Do your DC's grandparents "get it"?

I guess this can apply to anyone in your kids life but I'm wondering how many other families are in the same situation.

My in-laws live in LI. We see them about 5 times a year (they make about 3 or 4 trips up and we do 2 down. DS only was diagnosed in January and since then it's like my in-laws are embarassed to acknowledge his situation. They comment on his progress (meaning, they can come into the room and he won't scream) but they make many comments like "Well, when he's older and out of his 'funk' then you guys can do more things together". They seem to think he's going to outgrow his autism and that he'll just snap out of it. Believe me, I wish for this every day but the reality is something that we've worked hard to grasp and I don't have the energy to explain to other people that yes, he may grow and improve in social situations but he'll probably always struggle with many things. Things that we work hard with him to adapt and grow.

ANyone else have relatives like this? It's so frustrating.

Re: Do your DC's grandparents "get it"?

Re: Do your DC's grandparents "get it"?

No, mine don't get it either.

I'm accused of having high expecations.

I'm accused of doing this to him because he is a daycare kid.

Maybe now they "recognize" that there is a little something off but NEVER would they use the word autism. I get scoffed if I say it.

It's frustrating because I often struggle with telling people about DS's diagnosis. Most of my extended family don't know. We don't see them all that often so they don't know DS that well.

I wish I could just come out and talk about it but it is hard for me. I hate that because truthfully once I have it out in the open it makes it so much easier on me to not feel like I have to explain his actions.

Re: Do your DC's grandparents "get it"?

My parents do, and I know my mother has been reading as much as she can, so she is probably DSs most knowledgeable grandparent at this point. My father knows what my mother shares with him, so he's fine too. DS is borderline, but they both agree that we should address this seriously and treat it seriously while he's young.

My ILs do not know yet. It has been 3 months, and DH has not told them. I would be angry with him, but I have seen how they have dealt with other health issues that are easier to understand, and let's just say they don't deal. They act as if nothing is wrong and don't want to hear about it. So I think part of the reason he has not told them is that he doesn't want to see their non-reaction--I know in the past it has been very painful to him. All that said, he really should tell them soon IMO, and it does bother me that they are unaware. So I do not know how they will take the news, but I am guessing there will be a quick change of subject and that will be that.