Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by brownie

Posted by emomma17

Posted by neener1211

Posted by BrinaEsq

Ehh, still my point got lost on those threads- as evidenced by the "bf vs. ff spinoff thread". Whatever. I give up. It wasn't insensitive for someone to post a "BFING IS AWESOME AND THE BEST" thread right after this thread. Enough.

Agreed.

I agree...I kind of just thought that it was poor timing is all. I saw the title and my initial reaction was ... here we go!

Agreed!

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

I want to preface this by saying I am responding having ONLY read the OP.

I am with you sweetie,but I don't feel bad about it in the slightest bit. Before ever becoming PG I thought,no way, BFing is not for me. Then I got PG with DS and thought well maybe I would give it a try. My friend gave birth a few months before and had cracked nipples and all these horrible stories that she chose to share with me. After 24 hrs from broken water to baby and 2 of those pushing there was no way I was BF'ing. He was on formula from day one, he is bright and healthy and most years goes without seeing the Dr besides well visits and flu shots. I have ZERO regrets and no shame what so ever.

2nd time around I planned on really giving it a try, my plan was to mainly pump. I put DD on the boob once and it made my skin crawl. Like you I didn't like anything about it and I had an almost 4 year old on top of it all. I pumped for 2 weeks and gave up. I still have no regrets although sometimes I DO feel like the odd man out. In our playgroup all the ladies BF, but none of them ever make me feel bad about my decision. Bottom line is my body, my baby, my choice and I know I made the right one. People can say what they want, call me ignorant, call me close minded.....research is ever changing. Nothing anyone will ever say or show me will convince me that BF'ing makes babies smarter or healthier. I just don't see it.

I hope you can take pride in your decision and say F everyone else

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by MetsGirl07

Posted by brownie

Posted by emomma17

Posted by neener1211

Posted by BrinaEsq

Ehh, still my point got lost on those threads- as evidenced by the "bf vs. ff spinoff thread". Whatever. I give up. It wasn't insensitive for someone to post a "BFING IS AWESOME AND THE BEST" thread right after this thread. Enough.

Agreed.

I agree...I kind of just thought that it was poor timing is all. I saw the title and my initial reaction was ... here we go!

Agreed!

yup, i agree
that thread really upset me for some reason..
i am overly sensitive about this topic

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

I tried, I failed, I felt guilty, still feel pings of guilt here or there, get a little anxiety when people ask. . .but looking back, it was the best decision for me and my son. He is a healthy, happy baby. BFing was not for me and I'm ok with that

Please don't feel guilty nor let anyone make you feel any less on a decision you made for yourself and child.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Yes, this is a very sensitive topic for me.

I get upset when I hear people say that BFing is a better bond- that my children will have a lower IQ with formula. I think that is a huge load of CR_P!

I also think that many moms stress themselves out to keep up BFing and make themselves miserable- in my opinion, for no reason.

However, I give credit to BFing moms- it was too rough for me.

But in the end, I feel that there is NO disadvantage to FF. My kids are the most gorgeous, healthy kids I know!

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Every mom needs to do what's right for her family - you should never feel guilty or make apologies for what's best for your family. I am sorry that the current trend in society has caused so much pain to so many of you. Or that women on here would - I haven't read the other thread but I get the gist - I've been on LIF long enough to know how these things go unfortunately

I had no interest in BF, ever, and never felt any guilt or regret, etc. about my decision. I will admit that a few times while pregnant to end or prevent an ugly conversation, I would say, yeah... maybe... we'll see how I feel, I might try it. I never meant it, I just didn't think it was worth arguing the point and it's not always appropriate to tell someone who's overstepping that your mind is made up and to mind their own business (like when it's your boss and you can tell her heart's in the right place and that she doesn't realize her words might make you feel bad - they didn't, I didn't care about other's people opinions on my choice, but they certainly could've).

Now that I'm a parent, I don't think I've ever hidden my decision or waffled about my choice - it was the best thing for us. In general, I could care less what anyone else thinks of any of the parenting decisions I make, including this one, and I simply will not make apologies for how I raise my kid or explain myself to anyone - she's an awesome almost 9-month old, has 3 words, and is almost walking and no, I'm not one of "those moms" prone to exaggerating. Do I think FF had anything to do with that? Nope - I'm not trying to say one is better than the other - to each, her own - I'm just saying she's terrific and hasn't missed out on anything by being FF. She's probably better off - breast milk is only as good as what you put in it and I eat like crap ! DH and I were also FF and we're totally fine - maybe that's why I never hesitated.

