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TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!
Member since 8/08 7878 total posts
Name:
Mama mama mama....
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For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
DH and I wrote this when we were buying our house, and I found it this morning... gotta have a sense of humor when house-hunting!
The Real Estate Translator
Cozy - A box
Needs TLC - Needs to be bulldozed and rebuilt
Starter Home – Generally cozy and needs TLC
Beachfront Property – Look out for seaweed
Vintage Colonial – Hasn’t been updated since the Civil War
Rare Find – Weird layout
Great Investment – Needs to be gutted
Alarm System Included – Prison nearby
Entry Foyer – includes a “welcome” mat
Quiet Block – Average age of neighbors is in the triple-digits
Oversized Property – Buy a tractor for lawn
Low Taxes – Send your kids to private school
Freshly Painted – Don’t inhale
Half-Finished Basement – Ran out of money before finishing other half
Updated Bath – Now includes a sink
1.5 car garage – You and your spouse can both park if you drive half a car
Newer Roof – Cave-ins imminent
Diamond in the Rough – Great house in a war zone
Lots of Potential – May the Force be with you
Move-in Condition – Floors mopped
Owner is Motivated – Owner is broke
Open Floorplan – Um… where are the walls?
Pool is a Gift – Owner too lazy to take it down
Commuter’s Dream – Train runs trough backyard
Easy Access to Highway – Front lawn doubles as exit ramp
Near Schools – House will be egged on Halloween
Close to Shopping – Can rent out driveway to Christmas shoppers
Potential Mother/Daughter – Scary tenant hiding in basement
In the famed ____ school district – Hopefully you didn’t hear about that time…
Message edited 9/25/2008 10:50:23 AM.
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Posted 9/25/08 10:49 AM  |
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Melmel821
Love being a mom!
Member since 5/08 2776 total posts
Name:
Melanie
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
Love it!
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| Posted 9/25/08 10:56 AM |
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Alicia
LIF Toddler
Member since 4/07 390 total posts
Name:
We Are So Grateful!
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
This is so hilarious!!!!!! And so true!
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| Posted 9/25/08 10:57 AM |
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JldDolphin
Member since 1/07 6929 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
 that is great!
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| Posted 9/25/08 10:57 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:00 AM |
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TreAnt427
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Member since 8/06 8652 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:08 AM |
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Tulips915
................
Member since 8/08 6851 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:25 AM |
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neener1211
:-)
Member since 4/07 22952 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
right on the money!
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:28 AM |
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carlowlou
loving my babies!
Member since 4/08 4594 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
so cute and so true!
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:31 AM |
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drewsgirl
My loves
Member since 5/05 3221 total posts
Name:
Amanda
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
so true!
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:47 AM |
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MeeshMosh
last month on leave!
Member since 6/08 4551 total posts
Name:
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:49 AM |
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Kristin616
Member since 8/06 3595 total posts
Name:
Kris
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
that is great!!!
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| Posted 9/25/08 4:07 PM |
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/25/08 11:56 PM |
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SecretMommy09
LIF Infant
Member since 4/08 169 total posts
Name:
Secret
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
So true
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| Posted 9/26/08 12:01 AM |
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TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!
Member since 8/08 7878 total posts
Name:
Mama mama mama....
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
Shameless bump...
With all the house-hintuing threads, anyone have anything they've seen and want to add?!?
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| Posted 9/29/08 12:24 PM |
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Tara77
LIF Infant
Member since 7/07 284 total posts
Name:
Tara
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
I love this! I just forwarded it to DH...
Thanks for sharing!
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| Posted 9/29/08 4:47 PM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
I love it!! So spot on! You covered just about everything. House hunting makes one so cynical about realtor language. Another one I love is "Park like" - I see this often when someone has a nice backyard but it backs up the the parking lot of stores or 1 block off a main road like Sunrise Hwy.
ETA: I reread it again and am PIMP over here. Very funny, it should be published
Message edited 9/29/2008 4:54:24 PM.
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| Posted 9/29/08 4:53 PM |
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HillW9608
Hello Summer!
Member since 5/08 5916 total posts
Name:
Hill
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
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| Posted 9/29/08 8:34 PM |
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MrsD06
LIF Toddler
Member since 9/07 478 total posts
Name:
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Re: For all you house hunters that need a laugh...
HA!
This is great!!
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| Posted 9/29/08 8:39 PM |
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