Re: I think I snapped, am I off base???

I totally agree. How old is your daughter? As a matter of fact my SIL's friend has the same story. Her daghter is 16 now but was 2 when she married her 2nd husband and had two new kids with him. The oldest has always felt like an outsider to the "family" I think in these situations it might even be wise to pay MORE attention to the 1st child then the new baby to avoid those feelings. Unfortunately this girl did not get that and is now in trouble with boys, school, etc. We totally have control over how our kids feel in relation to their place in the family and to be honest if your husband won't back you up it is important that you defend yourself and your daughter even if your MIL gets offended. Good luck

Re: I think I snapped, am I off base???

You did the right thing! Are you able to sit down with her now and discuss it? She really needs to understand what she is doing and how it could effect your little girl. Kids pick up on the littlest things.

Re: I think I snapped, am I off base???

you are so not off base! as part of the "first family" of a now "blended family" I am amazed at how some people can totally disregard us, the first ones. Like we don't exist! My DH goes through this too. It's distgusting - and we feel like dirt. My brother is REALLY sensitive about it, and has written off some people who treat him like a second class child.

Tell your MIL and your DH that the kids have to be treated equal, all the time, no divisions, or you will be faced with some hurt, sad kids later on.

Re: I think I snapped, am I off base???

I don't think you were out of line at all. You are a family of 4 and should be looked at that way. I kind of understand why she would want pics of the three of you alone, but shouldn't refer to the 3 of you as a family.

Re: I think I snapped, am I off base???

you are 110% right if whenever a family photo opt came and she just wanted the 3 of you I would be ****** and have said that we are a family of 4 not 3