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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
OK...so she had her baby yesterday. C-section at 1pm. He cried so hard after birth that he collapsed a lung. He is in the NNICU and she hasn't been able to hold him yet. She called this am, she was really sad....(I would have been beside myself).
And now I've been sitting here yet again wondering how her ex...a guy who is in his 30's, a doctor in manhattan wants nothing to do with them. He does not know she had the baby, he doesn't know it's a boy..
I just can't wrap my head around it. I try so hard to focus on the positive in life. And here she is with a beautiful son...I mean, is there anything better in life than a child?? I am so happy and sad right now.
Sorry for venting again, I guess I am pms'ing, lol. I've been thinking about this way too much. I was putting Johnny down for a nap earlier and cried the whole time ..
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Posted 3/20/08 12:39 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
awww the poor baby! i hope he gets out of the NICU soon.
she and her son are going to be so much better off without that piece of c rap that she called her husband. although i wish her son was going to grow up with a father and she would have a husband to be there with her, she is going to be MUCH better off without his lying, cheating, abusive a ss.
it is going to be so hard for her, but at least she has her whole extended family to be there for her.
i can't believe she hasn't held him yet. that is heartbreaking.
i can't wait to see a picture. send one if you get it.
she has typically been very strong willed in the past, and i hope that continues now that the baby is here. somehow i know she'll be okay and they will be better without him. he would be a terrible father just like he was a terrible husband. i truly wish she wasn't going through this--i'm sure it's not at all how she expected her life would be.
please send her my wishes and congratulations.
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| Posted 3/20/08 12:46 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by browneyedgirl
awww the poor baby! i hope he gets out of the NICU soon.
she and her son are going to be so much better off without that piece of c rap that she called her husband. although i wish her son was going to grow up with a father and she would have a husband to be there with her, she is going to be MUCH better off without his lying, cheating, abusive a ss.
it is going to be so hard for her, but at least she has her whole extended family to be there for her.
i can't believe she hasn't held him yet. that is heartbreaking.
i can't wait to see a picture. send one if you get it.
she has typically been very strong willed in the past, and i hope that continues now that the baby is here. somehow i know she'll be okay and they will be better without him. he would be a terrible father just like he was a terrible husband. i truly wish she wasn't going through this--i'm sure it's not at all how she expected her life would be.
please send her my wishes and congratulations.
I definitely will tell her!!! You KNOW she's upset if she's calling me...I feel absolutely terrible, I can't believe how sad I feel over all this.
I think this is a sign she needs to slow down and take a breath...
And i don't think anyone should go through this. He is missing out on the best thing in life. I can't get over it.
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| Posted 3/20/08 12:48 PM |
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justthe4ofus
I hate hypocrites!!!!!
Member since 5/05 6905 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
The coldness of people can be amazing!! My dad's girlfriend's son left his wife 2 days after she gave birth to their daughter because he didn't want kids then. He has come around and is involved in the child's life but he is barely there.
Many hugs to your friend. I hope her little boy will be ok.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:02 PM |
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mommy0604
My Son is my world...
Member since 10/07 3270 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
I was just thinking about your friend yesterday as I was watching DH playing hide and seek (their own version where DS hides and then jumps out and scares DH as he is looking for him... ) All the time that I was watching I was thinking how can that man walk away from his child? He really is missing out on one of the greatest joys in life. Whenever my DH comes home from work it's like a celebrity has just entered our house. DS gets so excited and then he immediately goes and hides and then scares DH. His cue for saying he's ready for hide and seek and DH hasn't even gotten a chance to take his coat off. DH calls DS his best friend in the whole world. How can your friend's husband not see the joy in having a child. Sure it's not easy being a parent but every smile, laugh, hug or kiss they give you is all worth the trouble. I hope he lives to regret what he did and then it will be too late for him to develop any relationship with his son.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:04 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by mommy0604
I was just thinking about your friend yesterday as I was watching DH playing hide and seek (their own version where DS hides and then jumps out and scares DH as he is looking for him... ) All the time that I was watching I was thinking how can that man walk away from his child? He really is missing out on one of the greatest joys in life. Whenever my DH comes home from work it's like a celebrity has just entered our house. DS gets so excited and then he immediately goes and hides and then scares DH. His cue for saying he's ready for hide and seek and DH hasn't even gotten a chance to take his coat off. DH calls DS his best friend in the whole world. How can your friend's husband not see the joy in having a child. Sure it's not easy being a parent but every smile, laugh, hug or kiss they give you is all worth the trouble. I hope he lives to regret what he did and then it will be too late for him to develop any relationship with his son.
I feel the same way!
John comes home and its like christmas for johnny...they wrestle, play, and just "hang out" as my DH calls it.
This situation to me is just terrible. I mean this guy knows there is a baby out there that is his but he has completely separated himself from it. And he really wants zero to do with them. He said he would have been ready in 3 or 4 years but not now. Ummmm it happened...you are married and well off...obviously there were more issues but still. He didn't have a dad around, you would think that would be more incentive to be there for his own.
