I just need to vent for a minute

Message edited 12/2/2006 12:36:03 PM.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

I'm sorry! Men can be real babies sometimes.

It sounds like you need to sit down and have a talk about it

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

There are times when I feel like this too.

I am not sure if our set up is working either because I tend to get frustrated and feel like a nag when I tell him I need to $$ to pay this or that.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

can he get direct deposit

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

That's annoying. Does he have direct deposit for his paycheck? He could set it up so that a portion goes to his account and a portion goes to the bill paying account. OR, he can pay his own bills.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

I'm sorry Beth, that stinks!

you should have a set date every month that he gives you X amount of money for the bills. that's how my sis and BIL do it.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Beth,

money issues are really hard. What we do is that Chris is repsonsible for his bills and I for mine. We share some bills. That way, if he doesn't have money, that is his problem.

My mother always told me to keep the finances seperate so that you never have to ask your husband for money. I have kept ot it and it has been working out quite well!

Hang in there!

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

sorry you are dealing with this. We have joint accounts and direct deposit and any other money we get just gets deposited into the acct. I pay all the bills and that's the only way I would have it. It's a good arrangement for us.

Maybe it's time to co-mingle your assets?

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Maybe he should get Direct deposit OR make "HIM" pay the bills and Be responsible for the Bills because it should NOT be all on you. I would just sit down and talk to him, I hope everything works out!

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Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

What does he do with his paycheck?

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

he has the money- he just being weird about giving it to me today- I don't know why???


Do you think Maybe he is buying you a special gift for Christmas?

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

I do the bills too. We both put our paychecks in the checking account (mine direct deposited, my dh-he brings to the bank) and then just pay the bills. We have never separated any of the bills between out checks. We both get "spending money" each week which we get in cash and if we need anything else we use the debit card or credit cards.
This has always worked for us so never of us is paying for one thing while the other is not. I believe THAT way of doing money starts more arguments
Good Luck!

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Maybe the way to handle it is to have him in charge of bills and you just pay the rent.

DH and I handle it that way.

I pay all the bills (which is equal to our rent) and he pays the rent. I know in your case you have more cars than we do so your bills are more than your rent. So tell him you will pay the rent and he will be in charge of the bills.

Or you can join your bank accounts. That's another way of settling it. If he can't pull his half of the deal than that's the only solution.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

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Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Hmm, I don't know. Are you suspicious of him spending the money on something else?


no- he said he would cash the check - but I just feel like I shouldn't have to ask- that he should WANT to give me the money

I don't like paying bills either- but I do it

this isn't about the money- it's about the way he is making me feel

Message edited 12/2/2006 12:26:15 PM.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

I think the best solution then is to join your accounts.

Maybe he's just in a funk. If he continues to get like this then that's what you're gonna have to do.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

thanks everyone!

I think I just need to wait and see what happens when he gets back

and take it from there- I could be totally over reacting - I being overly sensitive about nothing

I think b/c he knows I transfered money to pay for all the monthly bills already- that since I just paying back savings it's not a big deal

when the money NEEDS to be in there- he never acts like this- I am just over thinking the whole thing

Message edited 12/2/2006 12:36:29 PM.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Why does he have to cash it before its deposited? Can't he just give you the check and he can get the pocket change he needs from the ATM or from you when you deposit it?

This sounds frustrating and confusing... we have a joint account and all the bills are 'ours'. This is mine and this is yours would drive me insane! but if it works for you....

DH usually hands over his check and I deposit and pay the bills. But I've never had to remind him about it.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

Posted by -DonnaMarie-

Why does he have to cash it before its deposited? Can't he just give you the check and he can get the pocket change he needs from the ATM or from you when you deposit it?

This sounds frustrating and confusing... we have a joint account and all the bills are 'ours'. This is mine and this is yours would drive me insane! but if it works for you....

DH usually hands over his check and I deposit and pay the bills. But I've never had to remind him about it.

Message edited 12/2/2006 12:52:05 PM.

Re: I just need to vent for a minute

I think you guys are making more work for yourselves.

Why don't you add his name to your account and then just deposit his check in there and you can pay the bills?

I don't necessarily agree with keeping everything separate. My mom actually ave me the opposite advice that a lot of others recieved, if you are married, you should share responsibility for the bills. But whatever works for people, but this doesn't seem to be working.

DH and I just deposit everything into the bank and then I pay the bills when they are due. Its really easy and simple.

Is this an issue where one of you makes more money than the other? I mean, those things change and shouldn't determine anyone's "share" of bills. Dh used to make WAY more money then me, now I do, but we haven't ever chaned our methods on how things get paid.