| Posted By |
Message |
| Pages: 1 [2] 3 |
nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
What's a DINK? I haven't been called that yet 
|
Posted 7/27/06 4:39 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by nov04libride
What's a DINK? I haven't been called that yet
Dual Income No Kids
Even my dentist calls me a DINK. Yes, my dentist asks me when I'm having a kid too.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:42 PM |
| |
|
Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
MY best friend does not want to have children
i have heard MANY MANY people critizise people like this, calling them selfish and self centered
I say that it is better to make the right decision for the COUPLE....not what other people think or what one thinks they are expected to do
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:44 PM |
| |
|
evenedan
Need a little sunshine
Member since 9/05 3843 total posts
Name:
D
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
DH and I are back and forth on this, most likely we will have one child and will start TTC in a year or more. Leaning towards more. But if kids are not meant to be for us, I could thoroughly enjoy life as Mr. and Mrs. DINK.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:45 PM |
| |
|
nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by Blazesyth
Posted by nov04libride
What's a DINK? I haven't been called that yet
Dual Income No Kids
Even my dentist calls me a DINK. Yes, my dentist asks me when I'm having a kid too.
Guess I should be glad mine just asks if I am PG for the xrays. 
DINK! I do love being the DINKs though! Great vacations!
Message edited 7/27/2006 4:46:14 PM.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:45 PM |
| |
|
Lanabean
Yoginis
Member since 11/05 9202 total posts
Name:
Lana
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
my mom always teases us and says that she adores us, but if they were DINKS my dad would have hair and my mom would have more Coach bags. They're teasing! But they're not wrong!
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:47 PM |
| |
|
MrsMerlot
Unconditional Love
Member since 4/06 6005 total posts
Name:
Chrissy
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I can't wait to get 1000 posts so I can change my name to DINK!
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:47 PM |
| |
|
evenedan
Need a little sunshine
Member since 9/05 3843 total posts
Name:
D
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
When people ask why we are not having children yet, I always say, "Cause I'm not ready for my life to be about anyone but ME." That usually shuts them up and appalls them.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:48 PM |
| |
|
Waste06
Waste not, want not
Member since 6/06 7219 total posts
Name:
Lois Mom Mommy Mama Ma
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
We're not planning on having children right now or anytime soon. As for what the future holds, well we'll have to wait and see. DH and I just aren't ready for that amazing responsibility... definitely not financially ready that's for sure.
We know we're not ready. We both accept that. Five years from now I might be telling a different story, but for now, no plans for kids.
I don't feel too bad feeling this way because DH feels the same way. And at the end of the day, what matters most is that we're on the same page, regardless of what everyone else may think.
But if I got pregnant tommorrow, I'd embrace motherhood 100%, without a doubt.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:51 PM |
| |
|
Summer05
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 2320 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by Erin0602
We're not planning on having children right now or anytime soon. As for what the future holds, well we'll have to wait and see. DH and I just aren't ready for that amazing responsibility... definitely not financially ready that's for sure.
We know we're not ready. We both accept that. Five years from now I might be telling a different story, but for now, no plans for kids.
I don't feel too bad feeling this way because DH feels the same way. And at the end of the day, what matters most is that we're on the same page, regardless of what everyone else may think.
But if I got pregnant tommorrow, I'd embrace motherhood 100%, without a doubt.
I could not have said it better myself!
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:52 PM |
| |
|
Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by evenedan
When people ask why we are not having children yet, I always say, "Cause I'm not ready for my life to be about anyone but ME." That usually shuts them up and appalls them.
I want to say "When you are going to carry the kid, pay for college, and provide free child care, let me know. Then we'll get started"
But my husband put a stop to that one. Sigh.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:52 PM |
| |
|
Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
we were just talking about this last night
when we first got engaged- the age was 32
last night the age went up to 35
we have so much fun just us- going boating or picking up and going to the hamptons or snow boarding
we both still have big things we want to buy- and we feel like we are selfish now
I just don't feel it- it's strange b/c I did before my Mom got sick- and I know alot of girls who lost there Mom's feel the same way- but I feel like I have no one to learn from and to help me-
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:54 PM |
| |
|
Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by Beth1210
I just don't feel it- it's strange b/c I did before my Mom got sick- and I know alot of girls who lost there Mom's feel the same way- but I feel like I have no one to learn from and to help me-
I never thought of it that way, but that is a good theory. I lost my mother when I was 18. I don't remember having a preference either way, but not many people have a preference before 18 anyway.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:57 PM |
| |
|
eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by evenedan
DH and I are back and forth on this, most likely we will have one child and will start TTC in a year or more. Leaning towards more. But if kids are not meant to be for us, I could thoroughly enjoy life as Mr. and Mrs. DINK.
That's pretty much us...but the nonstop harrassment from friends and family is getting old. DH's family is even worse than mine. And all the comments about our ages - he just turned 41 and I'm 31 and we're the only married couple in his family w/o kids.
Personally, I commend people who choose not to have children. There's nothing worse for a child than to think/know/feel that they're unwanted. If you don't want children you should NOT have them - it's not fair to the kids!
|
| Posted 7/27/06 4:59 PM |
| |
|
Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by eroxgirl
Personally, I commend people who choose not to have children. There's nothing worse for a child than to think/know/feel that they're unwanted. If you don't want children you should NOT have them - it's not fair to the kids!