My SIL has thanked me for standing my ground and being so upfront about it - she shares my sentiment - it's not for her either - but I think she feels some of the guilt and it helps her to have me around for support. I understand that so I get why this thread is helpful to some women on here - but none of you should EVER feel bad about your choices, one way or the other - BF or FF, CIO or not, etc. - you're the mom, it's your decision and you will always know and do what's best for your kid and your family.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by CarlieJLD7

This is coming from someone who has EBF their daughter for 11 months now...

You should never be ashamed of what you do, you do what is best for your family and for you.

Although I didn't do it, I think formula is an amazing thing, It helps mothers who physically, mentally or just decide to not breastfeed.

And honestly... in a world that is filled with formula fed babies... I felt like I was ashamed sometimes and and outcast to Breastfeed... I felt people looked at me with 10 heads when I told them I BF... But I got over it b/c I know it was my choice and the best for my family (especially that I could never deal with making bottles its the lazy side of me... I commend that hahaha lol)

So... never be ashamed of your decisions!

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

meh, do what works for you.

I pumped with DD #1, she only got it for about 2 weeks, but I had no supply and was compelty stressed out over the situation.

I BF'ed #2 in the hospital and did it at home for about a week. It was stressful because we had a 2.5 year old and DD #2 wasn't the best at latching. But I did it and I can say I did so yay! for me.

Now she gets formula. They make it for a reason, right?

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by Momma2Be

Posted by CarlieJLD7

This is coming from someone who has EBF their daughter for 11 months now...

You should never be ashamed of what you do, you do what is best for your family and for you.

Although I didn't do it, I think formula is an amazing thing, It helps mothers who physically, mentally or just decide to not breastfeed.

And honestly... in a world that is filled with formula fed babies... I felt like I was ashamed sometimes and and outcast to Breastfeed... I felt people looked at me with 10 heads when I told them I BF... But I got over it b/c I know it was my choice and the best for my family (especially that I could never deal with making bottles its the lazy side of me... I commend that hahaha lol)

So... never be ashamed of your decisions!

ITA! I am a BF mama but I would never think that I was providing for my child any differently (or better) than FF mommies. How we feed our children is NOT a measure of how much we love them! In no way do I feel "superior" because I BF. It makes me sad to think that so many FF mommies are made to feel guilty or insecure because of their choice not to BF, to the point where some may feel compelled to make excuses
I have a friend who chose not to BF her DS. There was no other reason other than she just didn't want to. Whenever the topic comes up, I always catch her apologizing and/or justifying her decision and she really shouldn't have to do that.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

I EBF then formula fed.

You do what is right for you. Nobody is in your shoes.

We all have our reasons for x y z. But our reasons are justified to us. They don't need to be for anyone else. Whether it's a medical reason, convenience or just because we don't want to do it. Your boobs, your decision.

Aside from Gisele opening her mouth, there are no laws on BFing for 6 months.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by Goldi0218

Posted by Momma2Be

Posted by CarlieJLD7

This is coming from someone who has EBF their daughter for 11 months now...

You should never be ashamed of what you do, you do what is best for your family and for you.

Although I didn't do it, I think formula is an amazing thing, It helps mothers who physically, mentally or just decide to not breastfeed.

And honestly... in a world that is filled with formula fed babies... I felt like I was ashamed sometimes and and outcast to Breastfeed... I felt people looked at me with 10 heads when I told them I BF... But I got over it b/c I know it was my choice and the best for my family (especially that I could never deal with making bottles its the lazy side of me... I commend that hahaha lol)

So... never be ashamed of your decisions!

ITA! I am a BF mama but I would never think that I was providing for my child any differently (or better) than FF mommies. How we feed our children is NOT a measure of how much we love them! In no way do I feel "superior" because I BF. It makes me sad to think that so many FF mommies are made to feel guilty or insecure because of their choice not to BF, to the point where some may feel compelled to make excuses
I have a friend who chose not to BF her DS. There was no other reason other than she just didn't want to. Whenever the topic comes up, I always catch her apologizing and/or justifying her decision and she really shouldn't have to do that.

Jab accepted. Not one ounce of guilt or insecurity here. But since you quoted the term that I specifically used on the other thread, you have compelled me to respond.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by Momma2Be

Posted by Goldi0218

Posted by Momma2Be

Posted by CarlieJLD7

This is coming from someone who has EBF their daughter for 11 months now...

You should never be ashamed of what you do, you do what is best for your family and for you.

Although I didn't do it, I think formula is an amazing thing, It helps mothers who physically, mentally or just decide to not breastfeed.

