Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I ask because supposedly my MIL made a comment like "there's nothing like your daughter's child".....

And after analyzing it, it shows to be a little true.
Now, I don't know if it's because SIL has been through some rough patches and my nephew has lived with MIL for most of his life, or if it would be that way either way......that's just how I feel.

Thoughts?

Don't get me wrong, MIL simply adores DS and will drop everything just to spend time with him, I just feel like if it was a choice between my nephew and DS, DS would lose......

Message edited 5/21/2008 3:51:18 PM.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I would answer "yes", but technically, it's the exact opposite of what you are mentioning, since my MIL is DW's mom.....

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Without a doubt - although growing up I was equally close with both my grandmothers. To a large extent I think how close your DC is with your mom or your MIL is based on your relationship with those people.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

A little.. only because I see her more often.. but Kaila loves both of them just as much

Message edited 5/21/2008 5:47:32 PM.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Yes, but I've never objected my MIL from being close to my kids. I wish I/my kids had a good relationship with my MIL, but I don't. She is not a good person.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Yes - I think that in most cases it is completely true. Of course, there are exceptions to the rule but my MIL without a doubt - does not have the same relationship that my Mother has with Jack.

She sees him MUCH less. We do so many things with my mom and we only see his mom maybe once or twice a month. My mom can't wait to see Jack on the weekends.

And, forget about my father. He OBSESSED with the kid. I think he's the son he always wanted!

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

yes, but only really b/c my MIL doesnt drive, has health issues and doesn't see him as much (unless i bring him to her apartment). My mom is able to do all that so she makes the effort and really knows him the best besides my DH and myself.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

No, not for us. My parents see my girls much more often, but I feel like my ILs are equally close to them. My older DD adores my MIL!

My ILs only have 3 sons, no daughters, so it's not like they are closer to any other grandchildren in the family over ours. Conversely, my parents only have girls, so they aren't closer to either daughter's children--although they do see mine much more frequently. Does this make any sense?

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Absolutely, my mother is definitely closer to dd than my mil. My mom visits every week and spends alot of time with dd. In the 4 months that dd has been alive, I can count on one hand (with fingers left over) how many times my mil has been over to visit dd. (and she doesn't live far away at all). She doesn't want to give up her golf game to see her grandchild.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

My girls adore both their grandmas! Our families are very close, my parents go to everything my IL's have and vice versa. It's really great.

Neither one get to see them more than the other though since they're both in a different state.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Not at all. They both watch DD during the week, and between the two MIL makes much better use of her time with DD.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Closer in that they see her more & she knows what's going on in their lives because I talk to her more.

My MIL lives in FL. She compensates by sugaring them up & buying them anything they ask for.

They adore both though.

Competitive grandparenting is so sad.

Message edited 5/21/2008 3:44:41 PM.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I would say yes as well---I think in our family it also makes a difference that DS is my moms 1st grandchild.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Both my mom and mil are both close to Ella. They both spend alot of time with her.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

yup - my il's dont make much of an effort to see DS.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I think this is true. My mom watches Sabrina for me and MIL lives in another country.

I do think a lot has to do with the relationship I have with my mom. I lean on her and confide in her so it is natural. Since DD is usually with me, if I go to see my parents, DD goes with me.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

No. Neither my mom or ILs live close to us, so if they did, it might be different. As it is now, they both see her once a month on average. My MIL treats me like her daughter and I'd say she is very close with Maddie.
My mom sees my brothers children about 4 or 5 times a week- she is definately closer to them- but I think that is because of logicistics.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

ABSOLUTELY.

Both live OOS. My parents live breathe eat Josh. Obsession doesn't quite cover it. He is their only grandchild...they are baby making nuts..and their baby is now 17 so they were overdo.

MIL has 2 sons and a daughter. Daughter is very needy and has 3 kids. MIL is very close to them. Lately she's been trying to get to know Josh, but its obvious that her connection with her daughter's kids is very strong.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I'd say my MIL is a bit closer to DD b/c she watches her 3 days a week and my mom lives out-of-town and only gets to see DD about every 4-5 weeks. But when my mom is down, she stays with us, so she gets to see her 24/7 when she's here, which MIL doesn't get to do.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

My parents are soooo much closer to my DC then my Inlaws. I talk and see my mother basically every day. My mom does everything for my girls and so does my step-dad.

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

I do feel like there is a difference from the grandparent perspective in that my Mom and your MOM must look in adoration that their daughters have babies....since, they brought us up

hard to explain...but I feel like it does make a difference

Not so much on how they treat the child...just the dynamic is diifferent i think

Re: Spinoff: Do you feel your mom is closer to your DC than MIL?

Yes, because my mom watches DS for us full time during the week. MIL only sees him a couple of times a month.