Another husband Question

How much do your husbands help you with the raising of your child/ren?

And i mean the day to day stuff as well.

Feeding?
Bathing?
Activities?
Diaper Changing?

Re: Another husband Question

I do all of the feeding, changing, playing during the day and sometimes the baths by myself also. But when DH comes home, he helps with feeding, changing, and comforting our baby as much as possible. Same on weekends.

Re: Another husband Question

Well, I am pretty much a SAHM so DH really can't do much during the week - he only sees Jack for 15 minutes during lunch. Jack is sleeping by the time he gets home from work.

On the weekends he is very hands on. He will feed him, change him (in clothes that I leave out of course), play with him. He is a teacher so he's off this week - and it's been a little break for me too so it's good.ETA: I would never have DH bath him - I'm too paranoid!

Message edited 2/19/2008 5:32:00 PM.

Re: Another husband Question

my husband is very involved and does everything I do. we take turns a lot.

Re: Another husband Question

During the Day DH is at work so its just me, but ..

Feeding? He does at least one bottle a night and on the weekends he will help out alot.

Bathing? We always bathe DS together

Activities? DS is only 8 weeks so his activities are limited. DH loves to talk to him to make him smile and will sit on the floor with him on his play mat.

Diaper Changing? I do 99% of this

DS is not a nightime baby, he gets very cranky as bedtime approaches. So poor DH usually seems him when he is not really in the mood for fun.

When DS is crying DH always offers to try to rock him or take him to calm him.

Overall I can't complain, I do more but thats because I want to do more...

Re: Another husband Question

I am lucky to have a great husband in that area...

he plays with her EVERY night...

can completely hold his own if I am sick or am out one night...

I would say that we are equal. I am lucky to know that if ever I am out of commission my DH can just step right in.

Re: Another husband Question

As a SAHM the childrens care does fall on my shoulders more than it does DHs...but when DH is home we split things pretty much 50/50...if anything he does more than I do b/c I will use that time to get stuff done either around the house or running errands.

Re: Another husband Question

Wow. It is nice to see a lot of involved dads. I often feel like a bad mom because my husband does half of everything i do. AND I EXPECT THAT. I see so many moms who take on every aspect of child care. I don't know how they do it and keep it up.
I do 50%, ok more, but still at the end of the day I am wiped out.

Message edited 2/19/2008 6:08:17 PM.

Re: Another husband Question

Well DH works 6 days a week anywhere from 10-14 hours a day so when he comes home he's pretty shot. But he LOVES to spend time with DD and tries as much as he can.

He won't bathe her because he feels weird and is too nervous. But he changes her diaper, gets on the floor and plays with her, has conversations with her when she's babbling.

But by far the best thing that he does to help me when I REALLY need a break is take her so I can nap or stay up with her at night until she falls asleep (somewhere around 12ish) even though he has to get up at 5:30.

I LOVE seeing him interact with her.

Re: Another husband Question

I am SAHM. DH works in NYC and is gone for about 12 hours a day. He takes care of the yard, and garbage/recycling. He helps me folding/moving laundry when needed, does a little cooking on the weekends and helps out with the cleaning when needed.

Feeding? I EBF but he likes to give her a pumped bottle a few times a week. We are just starting cereal and he can't wait to be able to feed her.

Bathing? He gives DD all her baths on the weekends.

Activities? He plays with her when he gets home (until she gets tired and gets a "case of the mommies") He tries to hold her and play with her as much as he can on weekends.

Diaper Changing? He does most of the changes when he is home to give me a break and to have a chance to bond/play with DD.

I am very lucky. DH has taken a very active role in caring for DD. By the end of each week she is not as comfortable with him as she is with me so he really plays with her and cares for her as much he can. By Sunday night of every weekend she's Daddy's girl again.

The only issue we are still having is that she will only let me put her to bed.

Re: Another husband Question

DH works in the city and leaves for work by 1pm from M-F. I am a SAHM so I wake up in the AM w/baby and when DH wakes he will help with me w/breakfast and diaper changes. On the weekends I let DH sleep in a little late but he helps out with everything and on the weekends he gives our DD her baths and puts her down for the night. On Sunday he usually gets up early with DD so I can sleep in.