What is really awful is that visiting hours started at 11am for her and she's been up since 5am just waiting for visitors. I know her mom came by at 11 which is great...
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:14 PM |
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
That is so sad. I hope the baby gets better soon.
Maybe someone should tell her husband that she had the baby. Maybe once he sees his son his feelings will change... I hope so anyway. I just can't imagine what she is going through. 
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:20 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by KerriSteve
That is so sad. I hope the baby gets better soon.
Maybe someone should tell her husband that she had the baby. Maybe once he sees his son his feelings will change... I hope so anyway. I just can't imagine what she is going through.
She really doesn't want him to know anything so no one would dare tell him. I mean he knows she is due now, so it's not a shock but still...
He is not a nice person at all. Threatened her, came after her physically when she told him she was pg...I mean he is a person who needs a lot of therapy and she is very adamant about him not seeing her baby ever...he signed documents waiving his rights to the baby too...
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:22 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
Message edited 3/20/2008 1:35:55 PM.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:35 PM |
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vegalady
Love my family
Member since 6/06 4546 total posts
Name:
SNV
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
That is so horrible. Its hard to think that her ex doesnt want to be a part of such a beautiful life. He really is a jerk and he will get what is coming to him one day. I think DH would probably go into a deep depression if he could not see his son. He gets really sad when he can't see Milan or play with him like he wants to b/c of his work schedule.
I hope everything goes ok with your friend and that she makes it through. She will be just fine and so will her DC.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:40 PM |
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vegalady
Love my family
Member since 6/06 4546 total posts
Name:
SNV
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by KerriSteve
That is so sad. I hope the baby gets better soon.
Maybe someone should tell her husband that she had the baby. Maybe once he sees his son his feelings will change... I hope so anyway. I just can't imagine what she is going through.
She really doesn't want him to know anything so no one would dare tell him. I mean he knows she is due now, so it's not a shock but still...
He is not a nice person at all. Threatened her, came after her physically when she told him she was pg...I mean he is a person who needs a lot of therapy and she is very adamant about him not seeing her baby ever...he signed documents waiving his rights to the baby too...
And he is a doctor. That is insane. Wow.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:41 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by vegalady
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by KerriSteve
That is so sad. I hope the baby gets better soon.
Maybe someone should tell her husband that she had the baby. Maybe once he sees his son his feelings will change... I hope so anyway. I just can't imagine what she is going through.
She really doesn't want him to know anything so no one would dare tell him. I mean he knows she is due now, so it's not a shock but still...
He is not a nice person at all. Threatened her, came after her physically when she told him she was pg...I mean he is a person who needs a lot of therapy and she is very adamant about him not seeing her baby ever...he signed documents waiving his rights to the baby too...
And he is a doctor. That is insane. Wow.
YEP!
His practice which just started up last year has since had a drop in clients being that her family all went to him. It was VERY hard for me not to give him a terrible review online, lol. She asked me not to but he deserves it.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:44 PM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by nrthshgrl
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
She has waived all support...crazy I know but she wants to be in no way involved with him and doesn't need his money (she makes pretty decent money). Everyone thinks she is crazy for doing that but I kind of understand her mentality.
His family......lets just say they all screamed at her telling her to abort the baby when they found out. They told her she is ruining her life and that her ex is "just not ready" and she'd be ruining all their lives.
LOVELY in-laws right????? I was SICK to my stomach listening to all of it.
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| Posted 3/20/08 1:46 PM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
OMG that is horrible. I didnt even know that was a possibility from a newborn crying so hard. My prayers are with your friend and especially her son.
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| Posted 3/20/08 3:10 PM |
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Bklyngrl
luvmyfamily
Member since 9/06 5307 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
for your friend and the baby... her husband and his family sound like jerks and she'll be better off without them.
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| Posted 3/20/08 4:08 PM |
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2BEANS
wow time is going fast.
Member since 9/07 16106 total posts
Name:
Tina
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
i pray that baby is okay. Keep us posted please!!! I pray for her and her new baby and i hope she gets to hold him soon. i send lots of to her..
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| Posted 3/20/08 4:10 PM |
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MST9106
My life:)
Member since 6/06 9589 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
I think there is a lot more to the story than we are reading here...its just so sad...I feel so bad for the baby to grow up without a good dad
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| Posted 3/20/08 4:19 PM |
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dandr10199
Grace is growing up too fast!
Member since 10/05 11561 total posts
Name:
Dina
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by nrthshgrl
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
She has waived all support...crazy I know but she wants to be in no way involved with him and doesn't need his money (she makes pretty decent money). Everyone thinks she is crazy for doing that but I kind of understand her mentality.
His family......lets just say they all screamed at her telling her to abort the baby when they found out. They told her she is ruining her life and that her ex is "just not ready" and she'd be ruining all their lives.
LOVELY in-laws right????? I was SICK to my stomach listening to all of it.
