Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

So I've been friendly with this one girl for a few years. I have actually known her husband for years and we've reconnected after we had kids. Anyway, I try constantly to make plans with her (our kids are close in age). Forget about answering the phone, I don't think we have spoken in the 5 years that I've known her. And when I text her she gets back to me usually the next day. Now I know we are all busy. But when it takes you 18 hours to respond to a text you usually get the hint. And the best part is that our husbands talk almost daily on the phone and go out often for drinks after work. We as a family get invited to bbqs and birthday parties and she's nice when I see her but there's no interest in being closer. Anyway I guess this is more of a vent. Is anyone else on the same boat as me??? I'm starting to think its me with the problem. And do people not speak on the phone anymore???

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I'd branch out and not put all your eggs in one basket. Are you a sahm? You can make small talk with people at the library, kids classes, parks. You can tell if they're interested in talking right away.

A big one for me is meetup.com. I'd join a mom group.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I can't make mom friends.

We will go out on a maximum of two playdates and then the excuses come. Or I'll find that I'm always the one making the playdates. So yes, I get the hint and am just friendly at pick up. It must be me as well. Lol.

I'm uncomfortable talking on the phone in general, and will hardly ever make phone calls that aren't necessary. But a coffee date? I'm down for it.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I have found it's much easier to make new mommy friends once your kids are in school. It was so much more difficult when my DD was younger but now that she's in 2nd grade it's been different. There is more common ground with the moms in the school and we're all in the same community doing the same things so it makes becoming friendly so much easier.

I met a few great women when my DD was in Kindergarten and even though the kids are finishing up 2nd grade now and in different classes we've remained good friends and talk and get together both with the kids and outside of them.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

My DD is 4 and has been in nursery school for 2 years. While I am friendly with them, I found the moms in her class to be cliquey. I'm hoping once she gets to Kindergarten and beyond it will be easier since we are all in the same area.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Don't take it too personally. Maybe it's her, not you.

I know myself, I shy away from getting too close with other moms. It's more social awkwardness, shyness, than anything else. I am just more of a loner, I prefer being alone or with my own family than with others.
I have ZERO interest in making friends with the mom's of my DD's friends.

I also HATE HATE HATE talking on the phone. I am very good with texting- I'll get back to you super fast, I will go back and forth with you for hours, but I hate the phone.

So maybe that's just how she is....nothing personal against you, you know?

Message edited 6/16/2016 3:27:36 PM.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Don't take it personally.

I know I am not looking to make friends. I am sociable to people at parties etc but I have zero interest in getting together with other moms. I already have my friends and I barely have enough time for them so I wouldn't spend too much time on it if I were you.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Maybe that's the kind of person she is. I'm the same way, I don't usually text back right away and have always been like that (my sisters always complain about it) but it's not because I don't wanna text back, it's because I get busy with so many things I usually have going on every day. If she doesn't give u other hints, I wouldn't take it personal.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I am not a phone person at all. I prefer to text.

As for meeting other moms, I have made so many friends through my kids' school!

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I think making mom friends is a lot like dating... You just have to get lucky and find a few you really hit it off with.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Posted by PennyCat

I think making mom friends is a lot like dating... You just have to get lucky and find a few you really hit it off with.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I hate talking on the phone.

We made a lot of friends when my older child started preschool. These families live close in proximity and have kids that are the same age and are friends. We see the same people at school events, birthday parties, pools and randomly at playgrounds and stores. Most of our plans are made the day of or week of.

I find that we hang out with people where everyone gets along - dads, moms and kids.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I have no interest in making mom friends but I get how it would be hard. The moms I run into at daycare pickup/drop off seem like straight up b!tches.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Don't take it personally. I'm not a mom yet and I have no interest in making friends other than the big group of friends we have had since middle school. It's just me and how I feel. I wouldn't take it personally. Like others said, try other local things, my gym, park etc.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I'm friendly with a lot of moms that have kids my sons age but it's hard to be friends. I would like to be closer with them, but I often find that we don't have much in common except our kids. A lot of the time too I have opposite schedules as them, because I work part time. Some of them work full time and some stay at home so I'm kind of in between both groups and it's difficult.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Mom friends and friends for DD... I just feel lost and lonely. I love my mom and spending time with her, but DD and I both need some friends.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

You can try meetup.com groups, or see if there are local FB moms groups.

I don't have a lot of mom friends at all. I think for me especially it is hard because I have a special needs DS so it's not like I can go on regular playdates.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

My biggest problem is my age, most of my friends have 4-5 year olds already if not older. Makes sense since it took me 4 years to get pregnant. The people I know with 1 year olds or babies I babysat for when they were kids. I love them but they don't see me as a friend. I also cut myself off from friends with kids when I hit the 3rd year of no child. I just couldn't handle it anymore, so a lot of it is on me. DH works away from home which makes it harder because we often have to turn down invitations as a family.

Message edited 6/17/2016 9:09:24 AM.

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I made mom friends 1st through my town's Mom Club. Then I met more people when my dd started taking classes- music together, little gym and pre-school.
Some moms I clicked w and we have play dates and others I'm just friendly w at pick up.

Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

Making friends as an adult is hard. It takes a lot of energy. My girlfriends some have kids and some don't I love because they already know.me aND my life. There are no hurt feelings if some one can't make it to some thing.

Many people I meet aren't friendly though or aren't looking for friendships or have a totally different parenting technique then I do. I can't get my head around helicopter parenting and that's what I see at every park or party I attend.

I hope.dd finds the life.long friends I have and hopefully I'll make née friends with theirs parents. It's actually one of my biggest hesitations of moving. I need to go.out with girlfriends to vent and stay sane i.don't know what I would do.without the ones I have

Re: Is making mom friends hard for anyone else?

I have a very close knit group of girlfriends. We grew up together--we are like sisters. We are all moms with kids all close in age so we always have playdates. I also get together with my coworkers and their kids. If I didn't have them, I'm not sure how I'd make mom friends because DD isn't in school yet and I work.