Re: Another husband Question

My husband works and Im a SAHM and sometimes I feel guilty, BUT he is still his father too. Im his mom and hes his father and as far as his care I feel it HAS to be 50/50 , I will not accept any less.

On that note, I do get less and have to nag a lot, but I will not waiver on this....

Re: Another husband Question

Re: Another husband Question

Dh has a tough schedule, but when he is home he is beyond hands on.

He did most of the night feedings when DS was first born.

He does it all- feeding, diapering, bathing you name it.

Honestly having a baby together has made me appreciate him more

Re: Another husband Question

Al wakes up with her in the morning while I sleep in. He feeds her breakfast, gets her dressed (sometimes) and plays. (he works from home on days he's not traveling).

Depending on the day, he'll put her down for a nap and/or give her lunch if I'm out on appts.
I generally take her to work with me around 12ish.

I usually give her baths, and put her to bed. But he does those things too, just not as often.

Re: Another husband Question

I'm currently a SAHM, so of course, when DH is at the office, I'm doing it all unless IL's are over. My MIL always volunteers to help as she knws these are her last grandbabies. He helps get them both downstairs in the morning and helps give them their bottles. He gets home at 4:45 and they are in the middle or tail end of their dinner and are about to start baths. Bathing two is a challenge so he helps with one while I am with the other and we switch off, then it's a bit of play, bottles, book and bed at 6 pm

On weekends he helps a lot but to be honest, after 11 months I'm still reminding him of the schedule/order of things. He has been very helpful from day one.

He had no choice but to step up to the plate from day one since we had two at the same time.

Re: Another husband Question

DH helps with everything. We take turns with everything. He was insulted the other day when I took her to give her a bath and kinda didn't leave his spot open, he was so sad, mumbled " there use to be a spot for me" and forced his way in there for bath time. It amazes me how hands on he is with our DD.

Re: Another husband Question

Before the age of 1, not much. Now, he helps with everything. We needed to find out groove.

He wasn't as comfortable with the baby stage as the toddler stage. Now that we're in the pre-school/elementary school, he's like Mr. Mom, only without as much patience.

Re: Another husband Question

Well, my DH is a SAHD during the day and then he works PT in the evening. It's pretty fair to say that we are 45%/55%. When we are both home, I take care of all of the feedings. DD is definitely a mama's girl so she won't allow Daddy to do much for her if I am home so this is certainly no fault of DH.

During the day, DH takes her out everyday; whether it be to Music class, My Gym, the mall, the Library, a park, whatever. He is great with DD; I couldn't ask for more. He also straightens up the house throughout the day. He does dishes, dusts and the wash. I never complain!

I take care of all of the meals (I often even make DH's lunch so he doesn't have to worry about it) and do the rest of the cleaning.

Message edited 2/19/2008 7:54:49 PM.

Re: Another husband Question

He does everything from the time she wakes up until about 3pm when he leaves for work. He also does almost all the housework. He's awesome

Re: Another husband Question

Well, DH is home with him during the day, but as soon as I walk in the door, he is mine. And all weekend too.

Right now it bothers me a little b/c Christopher still wakes up at night and I am the one who gets up with him whereas DH who is home all day and isn't working sleeps. I do work and work a lot, so I wish I could actually get some sleep, but c'est la vie on that one.

Re: Another husband Question

we both work, but i drive ds to and from daycare, i feed him (nurse), i change him 90% of the time, we both bathe him, we both get his bottles ready for the next day - whoever has more energy usually does it, both wash the old bottles & pump parts, he'll usually dress him in the morning while i get ready since i leave before he does

he has no problem helping out, but i feel more inclined to do most of the care taking...so far, so good

Re: Another husband Question

He helps me with everything, except changing diapers, he hates that--lol

Re: Another husband Question

My DH does a lot. He teaches college and has a great schedule. He was a SAHD from September until last month- and now he is home two days a week with DD. I am usually the one to bathe her, but the feeding and diapering and playing is split pretty evenly.

I feel very lucky to have so much help though I do get a little envious. She grew so attached to him when he was on sabbatical, but I know it's great for her to have that bond with him.

Re: Another husband Question