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Do you "rub it in"?

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OffWithHerHead23
Keep passing the open windows

Member since 10/06

3627 total posts

Name:
Meaghan

Do you "rub it in"?

DS (age 11) is in trouble at the moment for a variety of reasons that are pretty serious. Won't go into detail, but big stuff for an 11 year old. TV and video games have been taken away until certain conditions are fulfilled.

When your kids are in trouble, do you rub it in? DH does. For example, he will walk by when DS is sitting on the couch sulking, when the girls have "Barbie Princess Charm School" on. He will say something like, "Wow, I bet you wish you could watch your own shows right now, don't you? You would be if you didn't XYZ."

I tend not to mention it. The punishment is there, we all know what's going on, I don't feel the need to pour salt in the wound.

What do you do?

Posted 12/9/11 4:53 PM
 

thisisme
LIF Adolescent

Member since 3/06

560 total posts

Name:
ME

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

I will be honest, I do sometimes. If I feel my DD isn't getting it that something's serious, then I will push her a bit so she knows it's not just over and done with just because I doled out a punishment. But if I think she "got it" and knows how serious things are and she was remorseful, I don't do that. Usually she gets it, so it's not often that I push the issue any further. But there are definitely times. Your DH is probably still upset with him and probably doesn't know how to let it go yet.

Posted 12/9/11 8:19 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

It depends on what it is. I have before but if it's something where there is true remorse, then I don't see the point.

Posted 12/9/11 9:23 PM
 

nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

At times, both DH and I have done that. Especially if he asks for something that's been taken away or he mentions he's bored. Then he definitely gets " well if you didn't do XYZ, you wouldn't have this problem, would you?"

Posted 12/10/11 8:18 AM
 

JerseyMamaOf3
Boo!

Member since 6/05

15144 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

Posted by nferrandi

At times, both DH and I have done that. Especially if he asks for something that's been taken away or he mentions he's bored. Then he definitely gets " well if you didn't do XYZ, you wouldn't have this problem, would you?"



I do the same. Although, lately I find myself rubbing it in more because I feel that the punishment isn't clickingChat Icon

Posted 12/10/11 8:29 AM
 

BellaRock
I am all the Me I will ever Be

Member since 5/06

9746 total posts

Name:
She who shall remain nameless

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

Posted by nrthshgrl

It depends on what it is. I have before but if it's something where there is true remorse, then I don't see the point.




This.

Posted 12/10/11 9:34 AM
 

OffWithHerHead23
Keep passing the open windows

Member since 10/06

3627 total posts

Name:
Meaghan

Re: Do you "rub it in"?

There's remorse that he got punsihed, not true remorse for the "crime".... which is failing English, hiding poor test grades, beingdefiant to his teacher, and generally NOT behaving like the fine young man we know we are raising Chat Icon

Posted 12/10/11 12:22 PM
 
 

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