. We have not interacted as couples or families.

If I invited a mom and her kid/kids over and she brought her DH. I would be annoyed and my DH would be pissed, as this guy was. It's overstepping and rude. I always ask to bring my little ones along, and if I can, I leave them with DH. I would NEVER bring DH along, if I knew the mom was home alone and were weren't invited as family.

DH gets PLENTY of time with my kids. 2-3 hours will not hurt.



Now THIS I find weird...been reading all these posts and how do the friendships NOT become intertwined. I know my husband has become friends with the husbands of my female friends. Obviously there are different levels to these friendships but he IS friendly with all the DHs. If a mom invited me over and I brought DH, when her DH came home my DH would start chatting with him. Maybe my husband is strange but I would find it stranger that a husband wouldn't befriend his children's friends fathers....



We're not at that point yet with most of my mom friends. I see them during the week, while DH is working. He hasn't met most of the dads.

Posted 7/6/13 9:19 PM
 
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