Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I never asked DH to do any of the weeknight feedings (whether I was on maternity leave or not). He works long hours and his job is really stressful. Not to mention I don't want him falling asleep on the Belt Parkway every day.

When DD was not STTN, I had him do late night feedings on weekends only.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I was Bfing and pumping, so I had to get up regardless. But I would not have made him do any feedings since he leaves the house very early. I was able to sleep later in the day.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I am on maternity leave & DH has to get up for work at 5 am & he's out the door by 5:30 am .. there is no way that I would expect him to get up for any of the night feedings/changes/crying fits during the work week. He does help out on the weekends & I am glad that I get that time as a "break"

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

What we did, since DS were FF, was DW would take the weekday night feedings, and I would do the weekend feedings. That way, I was at least semi-conscious at work, and she could get a little break on the weekends.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I didn't ask him to until the week before I went back to work, so we could both get used to it.

for ME, I couldn't do that to him. I thought that would have been a ****** thing to do.

ETA: once I was able to bf my son during the night, it was a moot point...so dh only had to wake up for a short period of time. I still wake up at least twice during the night for feedings.

Message edited 2/26/2010 8:52:30 AM.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I didn't have this issue because DH had 3 months of paternity leave right along with my maternity leave so we alternated.

If that hadn't been the case, I would have let him sleep when we had our first child because I would be able to sleep when the baby slept.

However, that goes out the window with number two since you have another one who has a completely different schedule and there is very little chance of you catching up on sleep during the day. So, FOR US, I would think that with the second one, DH would have to pitch in or mommy would have a mental breakdown or die of sleep deprivation.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I must be the worst wife in the world then because DH and I always alternated feedings. We had a schedule. We were both miserably tired and I remind him of this every time he says he wants another baby.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I BF so it was basically a moot point also when DD was waking up in the middle of the night to eat. He would, however, change her diaper before I would feed her.

Message edited 2/26/2010 9:11:17 AM.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

DH would usually do at least one of the late night/early morning feedings. I was incredibly grateful for that. Yes, DH was working all day. But I rarely if ever got a break when he was gone during the day. I never really had a chance to nap, and was lucky if I could get a meal in for myself or a cup of coffee. DS was just one of those newborns who was always hungry and didn't sleep much in the beginning.

It's whatever works for you though. I have plenty of friends who did the majority of feedings themselves.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I'm a SAHM and I have always done the nighttime stuff. DH works 12 hours a day and needs to sleep. I give him that. Unless its a horrendous night, I let him sleep.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

When DS was 2 days old, DH said to me "You have to get up b/c I am not doing it anymore"

So, yes, I did all the nighttime feedings.

Even when I went back to work and DS was 5 months old, I still did them, DH works nights, so no one was home and even on his nights off, I did them.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I EBF and pump. On weekends DH would get up to give DS a bottle and let me sleep. On weekdays I woudl always wake up and let DH sleep. DS started STTN recently(I hope this lasts) so it doesnt mater anymore.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

At that stage...yes. We shared the nights....I would sleep from 10-4, and then he would sleep from 4-8 when he had to get up for work.
The way I saw it, we were both working, even though I was home all day long. And I needed a break once in a while!
She started STTn pretty early on, so it didn't last for too long.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

DD did NOT sleep at night till she was like 8 weeks old. She was literally up 11-4 every night, usually crying. So, we shared the time...I was usually so worn out from dealing with her all day that he would take her for a good portion of the night.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

I EBF so DH never fed DS. If he was FF, I'd still probably do the nighttime feedings while I was on maternity leave.

Re: If you are still home on maternity leave, and DH is working...

Never Ever. Except 1x when they were both hysterical and I could not calm them myself. And he b!tched about it the whole time.