Feeling Sad....

So I began my adventure with DS and EI in December of '12 when he qualified for PT services (very late walker, low muscle tone, weak core, etc.). I also pushed for S/L and OT evals. at that time and he did not qualify for those services.

Fast forward to now. DS is 2 yo. He still qualifies for PT and just qualified for S/L and Special Ed. (I am made that we lost 6 months because he didn't qualify in those areas last time). His scores were SO low.... I am devastated. I know his speech was behind, but I was really surprised at the low ed. scores.

I have taken him to a neurologist, who says he is not on the spectrum. His pediatrician says NO to ASD as does his physical therapist. He has many soft signs: low tone, had milk protein allergy, speech delay, can be very perseverative about things, can be hard to transition, etc. but his social is so good. He is very loving, looks you in the eye, laughs, etc. I just don't know what to think. Even if he is not ASD, as a special ed. teacher, I know what struggles lay ahead for speech delayed kids.

I KNOW I am doing the right thing for him. I am GLAD he is getting the services, but I am sad that he needs them. Does that make sense? I know he will make progress but I just can't help but thinking what didn't I do? Where will he be in a few years? Will he be the kid that will always need support? I know that there are other children, God bless them, that have struggles more significant than his, but I just can't help but worry.

Does anyone else feel this way? What helps you? What helps your DC?

Re: Feeling Sad....

Being that your a special Ed teacher I'm sure you're happy that we have these services for our kids. I would be lying if I didn't say I faulted myself in the beginning but I learned that there is no fault to be given. A child is a blessing and some need the extra help to get by. I take it day by day and celebrate his new accomplishments little or big. As long as he's making progress is all that matters to me now. My son is pdd-nos and with almost 2 years of services he's doing amazing!

Re: Feeling Sad....

My son is 3.5 and has been in EI/development preschool since 10 months for global delays. I spent the first couple years looking for a diagnosis. He has had a few MRI's, a few blood test.

There is no diagnosis beyond global delays. He is not on the spectrum, he is not mentally retarded. He is just delayed. I have no idea what that means for his future but I have the same concerns as you. Where will he be in 2 years when K starts? What about after that?

He has come so far, is speaking in 3 word sentences but most people cannot understand him and he is still behind others so I worry. I just keep doing what we are doing, and keep my fingers crossed that it is all going to work out.

Re: Feeling Sad....

I'm with you and like anything else, it's a process. Some days are harder than others.

It gets better. I know it's cliche, but it does. I came across a post I made a while ago and I remember all the terrible feelings I had. The hate, the fear, the anger, the sadness.

It's been a long road, but he's so much better. You'll get there. xoxo

The beginning.

Re: Feeling Sad....

DS is not on the spectrum either, but he is a very tough child and it's very hard not to compare him to other kids, especially because his cousins are his age and he is around them daily.

I also know that it's often in my head, but it's hard not to think that other people are not judging DH and I when he has a meltdown, which is pretty common.

I frequently dread going to events because I know he will probably have at least one episode.

Re: Feeling Sad....

thank you, everyone. it helps to know that we all have similar feelings and concerns. I appreciate it.

CrankyPants, sounds like our DC are very similar. sometimes I feel like it would almost be easier to have some sort of diagnosis, rather than just delayed. I just hope that he makes the jump eventually.

Re: Feeling Sad....

Feeling Sad....

I have twin boys that are almost 23 months. We have been in EI since 3 months old for both starting with toricollis.
Twin A- Torticollis, Speech, SPecial ed== Graduated from all
Twin B- Born with Low tone trunk, high tone legs.
He has been more therapy then the other & also needed to have OT also. He has not been diagnosed with anything more then tight heel cords. He didnt sit up on his own until his 1st birthday. Wasnt crawling until around 15 months. His milestones have been VERY LATE but he is strong & determind. He just started walking about 2 months ago wears orthtic braces AFO's. He may not be a Soccor star but I am ok with that because of wear he is now. He is walking & so determined. Smart, outgoing, funny with a great smile & talks in sentences. There were many days I questioned what kind of life he would have. I was told he may have CP (cerbral palsy) but MRI comes up normal. The Dr's say he is fine. Our P.T still believes he has some form. I don't care.....we are doing all we can do & thats all that matters.
Remember it's ok to feel sad, cry. You are doing great!!! You are getting your dear child the help they need. That's all we can do....ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!