I have no words about his family...
my heart goes out to your friend.
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| Posted 3/20/08 4:48 PM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
I didnt see your other post I'll have to look for it but congratulations to your friend. All I can say as far as the birth father is that I truly believe somehow this child will be better off without the influence of him in his life. Sometimes kids have a way of turning out so much better, certainly someone who can be so cold about their own child, whether they wanted it or not, cannot be the ideal parent either. Good Luck to your friend.
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| Posted 3/20/08 5:48 PM |
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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by nrthshgrl
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
She has waived all support...crazy I know but she wants to be in no way involved with him and doesn't need his money (she makes pretty decent money). Everyone thinks she is crazy for doing that but I kind of understand her mentality.
His family......lets just say they all screamed at her telling her to abort the baby when they found out. They told her she is ruining her life and that her ex is "just not ready" and she'd be ruining all their lives.
LOVELY in-laws right????? I was SICK to my stomach listening to all of it.
She is better off without these freaks. I'm so sorry that he's having complications
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| Posted 3/20/08 5:51 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by KerriSteve
Maybe someone should tell her husband that she had the baby. Maybe once he sees his son his feelings will change...
that would be the worst thing imaginable. i hope he doesn't find out about the baby at all. he is an abusive, sick excuse for a man and i hope beyond anything that he stays completely out of their lives.
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| Posted 3/20/08 8:14 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by nrthshgrl
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
She has waived all support...crazy I know but she wants to be in no way involved with him and doesn't need his money (she makes pretty decent money). Everyone thinks she is crazy for doing that but I kind of understand her mentality.
His family......lets just say they all screamed at her telling her to abort the baby when they found out. They told her she is ruining her life and that her ex is "just not ready" and she'd be ruining all their lives.
LOVELY in-laws right????? I was SICK to my stomach listening to all of it.
i think it's a good idea that she is waiving child support. she doesn't need him nor his sick excuse for a family near her or her son. she doesn't need their money and her son won't want for anything. at least this way he can't get any type of visitation or partial custody.
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| Posted 3/20/08 8:15 PM |
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mommy0604
My Son is my world...
Member since 10/07 3270 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by mommy0604
I was just thinking about your friend yesterday as I was watching DH playing hide and seek (their own version where DS hides and then jumps out and scares DH as he is looking for him... ) All the time that I was watching I was thinking how can that man walk away from his child? He really is missing out on one of the greatest joys in life. Whenever my DH comes home from work it's like a celebrity has just entered our house. DS gets so excited and then he immediately goes and hides and then scares DH. His cue for saying he's ready for hide and seek and DH hasn't even gotten a chance to take his coat off. DH calls DS his best friend in the whole world. How can your friend's husband not see the joy in having a child. Sure it's not easy being a parent but every smile, laugh, hug or kiss they give you is all worth the trouble. I hope he lives to regret what he did and then it will be too late for him to develop any relationship with his son.
I feel the same way!
John comes home and its like christmas for johnny...they wrestle, play, and just "hang out" as my DH calls it.
This situation to me is just terrible. I mean this guy knows there is a baby out there that is his but he has completely separated himself from it. And he really wants zero to do with them. He said he would have been ready in 3 or 4 years but not now. Ummmm it happened...you are married and well off...obviously there were more issues but still. He didn't have a dad around, you would think that would be more incentive to be there for his own.
What is really awful is that visiting hours started at 11am for her and she's been up since 5am just waiting for visitors. I know her mom came by at 11 which is great...
Well in 3 or 4 years he better not change his mind because it will be too late then...
He's a real jerk!
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| Posted 3/20/08 8:23 PM |
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mommy0604
My Son is my world...
Member since 10/07 3270 total posts
Name:
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
Posted by browneyedgirl
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by nrthshgrl
Is his family involved? Surely his parents want to see their grandson?
eta. SHe needs to be very careful about what she signs. Make sure she has a lawyer. She shouldn't wave child support.
She has waived all support...crazy I know but she wants to be in no way involved with him and doesn't need his money (she makes pretty decent money). Everyone thinks she is crazy for doing that but I kind of understand her mentality.
His family......lets just say they all screamed at her telling her to abort the baby when they found out. They told her she is ruining her life and that her ex is "just not ready" and she'd be ruining all their lives.
LOVELY in-laws right????? I was SICK to my stomach listening to all of it.
i think it's a good idea that she is waiving child support. she doesn't need him nor his sick excuse for a family near her or her son. she doesn't need their money and her son won't want for anything. at least this way he can't get any type of visitation or partial custody.
I agree.
I wouldn't want anything from that SOB...
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| Posted 3/20/08 8:26 PM |
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CalendarGirl16
Alyssa's Mommy!!!
Member since 7/07 1138 total posts
Name:
Tiffany
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Re: One more post about my friend...I just feel sad right now
wow send your friend hugs from us 
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| Posted 3/20/08 8:26 PM |
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