Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Do you think kids that go to day care are more social and smarter?
Just curiuos.
My BFF thinks so. So much that she just got a job so she can afford to keep her kids in full time day care...she had taken time off for a while but just got a job closer to home. She said she is basically working to keep her kids in daycare (she calls it school).

My DS does not go to daycare. But he is still a very bright little boy.

Just wonder what others think?

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I have no clue, but I have a friend that is an early childhood teacher - pre-k-2nd grade depending on the year, and she says that she can always tell the kids who went to nursery school/day care when they were younger (2+) because they were able to pay attention better and were more organized than a lot of the kids who didn't go to those programs.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I think she is ridiculous.

My opinion is this:

all kids are different.. all kids are born with a personality so to speak.. some are shy..some are outgoing...Do I think being put in social situations can bring someone out of shyness..not entirely.. it may make the more comfortable being there though.

as for being smarter.. no way jose!! I feel like MAYBE..they learn something sooner (dependig on the daycare) but in the end.. they all learn the same thing eventually..just b/c daycare kids are exposed to it sooner..doesn't make them smarter.


for the record..john is in daycare

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I think it offers them a social environment where they can learn and be prepared for school. That's not to say that a SAHM/D could't provide the same educational and social benefits.

FTDC also comes with its downsides - kids can get sick, and most likely, the parent is working so its time away from family.

In all honesty, if your DC was that smart, they might be held back in a typical preschool that has to "teach down" to your DC.

DS started a montesori school this year and he has come out with some random fact that I had no idea he would be learning at such a young age.

Bottom line: depends on the kid/parents/school.

Message edited 11/1/2011 12:28:19 PM.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

No, I think it's a personality thing. My kids are like night and day - DD is way more social than DS most of the time, and I think they are just as smart as their friends in daycare - and neither or them are in daycare.

Kids in daycare might learn/know things more quickly than non-daycare kids, especially in daycare with a school setting, but that doesn't make them inherently smarter, and I believe that non-daycare kids catch up quickly in school for the most part. I never went to daycare and I was usually towards the top of my class

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

That is the silliest thing I've ever heard.

All kids are different. Just as some people can debate that daycare is better for children, many feel that being home with their SAHM/SAHD is better.

There is no right/wrong answer. As long as the children are stimulated, have interaction with other children and are taught letters/numbers/organization/etc., then it really doesn't matter what their physical environment is IMO.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I am a SAHM but I do see an advantage to daycare. I think mostly for the socialization aspect. I always made sure to have the boys signed up for classes and playdates all the time. I think it is very important for them to be around their peers at that age. I think that if a SAHM keeps her child in the house with no outside interaction that could be a problem.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

i will be honest ... i would LOVE to be a SAHM but part of me would feel guilty, taking DS out of daycare. taking him out of that social environment. He LOVES it and I don't know that I could be as creative with him keep him so socially involved if he were home with me full time.

yes, i do think he is better off (in the long run) being in daycare vs. home with me full time.

JMHO

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

it depends on too many factors, from innate intelligence to the teachers to the child.

I think socialization is day care's greatest advantage. my son is home. he is learning his colors, his letters, numbers..he counts to 10 in 2 languages (although he loves "ocho" and puts that number wherever he wants most of the time ) he knows the names of more animals than I even knew existed...but that is all b/c of my MIL. she hates tv and they look at books constantly.

but, socially he doens't play quite as nicely with other kids his age...he's great with older kids b/c he's with my nieces all day long.

so I don't think anyone can say that.

what I will say though, is that anyone can make up a reason to justify their actions...even if that means running away from their kids b/c they can't take being with them all day long but not wanting to admit it.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

No, I don't think enrolling a kid in daycare is going to make them smarter. They may be exposed to more activites that help them learn new things than a child who isn't in daycare, but intelligence is genetic, IMO, not learned.

As for being more social, I think kids who are around peers may learn to be more social, just due to exposure, but I think they also pick up bad habits from other kids in daycare too.

It's a mixed bag and day care has its pros and cons. My DS has been in daycare since about a year old. I don't think it has made him smarter or more social, but I am glad he is well taken care of so I can work.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Posted by maymama

i will be honest ... i would LOVE to be a SAHM but part of me would feel guilty, taking DS out of daycare. taking him out of that social environment. He LOVES it and I don't know that I could be as creative with him keep him so socially involved if he were home with me full time.

yes, i do think he is better off (in the long run) being in daycare vs. home with me full time.

JMHO

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Posted by Ophelia

it depends on too many factors, from innate intelligence to the teachers to the child.

