How to make the hitting stop

My DS is a year and a half old and for the most part, a great little boy. But when he doesn't get his way or you stop him from doing something he shouldn't do, he reacts by hitting. He has hit me, my husband, objects, animals, etc... pretty much anything in his reach out of frustration. He has even tried slamming his head into us and I don't know how to stop it.

I yell, I grab his arm and sternly say NO right in his face, pull him away, tell him "not nice, naughty" and he just keeps at it. Ultimately ignoring it or a distraction in some way helps, but usually he just gets over it after a minute or so... but it makes me SO upset when he does this.

I refuse to raise my child to believe this is acceptable behavior, but I don't know what else to do to show him that's not an appropriate way to react. With a new baby on the way in 3 months, I want to set this straight so he doesn't lash out on his new sibling. It's so upsetting to have a child who hits. HELP PLEASE

How to make the hitting stop

Ds is 14m snd does the same thing. If he is not hitting he is throwing thinga. It is always out of frustration and/or anger. I have tried everything as well. Keeping my fingers crossed it is just a stage and when he gets older he will be able to communicate his feelings better. Good luck

Re: How to make the hitting stop

Ignore it, it will increase briefly as he tries to get the reaction but eventually it will stop. Your reaction is what's maintaining the behavior, unfortunately.

How to make the hitting stop

Story of my life!!! My son is turning two and whacks me all the time and it freakin hurts!!

Re: How to make the hitting stop

Re: How to make the hitting stop

Posted by OhBaby2

Posted by Jbon630

Ignore it, it will increase briefly as he tries to get the reaction but eventually it will stop. Your reaction is what's maintaining the behavior, unfortunately.

This is what's so tough about it! I can't help but instinctually react and want to try to make him stop but I know he just keeps doing it more. I just want him to be a good boy who doesn't hit

How to make the hitting stop

I know it's frustrating, but it really is just a phase. My DD used to WHACK herself HARD. SO hard, I had no idea how she handled the pain. Then, she started whacking me and DH, but mostly me. I brought it up to her doc and she said she's just getting frustrated and that's her way to express herself.
I used to take her hands and say 'no, we don't hit, we do nice', and stuff like that. It took a while, but it finally stopped.

How to make the hitting stop

At 2 we say not nice, make her say sorry and show her how to nicely touch. She still does it when she gets frustrated but it's getting better.

How to make the hitting stop

My son is a hitter. He is 3 1/2.
As per his school, we are supposed to ignore the behavior. If he hits someone else and we witness, we are supposed to reward the person being hit and ignore the hitter. If he hits me and I am the only one here, I am supposed to get up and walk away. Admittedly, this is all easier said than done.
If the child is seeking attention, then any attention is getting them what they want.

Re: How to make the hitting stop

I would try to ignore it (though superhard). He probably feeding off the attention he gets from you, DH, etc when he does it. I would do nothing more than calmly say "Cxxx, no".

They all go through these phases, it is so normal and it will not last forever. DS has gone through similar things and now is hitting air when he gets mad (generally not us and just in the air!). It is so hard not to react, but the more we do, the worse it gets and the longer he does it!

It may be a reaction to knowing something is going on sensing the baby and stuff.

Don't let it stress you out too much

Message edited 5/26/2015 1:58:31 PM.

Re: How to make the hitting stop

Re: How to make the hitting stop

Thank you so much everyone! I'm sure it's just a phase and expressing frustration. As hard as it is, I'll do my best to ignore it and keep my reactions/negative attention to a minimum. This too shall pass

Side note: I originally posted under my regular username before I created a second when I was early pg w/ #2. Now I'm far enough along that I'm out of hiding but have been using this name anyway for this pregnancy so in any case OhBaby2 and Linzee636 is me, Lindsay

Re: How to make the hitting stop

DD started hitting at 18 months. As a pp said, your reaction is likely motivating the behavior. DD typically didn't hit when she was frustrated. Her's was motivated by being overstimulated so my approach was different. On occasion when she did hit when frustrated I typically reminded her that we are gentle with ENTER NAME HERE. As long as you don't give in and are consistent it should just be a phase. My DD hitting stopped by 20 months, but it can last months. She still grabs the dogs tail and we are addressing that the same way.
If you grab his arms and yell NO, you're being rough and teaching him it's ok to be rough even if you say it's not.

DH yells at DD sometimes and it kills me because she usually just laughs at him and pulls the dog's tail again.

Re: How to make the hitting stop

My dd went through that phase about the same age. They can't express themselves in words. Sounds like you are doing the right things - saying not nice and redirecting. It passed after a few months, especially after she was able to master some simple words.

How to make the hitting stop

hitting at that age is age appropriate (maybe appropriate is not the right word, but you get the idea) behavior. just be consistent, reward for good behavior.