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Budjeg11
LIF Adult
Member since 4/11 2644 total posts
Name:
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
Posted by Katareen
Maybe this is WHY the kid is so generally good. She has consequences for her actions and her parents follow through with the punishment.
I was actually thinking this as well.
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Posted 5/3/19 5:01 PM  |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
Posted by Budjeg11
Posted by Katareen
Maybe this is WHY the kid is so generally good. She has consequences for her actions and her parents follow through with the punishment.
I was actually thinking this as well.
Not necessarily true. My DD is very well behaved to the point where I can't imagine having to punish her by taking away her best friend's birthday, like i can't wrap my head around her doing anything that would warrant that because honestly she never has- I'm a big softee with punishment and a bit of a push over.
So sometimes, kids are just naturally well behaved
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| Posted 5/3/19 5:15 PM |
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Budjeg11
LIF Adult
Member since 4/11 2644 total posts
Name:
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by Budjeg11
Posted by Katareen
Maybe this is WHY the kid is so generally good. She has consequences for her actions and her parents follow through with the punishment.
I was actually thinking this as well.
Not necessarily true. My DD is very well behaved to the point where I can't imagine having to punish her by taking away her best friend's birthday, like i can't wrap my head around her doing anything that would warrant that because honestly she never has- I'm a big softee with punishment and a bit of a push over.
So sometimes, kids are just naturally well behaved
No not necessarily true as I feel the same when it comes to my kids as you explained. In fact I posted something similar a few posts back. But its possible that this particular child maybe is so well behaved bc her parents are strict not bc she is inherently well behaved. Just possible-- i guess the point is you just never know which is why it is hard to judge. Also bc i am a pushover if my kid is generally well behaved but has one transgression like answers me back or doesnt listen the first time, I dont usually give consequences, but some parents may find an offense like that punishment worthy. Different parenting styles as well as different levels of what parents think is acceptable behavior from their children.
Message edited 5/3/2019 5:31:26 PM.
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| Posted 5/3/19 5:28 PM |
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Adri
Joy!
Member since 5/05 3116 total posts
Name:
A
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
I don't use taking parties away as a consequence for bad behavior, because I usually use consequences related to the bad behavior. Those consequences usually involve taking electronics away. It could be because DS was late because he was using his phone, or answer back when playing fortnite, etc. I'm very flexible though and a pushover, but that is what works in our family, so I don't believe that my DS should stop having fun completely because he made a mistake or did something wrong. Also I'm huge on talking to my DS, warnings and second chances. DS is 13 and has worked so far. However, he knows once I put my foot down, there is no reverse.
Now, let's see what happens now that he is a teenager and when he goes to HS. If he does something wrong at a party, I can see myself taking parties away.
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| Posted 5/3/19 8:39 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Birthday Party Spin-off
We don't do it as punishment but our DD has to earn to go to "fun" activities. Whether it's a party, hanging out with friends, going to a relatives house or anything, if she is not behaving during the week she is not going.
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| Posted 5/3/19 10:11 PM |
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Mrs213
????????
Member since 2/09 18986 total posts
Name:
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Birthday Party Spin-off
I haven’t, but I see nothing wrong with it. Kids are too soft these days and really need swifter consequences. I would however like to know what the kid to warrant this. Tough to say without knowing if the punishment fit the crime!
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| Posted 5/3/19 10:15 PM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
I need to know what she did
How often etc
But it would take a lot for my kid to miss their BFF’s party
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| Posted 5/3/19 11:32 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
Posted by mommywantsababy
Posted by lululu
Posted by Sash
Posted by lululu
Posted by mommywantsababy
My daughter has a friends party tonight and I was super close to not letting her go bc of something she did at home this morning. If it wasn’t rude to cancel the day of, no way would she be going.
There are few punishments that actually affect my daughter though. We cancelled a weekend trip to her grandmothers house in the poconos one time bc she wouldn’t listen though. The car was packed and everything.
Wow - if I cancelled a weekend trip to my mother or mother in laws house as a punishment I think they would disown me. I get needing to teach a lesson but time with a grandparent is precious. That actually breaks my heart a little.
You don't even know what her daughter did. Why don't we hold judgement until we find out all the facts? And even then we should not judge and accept the fact that everyone parents differently.
I know that no matter how bad my child's behavior my mother or mother in law would be livid if I last minute cancelled a weekend away with them. Short of murdering another child there would be nothing I could say that would justify withholding their grandchild from them for a planned weekend that wouldn't get me disowned. And I do think that going thru with that punishment is something that most people would regret in the long run. Time with grandparents is limited, I would not deprive my child of spending time with any of their living grandparents under any circumstance I can think of. But maybe that's because my father is deceased and I would give just about anything for my child to be able to spend just one day with him. To each his own.
It’s a second home in the poconos, and my kids see my in laws daily. Literally, I take them there every single day.
However, thanks for being such a better parent than I. 
If you really want to judge me for being a monster though, she’s also only 4.
Not sure where I said I was a better parent than you. Can you please find that and point it out to me? And I never judged you - I am just saying in my circumstances that punishment would not fly. In fact, my last line was TO EACH HIS OWN. But thanks for doing what LIF is best for and only reading what you want to read!
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| Posted 5/4/19 8:54 AM |
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JandJ1224
Member since 6/06 5911 total posts
Name:
Jannette
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Re: Birthday Party Spin-off
I wouldn’t take away a party because I think it would be hurtful to the birthday boy or girl.
If someone is going through the trouble and expense of planning a party and is kind enough to include my children I make a sincere effort to attend.
There are plenty of other consequences for a child.
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| Posted 5/5/19 4:43 PM |
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