And honestly... in a world that is filled with formula fed babies... I felt like I was ashamed sometimes and and outcast to Breastfeed... I felt people looked at me with 10 heads when I told them I BF... But I got over it b/c I know it was my choice and the best for my family (especially that I could never deal with making bottles its the lazy side of me... I commend that hahaha lol)

So... never be ashamed of your decisions!

ITA! I am a BF mama but I would never think that I was providing for my child any differently (or better) than FF mommies. How we feed our children is NOT a measure of how much we love them! In no way do I feel "superior" because I BF. It makes me sad to think that so many FF mommies are made to feel guilty or insecure because of their choice not to BF, to the point where some may feel compelled to make excuses
I have a friend who chose not to BF her DS. There was no other reason other than she just didn't want to. Whenever the topic comes up, I always catch her apologizing and/or justifying her decision and she really shouldn't have to do that.

Jab accepted. Not one ounce of guilt or insecurity here. But since you quoted the term that I specifically used on the other thread, you have compelled me to respond.

Not a jab at all!!!! Did my post come off as offensive? I'm so sorry if it came off that way! I was really being sincere and thinking of a PP and my friend who felt pressure to provide an "acceptable" reason as to why she didn't try BFing. I did read the other thread and I guess I used the term you did because it was just fresh in my mind. Again, I apologize if it came off differently. Sometimes when we communicate via email/posts it doesn't come out the way we intend it to when talking face to face

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

I didn't read all the responses, but here's mine.

I didn't BF. It was never even a thought in my head. EVER. I knew basically since I became an adult and thought about kids that it just was not "my thing"
DD is doing just fine. As healthy as can be and thriving.

I give credit to BFing moms, I just couldn't do it.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Water broke..got to hospital, hooked up to machines, asked the age old..."Are you going to breastfeed?" Responded with an.."I haven't decided yet."

The nurses told me I needed to hurry and make the decision...

Baby arrived, and still no decision, so I opted for formula. He spit up, and literally, the Nipple Nazi of a lactation consultant was there telling me he spit up because I didn't BF.. ...and I bought it...thus baby was latched on the boobie...sucking away and I was not a happy new mommy...brought him home, with formula AND my engorged boobies, sat for 1st feeding at the boob at home.... and enjoyed not a moment of it..

it was weird, and I was done, but continued for a little while...DH didn't really want me to either, likely because I didn't look happy so the decision was made and that was that.

took him to first ped appt, and explained the feeding issue that I had, ped said he had 5 kids, and he didn't once recommend his wife to BF...though he told me he has to tell me that "Breast is Best"...

So I agree with you 100%. There are way more posts on BFing than there are on FFing, and this should not start any drama...you have 4 pages of women feel very similar to the way you did regarding the topic.

I also need to tell you though your dignity kind of goes out the window when you deliver a baby under a giant florescent light, legs spread, with doctors and nurses running around...I was WAY more appalled at the nurse fondling my milk makers too :)

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

For the record. . .

I love/d my time bonding with Joey while feeding with a bottle. We looked at each other just the same while I BF for a month except what changed about it was that, Mommy was more comfortable which made everything easier, more pleasurable for all. I still enjoy our nighttime routine with the bottle rocking in his chair. He still looked up at me directly in the eyes. He still grabbed for my face. I still held him the same as I did while BF. He still screeches for his food & I can't get over to him fast enough with the bottle. I didn't have any less emotion/bonding with him while giving him a bottle then I did for that month of BFing. SO my point, we all had the same bonding experience no matter how we fed.

Message edited 10/15/2010 10:52:49 PM.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by Sweets13

Posted by nov04libride

I really resent it when people also say that the BF bond is like no other.

is what I do when I hear or read that comment. I carried my child for 9 months. WE bonded.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

good for your. I seriously couldn't stand the way that the nurses seemed to push it...... I originally planned to soley pump..... but then ds was born and unexpectely was in the icu that i let the nurses convince me to bf because he was sitting in an incubator(i'm crying now just remembering how he was hooked up to the tubes) and he looked so weak even though the preemie was 7 1/2 lbs..... when i didn't get to the overnight feedings I was pumping like crazy and the nurses were cheering me on that it was so much......
sure enough on the 10th day of anitibiotics he got to come home, and that was it for bf since i didn't have a lactation nurse helping me out like in the nicu, then pumping gradually slowed up. honestly stopped alot sooner than I thought I would, but justified it to myself cause he got that early thicker stuff.

Re: I want to get something off my chest about formula feeding UPDATE

Posted by nov04libride

I really resent it when people also say that the BF bond is like no other.