I think socialization is day care's greatest advantage. my son is home. he is learning his colors, his letters, numbers..he counts to 10 in 2 languages (although he loves "ocho" and puts that number wherever he wants most of the time ) he knows the names of more animals than I even knew existed...but that is all b/c of my MIL. she hates tv and they look at books constantly.

but, socially he doens't play quite as nicely with other kids his age...he's great with older kids b/c he's with my nieces all day long.

so I don't think anyone can say that.

what I will say though, is that anyone can make up a reason to justify their actions...even if that means running away from their kids b/c they can't take being with them all day long but not wanting to admit it.

Message edited 11/1/2011 12:57:10 PM.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

i dont think shes right at all. my2yo DS has never been to day care or any kind of school, hes watched by family. he knows all his abc's (but still has trouble with F for some reason, calls it an airplane lol! ) and can count up to 10 forward and backward. hes EXTREMELY friendly and social.

vs

my sil's 2yo DS has been in school/day care for a year now and barely talks (says a few words here and there), cannot recognize numbers or letters, and is a pusher.

i think its all about the time you spend with your child helping and nurturing them. my family that watches DS spends time teaching him sounds, letters, counting, etc. SIL's "school" is just playtime. so IMO, if she doesnt HAVE to work, then i would rather be home and be the one thats nurturing my kid(s) rather than have someone else do it for me.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I definitely see an advantage.
Though I am sure it also depends on the parent. I think if a parent has that "educational" piece where they are doing all the same things as a daycare and taking the child out on social outings everything will be fine. If the parent is going about their own day all day long and the child is in front of the TV then they probably wont learn as much. I can tell you that my dd definitely did very well in a preschool environment. I also liked the balance of me working and her coming home at 3 and then us doing "our" thing. It was healthy and balanced for OUR family.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

There are some things Sienna does well since she started daycare (at 21 months), but I think it mostly depends on a child's personality and learning ability. It doesn't "make" her smarter or more social, it just provides different things (not better/worse) than she would be getting at home and she catches on pretty quick.

Kids at home don't often need to wait their turn for most things or line up and wait for 10 other kids to go outside, follow the leader, etc so it is a different experience.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Posted by brownie

Posted by maymama

i will be honest ... i would LOVE to be a SAHM but part of me would feel guilty, taking DS out of daycare. taking him out of that social environment. He LOVES it and I don't know that I could be as creative with him keep him so socially involved if he were home with me full time.

yes, i do think he is better off (in the long run) being in daycare vs. home with me full time.

JMHO

Exactly how I feel...FTR DD is in daycare 3x/week

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

I think it has to do with the kid.

My kid is a daycare kid and I do feel he's learned a lot there. He plays nicely with his daycare friends and he "knows" them. I've been told he's an excellent sharer there.

If he sees a classmate outside of daycare, he'll get excited to see them and say hi - then usually he does his own thing and flocks to older kids as well.

I think if I stayed at home or had a nanny who promoted learning, DS would still learn as much.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

i have no experience with this as i'm not there yet...but. It's my opinion that it's all about WHAT kids are exposed to and not WHERE. A child can go to daycare & still have trouble socializing...just as a child who stays home may be great at socializing with others.

Keeping your kid home doesn't necessarily mean you aren't exposing them to things. there are playdates, toys, & parent interaction that help to develop a child's skills. If a parent isn't interacting, teaching, or introducing their child to new things, people or scenarios...thats just bad parenting...nothing to do with day care vs. non day care. neither is better than the other It's all in the hands of the caretaker...be it parent or day care provider.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

i LOVE that my 18 month old wakes up asking for his friends

he asks for them at 230 in the morning "chadee" lol. he looks out the window for them! he LOVES daycare.

then again, maybe i should be that he is calling for his friends at 230 in the morning and not mommy and daddy

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

My boys aren't in daycare right now and I do feel that they are lacking some of the socialization skills that daycare kids have. They really don't have any friends. It makes me sad.

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

Posted by skinny

My boys aren't in daycare right now and I do feel that they are lacking some of the socialization skills that daycare kids have. They really don't have any friends. It makes me sad.

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I agree, that it also has to do with the kid and genetics. My mom watches my DS three days a week and she has taught him soooo much..(more than i have..lol!)..I have been told by his teachers in nursury school that he is extremely smart. My husband is super smart, so i think its genetics. I was always just average smart in school.
The funny thing about my friend who has her daughter in daycare is that, to me, and my other friend..her daughter seems spaced out a lot. She may know how to count, but she tends to stare in a daze a lot and she is actually VERY VERY shy. My friend says she loves day care, so maybe she acts differently when she is there..who knows!

I enjoyed getting opinions on this.

Thanks!

Re: Day care kids vs. non day-care kids

not sure that I agree

my son is not in day care but is much more social and outgoing then my friends 2 little children.

i agree with a PP that I think it depends more on the social environment the children are in on a day to day basis.