QOTD: Parenting style and fairness and birth order

Today I realized that a lot of things that have to do with how I deal with "fairness" has to do with the fact that I am the oldest child in my family. My DH is the baby of his family so he tends to favor it the other way. I constantly hear him saying to Damien that he is the oldest when it comes to sharing with Jaidy. I am constantly saying to Jaidy that her brother doesn't share because she never shares with him. Damien has always been a great sharer, Jaidy not so much

So do you think your birth order plays into it for you?

Re: QOTD: Parenting style and fairness and birth order

Maybe for DH but not so much for me.

I am the youngest and was pretty spoiled but I am pretty strict with DS.

DH is the middle child of 3. Even claims he suffers from middle child syndrome. I think he is a little lax with discipline overall.

Could be because he was blamed for everything in his house growing up. Couldn't be his older sister because she was the only girl and innocent and couldn't be his younger brother because he was the "baby"

But I also think his discipline, or lack there of, is just because he isn't home nearly as much as I am and isn't put in the situation of disciplining as much as me.

Re: QOTD: Parenting style and fairness and birth order

No, not at all--at least not in the way you're describing. I am the oldest in my family and I seem to be harder on my oldest DD--she's older, she should know better; etc. etc. Her younger sister is only 1.5 years younger, but I feel that I've babied her much more than I ever did with #1. #3 is only 6 months old, so I don't know how that's going to play out.

My DH is the youngest of three and if I weren't around to rein things in, it would probably be a free-for-all around here! He has said that he's going to be much tougher on #3 because he's a boy and expects much more as a result, but I think that's strictly gender-related and not birth order-related.

Message edited 4/27/2011 10:57:48 AM.