BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents--UPDATE AND NEW QUESTION

Please tell me this gets easier! We tried it last night, and it was horrible. DS cried so hard, and basically had the closest thing to a tantrum I've ever seen him have.

But he just isn't going to sleep on his own lately, and cries and cries as soon as we leave the room anyway. But I still felt so awful watching the poor little guy on his monitor.

UPDATE--well, for whatever reason, he went to sleep pretty easily last night, after about 5 minutes of crying and slept through the night. I was just about to go in there and reassure him, when he stopped. I doubt it will last though--must have been a fluke. This can't work after one night.

My other question--do you guys use Ferber or CIO for naps too? He rarely falls asleep in his crib during the day, and I would like him to sleep there more often, rather than his stroller or the car.

Thanks for all the messages!

Message edited 7/21/2008 11:58:48 AM.

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

It honestly does get easier...but it is very very very hard in the beginning. I feel for you, but my only advice is to try everything in your power to stick with it

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

Thank you! It just seems so wrong to let them cry.

Maybe I should turn off the monitor...DH is tougher, he kept me from going in there too quickly last night and made sure I didn't pick him up.

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

It def does get easier. It's never easy to listen to them cry but once you know that the outcome will happen you are at ease.

The first couple of days are very rough. I suggest taking a shower, cleaning dishes, or going on another floor if you can so that you don't have to hear it loud and clear.

For me - personally - it also helps that I have the video monitor - I can watch him but I put the volume down so I don't have to hear him.

Good luck!

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

It does get easier..i promise! I was one that NEVER really heard my son cry, but couldnt take it anymore adn we did CIO one month ago. It was the best thing we could have ever done. He sleeps through the nite and falls asleep on his own!! (unless his teeth are hurting, then he wakes up once or twice). So take it from me, keep up the good work...try to keep busy during the crying and day after day u will realize how great the whole process is!! LOTS OF LUCK!!!

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

can I ask when everyone started this process? THanks (sorry for hijacking)

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

We're trying it now, at 7.5 months and using the Ferber method (or a quick and easy version of it). Until about a month ago, he slept very well and night and got to sleep easily most of the time, so we didn't need to do this. Teething and a trip to Florida seem to have dereailed him though. From what I read, you can start Ferber or CIO after 6 months.

He's not having tooth pain now--if he was I would still rock him and soothe him. Now he just cries when we put him down to sleep and doesn't try to get himself back to sleep at night.

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

I agree with the video monitor...even though it broke my heart to see him...I have to tell you I wasnt strong at first, and I went in and took him out....it took me a few tries, and a couple of days, but eventually I was able to do it.

How did last night go?

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

How long does the crying last? DS screams/cries bloody murder for a good 15 minutes and then passes out

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents

I was a CIO failure and would rock my son to sleep. Fortunately he transferred into the crib well...BUT...eventually (probably around 10 or 11 months) he wouldn't go down and we wanted to stop rocking...so we went back to CIO and with some determination it worked. The first night was about 45 minutes, the second was about 20 and after that it went to 5 minutes and very quickly to no crying.

When he gets hysterical I give him 10-15 minutes and then go back for him. Probably a weakness on my part but it only happens 1-2 times per month. He gets 15 minutes of rocking and then goes down - always somewhat awake. There is no talking - I hold him, rock him, kiss him and put him down.

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents--UPDATE AND NEW QUESTION

bump

Re: BTDT Ferber or CIO Parents--UPDATE AND NEW QUESTION

My other question--do you guys use Ferber or CIO for naps too? He rarely falls asleep in his crib during the day, and I would like him to sleep there more often, rather than his stroller or the car.

Thanks for all the messages!



We DEFINITELY do CIO for naps too. It makes going to sleep so much easier for them in the long run, IMO. We actually started doing it mostly with naptime. He still is already sleeping sometimes at night when I lay him down, (b/c he still gets a bottle at bedtime) I know, I'm a bad mommy for that but it's such a special time for me to have him on my lap quietly for once. Sorry to hi-jack that. Can you tell I feel guilty for the bottle at night thing??? .

CIO does work for MOST kids and it is a blessing in the long run. Hang in there. It gets so much better.