If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Does he or did he do any of the (weeknight) night time feedings?

Dh gets up for work at 5am, so I was okay with doing those early am feedings, since I had no work. Now DS is STTN, so it doesn't matter...but my neighbor was shocked by this. She told me that she made her hubby get up and do every feeding before work....am I crazy?

I know everyone has a different situation, but was I too easy on DH..I don't think it would have been fair..KWIM?

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I am EBF so DH had not fed DD at all yet!

Honestly, for me it doesn't make sense to have him do the feeding. I am going to wake up anyway when I hear her cry. It takes too long to get a bottle ready. I'd rather just get up, feed her, and go back to bed!

Believe me, DH helps out with DD in so many other ways, this is not even an issue for me!

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Posted by jerseypanda

I am EBF so DH had not fed DD at all yet!

Honestly, for me it doesn't make sense to have him do the feeding. I am going to wake up anyway when I hear her cry. It takes too long to get a bottle ready. I'd rather just get up, feed her, and go back to bed!

Believe me, DH helps out with DD in so many other ways, this is not even an issue for me!

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

With DS I did the same as you. I couldn't see making DH get up when he had to go to work and I didn't.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Posted by MAC222

Posted by jerseypanda

I am EBF so DH had not fed DD at all yet!

Honestly, for me it doesn't make sense to have him do the feeding. I am going to wake up anyway when I hear her cry. It takes too long to get a bottle ready. I'd rather just get up, feed her, and go back to bed!

Believe me, DH helps out with DD in so many other ways, this is not even an issue for me!

Exactly! I hate when people make you feel like you are crazy!

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

when I was on leave and DH went back to work, I did the nighttime feed.

Thankfully we don't have a nighttime feed anymore but I did bedtime, DH does dream feed and we alternate mornings

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

For the first month we alternated the night time feedings since ds was getting up twice a night. By 4 wks ds was sleeping 6 hour stretches so we didn't have to do it long. Do whatever works for you and your dh pay no attention to the peanut gallery :)

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

It depends.... I just finished feeding DD and am waiting for her to fall asleep before I go to bed. If she gets up at 6 AM, DH will feed her before work. But, if she gets up at 4:30, I'll do it... She is really very unpredictable.... sometimes she'll go 4 hours, once 7 at night.
I LOVE when she gets up when DH does...its perfect!

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I usually do all the feedings... even when DH took the first week off to stay at home with his new family. It just worked out that way. DS sleeps majority of the night... gets his last feeding at abour 1130ish...in which we are both awake so that is either one of us... Then usually the next is at 6am... Dh leaves for work at 740... so to have him wake up just to go back to bed is pointless, speically since I'm not working. Things may have to be worked out once I get a job...IF I get a job... lol... but I really love spending time with DS regardless of my lack of sleep... guess I'm still haed over heals with him...

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Usually I'd take them but since I'm on bedrest (fat chance of that!) DH has been doing the overnight feedings for the past 3 weeks.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I do all of the night time feedings and all the binky drops and any other reason DS gets up in the middle of the night lol

Every once in awhile he tries to get up and help and I make him go back to bed since he had to work all day and I dont. But on the weekends we take turns

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

when i was home and he was working no and i didn't expect it. i did BF though. he has to be on a 5am train. to me it's just different. now that i had to go back to work this time he did pitch in a lot more b.c we both work f/t. i found it harder to be sleep deprived while i had to do my job than when i could stay home and be in sweats or "rest" when it was naptime. my sister's DH though helped every night with their 5 kids and he works the same hours as my DH. guess it just depends on what you can do or expect..
ETA DH helped on the weekends

Message edited 2/26/2010 6:31:12 AM.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

DH did none of them.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

yes DH did...he usually got up a bit earlier than his normal work wake up time to do the later night feeding (like 5am ish) which allowed me to sleep later in the morning.

when DS first came home, DH would stay up late with him and do the midnight feeding and I would go to bed earlier so I could do the 3 and 6 feedings.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I BF but Dh did do some of the rocking and care at night. There was nothing that he was doing at work that was more tiring than taking care of an infant all day. So yes, he helped out. And never complained.. he liked it.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I did most of them but, if I needed it, DH would do them.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

we split the night feedings. i take one, he takes one. we alternate each night as to who gets the early and who gets the late.

i have a 19mo as well and running after him is exhausting. i don't get to nap during the day so whatever sleep i get, i get at night

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

It depends.... I would normaly get up and do most of the feedings, but if i'm exhausted and need to rest, i made him get up and do it. Just because he went to work, I worked all day taking care of 2 kids and sometimes moms need a break too.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

i did the middle of the night feeds until he started STTN around 8wks.

Then DH always took the last feeding of the night (around 11) and I did the 6-7am.

NOW that he's sleeping longer, DH still does the night feed and then his sitter feeds him the AM bottle. I drop him off at 9 and he's almost always still sleeping.

Message edited 2/26/2010 7:37:25 AM.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

DD started STTN at 9 weeks.

However, when she was still waking around 11pm and 3am, for a bottle, DH would take the 11pm feeding before going to bed so I could sleep. I would take the 3am feeding (sometimes it was 2am), and then DH would take the 5 or 6 am feeding so I could sleep until her next bottle which was usually around 8:30/9:00am (she would go back to sleep after the early morning bottle).

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

When I was home on leave my DH did ONE night feeding. His exscuse was he was working all day (physical labor) and I was home all day. I was not very happy with that.

Now he is actually home bc he got laid off and DS usually STTN but if he is up for any reason we have an understanding that DH will get up with him since I have to get up for work.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I bottle fed, but DH almost never did night time feedings when I was on leave and he was working. I didnt feel like it was fair becuase he had to work all day whereas I could relax a bit when the baby slept.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

when i was on leave i did most of the nite bottles/changings. There were nites where DH would stay up so i could sleep a few hours. but most nites i did it.

by the time i went back to work DS was sleeping through the nite. but DH would give him the last bottle before bed.

whatever works for household..i wouldnt care what my neighbors said.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

When I was home on mat leave I would do all the night time stuff...he was working, my feelings were that I could always have a nap in the daytime if I needed it, he couldn't!!

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

EBF here, but DH used to get up & do diaper changes & give me company. Not by me asking...he just did this on his own because he wanted to.