 My DH was told he was not planned- and his parents actually went so far to say that they didn't know what to do and they were overwhlemed
I am shocked he isn't a serial killer with parents of the year like that raising him
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:01 PM |
| |
|
eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I have a girlfriend whose charming mother liked to refer to her as "the accident." She's got more issues than you can count. She's a great person but she truly doesn't know how to be happy. It's a shame.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:05 PM |
| |
|
oakslady
LIF Adult
Member since 8/05 969 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
we are not having kids. there are 2 resons #1 i cant have children.( historectomy at age 18) #2 i have never had a good tolerance of children and i think i would make a lousy parent.
children are not for everyone.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:08 PM |
| |
|
Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I do plan on having children, however I do not judge couples who make a conscious choice not to if they feel they simply just don't want them. If our future does not bless us with children, we are still a family.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:15 PM |
| |
|
MrsS2005
Mom of 3
Member since 11/05 13118 total posts
Name:
B
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I want children one day, but it really bothers me to constantly hear comments from friends and family about when we're going to have babies. It's none of their business. I don't understand why kids automatically have to be the next step after marriage. We didn't get married for the sole reason of having kids. Can't we just spend some time together as newlyweds, just the two of us?
I know my parents mean well and would love to be grandparents, but I hate that they mention kids in almost every conversation.  They were older than me when they had kids. Also, sometimes when I'm out and am not drinking, people will ask if I'm pregnant.  None of my friends have kids and we're apparently predicted to be the first ones to have them. I don't even want to think about having kids until we have a house. I know once we have a house, there will be even more questions about when we're starting a family.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:37 PM |
| |
|
Snozberry
I might steal your diamonds
Member since 2/06 4680 total posts
Name:
Melissa
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I feel like adding: My mother said (quite forcefully) that she wants to be a grandma. I reminded her that she has a son who will probably have kids one day. She said, "What about you?"
She brought me to, waited through and brought me home from surgery and knows there's another one in my future. LET IT GO.
Message edited 7/27/2006 5:52:50 PM.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 5:52 PM |
| |
|
BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I have to say, I am so glad to see that you ladies know you do not want children and are not having them just for the sake of our society. I've seen what happens when people who don't really want children have them, and it's horrible. What a horrible way to live your life and what a horrible thing to do to an innocent child. So I say
I can also say that, as a new parent, knowing that I did want to have children, I can't imagine doing this just because it's the "thing" to do. It is so hard being a mom, and if I never really wanted to have kids to begin with, I can't even imagine the resentment I'd have towards this little human. The responsible thing to do if you know you don't want kids is to NOT have them.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 6:20 PM |
| |
|
giggles
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/05 584 total posts
Name:
Colleen
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
I just have to commend you all on making the right decision for YOU
I am also struck with the number of people in this world who think it is ok to question, predict, insinuate or pressure couples about kids. I don't understand why:
A. They think it's any of their business
B. They aren't a little more sensitive to the issues and viewpoints that exist regarding TTC in the year 2006
|
| Posted 7/27/06 6:40 PM |
| |
|
MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
DH and I plan on having kids. His family is really good at keeping their mouths shut, but my family on the other hand don't because my parents are excited to be grandparents because they are not yet. My sister who has been married for 4 years gets no comments, when I'm only married less than 9 months get the constant comments.
I think it's just rude to assume a couple is planning to have children. I had someone come up to me at my wedding saying they looked forward to August when the announcement of the birth of our child would come (exactly 9 months from my wedding! ) I was told there was a table at our wedding that have bets placed on when I'm going to be preggo.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 6:49 PM |
| |
|
coopersmom
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/06 560 total posts
Name:
.
|
.
.
Message edited 11/5/2006 10:42:33 AM.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 7:15 PM |
| |
|
CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
|
Re: Not planning on having children...
Posted by Blazesyth
And also to a certain extent, I feel that being 'childless by choice' is a hinderance... thats not the right word; I can't think of the word. Maybe prejudice 
When someone in my group needs to work late, guess who gets picked to do it, because "Linda doesnt have a kid to go home and take care of, she can stay".
Or, sometimes the people at my work (including my boss) will make rude comments about it. After I bought a new coach bag, and someone saw it, the reply was "Yeah well, you're a DINK, you can waste money like that."
Or, I asked for vacation time and the boss asked what I was going to do, and I said we were going to take a cruise to Bermuda, relaxing vacation and I got some rude comment about how we can do that because we dont have kids yet. Please, just because you're stuck in the Grizzwald family truckster going to wallyworld in the 100 degree heat with your 8 year old kid, dont take it out on me.
BTW, my vacation isn't approved yet.
I find this a form of discriminiation- here in CA we have an earthquake list of who has priority to leave. When I was single with no kids I was last on the list- like my life is worthless and I have no one to worry about outside my job and could stay as long as they needed me to.
I am having a child now but I think if you don't choose to then you shouldn't be penalized for that choice. That is so unacceptable. You deserve your vacation as much as a family does. Plus who has to say anything about your spending choices- that is just rude. We are overpopulated as it is- not having children is DEFINATELY not a selfish choice.
Message edited 7/27/2006 7:25:40 PM.
|
| Posted 7/27/06 7:23 PM |
| |
|
| Pages: 1 [2] 3 |
