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readyforbaby
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 395 total posts
Name:
DW
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Hi everyone. I am not a frequent poster but thought it would be good to come on here for some input.
I currently have a 3 year old and due with my second this summer. Both DH and I work full time. Our families have been kind enough to help by watching her 4 full days but I think their gracious help will be coming to an end once I have this baby.
I began looking into daycare options for two kids. Basically it comes down to 2K per month for two kids. Do you think it's worth it that I basically have to work almost 2 weeks to pay for daycare with the other two weeks money going towards the house and bills. Come September 2017, our 3 year old will be in school full time (publics school) and the daycare cost wold be cut in half.
What would you do?
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Posted 3/8/16 1:20 PM  |
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sameinitials
insert creative comment here
Member since 2/12 1998 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
I don't have kids, but the first thing you need to figure out is if you can realistically afford everything (mortgage, bills, entertainment, etc) on just one salary.
How long is your mat leave?
ETA: Sorry, misread something in the original post. But, with mat leave, you will probably have less than 1 year of them both in day care. Do you really want to stop working or are you just questioning if it is "worth it"? If the latter, and you'd want to go back to work after the 3yo is in school, it might not be that easy to get another job.
Message edited 3/8/2016 1:57:15 PM.
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:33 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:36 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
In addition to the financial aspect, like PP said, I would also think about your personal preference - do you WANT to stay home? Do you ever want to go back, if so will you be able to easily get back into your particular field?
If yes and yes, then why not?
Personally, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and I enjoy my job so I don't see myself ever staying home but that is just my personal preference. I would probably have my DH stay home before I did but we both make about the same $$.
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:41 PM |
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nraboni
Uggh...
Member since 10/09 6905 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by mommy2be716
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
Unless she has job security where she can take a sabbatical and come back I would not advise this route.
If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.
My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.
Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.
Message edited 3/8/2016 1:44:55 PM.
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:43 PM |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
You have to analyze your financial situation. For me, even though half of my salary goes to daycare we still need whatever is left over to pay bills.
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:43 PM |
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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6791 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
I would say it depends on two things
1) You can afford to stay home. Yes, daycare will eat up a large chunk of change, but can you survive without the other r50%
2) How will it be for your career once you try to reenter the workforce should you do so. Will that gap negatively affect your career and will you have fallen behind in your industry.
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:53 PM |
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Mrs213
????????
Member since 2/09 18986 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
It sounds like you can afford it. If you stay home will you be able to afford the bills on just your husbands salary? Considering in the grand scheme of things they are only in daycare for a short period of time, unless you are at a point where it's literally costing you money to work I would keep working. As long as you are still bringing in income by working I think it's worth it but it's really a personal decision. Think about how easy or difficult it will be for you to get back into your field after being home for a number of years. I've been on both sides of the coin (not by choice, lost my job) and being a sahm of 2 little ones has been tough on me both mentally and financially. L really preferred working but in my case it didn't financially make sense. It's not a decision to take lightly, good luck with whatever you decide  
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| Posted 3/8/16 1:54 PM |
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Bebelove
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/12 742 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Money aside ,
The biggest thing to consider is how do you feel about having the baby in daycare? Have you looked at any just yet? We looked at several and only liked one.
The (wonderful) center we looked at was around $2600 for newborn and toddler. DH (especially) and I were just not comfortable with daycare. Never expected to feel that way, but that's what happened.
Is putting your 3 yo in a half day nursery program an option, and having family watch baby for a while?
As for finances, if you don't need that extra pay, you might want to consider staying home.
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:03 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Even if you make $100 more a month by working (after paying off daycare), that is $100 more than you would make by staying home.
Not to mention contributing to a 401K or retirement plan and keeping your skills and resume fresh and up to date.
Also I felt my DD benefited SO much from being in daycare from an infant through Pre K. So there is that aspect as well.
The things she learned, the way she was socialized, it was invaluable to her
Message edited 3/8/2016 2:23:38 PM.
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:22 PM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
My parents watch my DS and DH and I work full time - I had to get a new job with 9-5 hours to make it easier on everyone, but even if my salary didn't contribute meaningfully beyond daycare, I would still work. I can't stay home - part time would be ideal, is that something to consider?
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:33 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by nraboni
Posted by mommy2be716
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
Unless she has job security where she can take a sabbatical and come back I would not advise this route.
If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.
My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.
Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.
This 100%. You have to really, really want to stay home. I also could never do it, I almost lost my mind during my maternity leave.
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:37 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by nraboni
Posted by mommy2be716
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
Unless she has job security where she can take a sabbatical and come back I would not advise this route.
If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.
My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.
Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.
ALL of this. It's not that easy to just "stay home for a year and then go back". Depending on your field, jobs aren't that easy to come by.
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:40 PM |
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b2b777
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 4474 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by NervousNell
Even if you make $100 more a month by working (after paying off daycare), that is $100 more than you would make by staying home.
Not to mention contributing to a 401K or retirement plan and keeping your skills and resume fresh and up to date.
Also I felt my DD benefited SO much from being in daycare from an infant through Pre K. So there is that aspect as well.
The things she learned, the way she was socialized, it was invaluable to her
I agree with this. I work in a field that if i leave I wont have the ability to return easily at the same level/pay I am at now. I also would be forfeiting the benefits like my 401k match for retirement. For me sacrificing now for a few years I still come out ahead in the long run.
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| Posted 3/8/16 2:50 PM |
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teachermom
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/11 843 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
If I could afford to I would stay home. I pay an insane amount of money to our sitter and I really loved the year I was home.
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| Posted 3/8/16 3:06 PM |
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readyforbaby
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 395 total posts
Name:
DW
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Thank you all so much for your input. I was starting to think I was crazy for even thinking about going back, or even staying home. Either way, it's no easy decision to make but you've all opened my eyes to some other points.
On a side note… Holy crap, daycare is expensive! 
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| Posted 3/8/16 3:19 PM |
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WannaBeAMom11
LIF Adult
Member since 1/11 7391 total posts
Name:
Name
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Yes, daycare is VERY expensive. Your SD may have ft nursery school so look into that. We are saving $4k a year by switching dd to ft nursery with aftercare. If we get pregnant I will look for an in home daycare or a daycare that is closer to dd's new school so the drop off isn't so crazy.
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| Posted 3/8/16 4:07 PM |
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EMC11709
LIF Toddler
Member since 3/10 484 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by nraboni
Posted by mommy2be716
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
Unless she has job security where she can take a sabbatical and come back I would not advise this route.
If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.
My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.
Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.
This 100%. You have to really, really want to stay home. I also could never do it, I almost lost my mind during my maternity leave.
I agree with the above said. Also maybe consider asking your family member to just to watch the baby and send your older child to daycare, which would cut the cost of daycare.
This is what we decided to do once my Maternity leave ended.
Message edited 3/8/2016 4:29:26 PM.
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| Posted 3/8/16 4:28 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
If you can afford to be home and you WANT to stay home.............stay home. I left teaching to become a SAHM and while giving up my salary was hard at first becoming a SAHM was the BEST thing I ever did!! But that being said, it's the one thing I KNEW from a young age I ALWAYS wanted to do. It's not for everyone but for me, it's exactly what I've always wanted. You have to make the decision that is best for you and your family though!
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| Posted 3/8/16 5:56 PM |
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Funkybutt
LIF Adult
Member since 4/15 3049 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
It's definitely a personal preference based on the above reasons. For me, I would have gone insane if I stayed home. Even now, I have a 6 year old and I go crazy if I have to be home for one of his week vacations. Each person is different and no one answer is right.
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| Posted 3/8/16 7:04 PM |
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Dolphinsbaby
My 3 little guys!
Member since 12/10 2943 total posts
Name:
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by NervousNell
Even if you make $100 more a month by working (after paying off daycare), that is $100 more than you would make by staying home.
Not to mention contributing to a 401K or retirement plan and keeping your skills and resume fresh and up to date.
This is how I feel. As long as you are not in the hole for daycare. I even know some people who are. It is costing them more with daycare than what they bring home (not by much) but they are choosing to send kids for different reasons (one is under her healthcare, her DH is a contractor and my other friend knows if she took time off from her field it would be difficult to get back in and she would probably have to take a pay cut).
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| Posted 3/8/16 7:17 PM |
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SLPRunner
LIF Adult
Member since 12/13 1101 total posts
Name:
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
I considered it while I was on maternity and 1) realized I shouldn't make any decision until I go back to work and really see how it is, 2) in my field, I couldn't exactly just take a year off and easily get a full time position back. The later was the biggest decision. If you really think your head and heart will be at home, then that's another issue. Maybe your family could watch your DC's part time to help off set the costs. The costs of daycare are short term though compared to your career trajectory.
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| Posted 3/9/16 7:39 AM |
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
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Message edited 3/21/2016 6:40:51 PM.
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| Posted 3/9/16 9:51 AM |
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MrsD121011
LIF Adult
Member since 5/12 1460 total posts
Name:
Elicia
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Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
My DH and I are in the exact same boat. I basically break even with daycare expenses and my take home. So far I continue to work because I have been with my company for 8 years, 401k, pension, seniority for vacation time, and I have the medical benefits under my name. Its hard because sometimes I feel like I work for nothing but at the end of the day we have benefits and my kids LOVE thier sitter and all the friends they have made there.
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| Posted 3/10/16 8:36 AM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare
Posted by nraboni
Posted by mommy2be716
if you're able to swing it, stay home for a year, and then go back when your 3 year old starts school
Unless she has job security where she can take a sabbatical and come back I would not advise this route.
If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.
My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.
Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.
I couldn't agree more
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| Posted 3/12/16 1:07 AM |
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