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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
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Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I hope I don't offend anyone with this question, but Diana's post has me thinking...
If secondary has happened to you, or did, would you go through fertility treatments to have #2?
I am not TTC, but I don't feel that I would. I have my DS and if we couldn't get pregnant again, I think I'd leave it at that.
Again, I hope I didn't offend, this is just my opinion about my life, but I am interested in the thoughts 
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Posted 11/6/08 10:05 AM  |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I def. would. Unfortunately I do feel that infertility is pretty common and I have no problem helping it along and doing whatever it takes to have another child.
I am an only child and it took my parents 10 years to even have me which is why I'm called "the Miracle baby"  (does that explain anything about me to you lol)
I can just picture a second child in my life. I can see Jack with a brother or sister. I can see the Christmas' around the tree with another kid. The family vacations with at least two children. It's something I picture in my head and would do whatever needed to be done to get that dream to become a reality!
And, the question isn't offensive at all
ETA: I just realized - DH and I have never discussed fertility treatments at all so I don't really know how he would feel about it.
Message edited 11/6/2008 10:14:10 AM.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:09 AM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
For now...we say that we will not pursue fertility treatments.
Who knows if our feelings would change if we were in front of my doctor saying it was our only option if we wanted more children.
For now..we will try on our own and see what happens.
If Lucas is my only child...I'd be okay...he's a pretty great kid 
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:12 AM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
If I have a proiblem getting pregnant, I am VERY open to fertility treatments if that is what I need to do to give miki a sibling.
eta - I REALLY want miki to have a sibling...I will do everything in my power to give that to her 
Message edited 11/6/2008 10:14:59 AM.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:14 AM |
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chikita315
Love
Member since 8/06 7945 total posts
Name:
M-lo
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I think it's too early for me to answer fairly, BUT as of this moment, if we did have secondary infertility I would not seek treatment.
I'm also even contemplating TTC again, but that's another subject.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:15 AM |
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JenBenMen
party of five
Member since 9/06 11343 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I would do fertility and if it didnt work I would adopt...my siblings are the world to me and I would want the same (or at least try to have the same) for DS
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:15 AM |
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bayla
Love my two kiddos :)
Member since 8/06 7178 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
When i was pregnant with DS and having a ROUGH pregnancy, my DH said that he wouldn't want to go through fertility treatments if we had a hard time TTC #2. now that we have him and he's so amazing, we really want a 2nd child and both would prob be willing to forgo treatments to have another
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:16 AM |
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anonMom
LIF Infant
Member since 8/05 127 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
It happened to me 
Had a csection with my son and after 6 months of trying for #2, we started to see a specialist. To make a long (2 year journey) story short, I had an HSG to check my tubes and we got pregnant the next month.
Message edited 11/6/2008 10:18:42 AM.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:17 AM |
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Tine73
Member since 3/06 22093 total posts
Name:
*********
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Not sure, but I think we would.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:21 AM |
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Rycois
Blessed with 2blue/2pink
Member since 12/05 13341 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I would do what I had to - either fertility treatments or adoptions.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:23 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I would do fertility treatments if I needed to. I don't know why, but adoption is not an option for DH. Which I find to tally odd, and slightly insulting, considering that my sister and I are both adopted.  I really can't see myself with just one child so I would do whatever neccesary to have another.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:23 AM |
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MST9106
My life:)
Member since 6/06 9589 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I personally would leave it as that. But then again, if I was actively TTC and really wanted another child, maybe I would look at things differently. I guess you have to be in the situation to honestly answer this.
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:39 AM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I think it all depends on a persons level or want for more children.
I dont think I can answer as I did do fertility treatments to have Noah but yes we are desperate enough ( eventually ) for #2 that we would do it again...but easier for me to say as I know whats involved kwim?
Its not offensive at all btw
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:44 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I don't think you really know what lengths you are willing to go to in order to have #2 until you ARE facing secondary infertility.
I never in a million years imagined I would do half of what I've done in an effort to have another child. But something inside of me just clicked, and that desire to have another child, to feel pregnant again, to nurse my baby, to go through all those newborn steps again, just overwhelmed me. That, and I can really think of no greater gift for my daughter than to give her a sibling.
So while I'm sure two years ago I would have felt the same and would have said I would leave well enough alone, here I am, 2 years later, going through my first IVF cycle. And not once have I regretted the steps I've taken...
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| Posted 11/6/08 10:46 AM |
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FeliciaDP
♥
Member since 5/05 18599 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
While I didn't see the original post, I can say that YES, without a doubt in my mind, I would pursue fertility treatments to have another child. I am blessed beyond belief with my son, and yes I DO know I will be ok if he is all we ever have -- but still having a sibling for Nikolas is truly important to me and I will do whatever I can to hopefully make that happen.
In fact, we are most likely going to be going down this road in the coming months and I am very happy and confident in our decision to seek assistance in order to hopefully become pregnant again  
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:02 AM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I don't think we would, I can't say for sure since we were lucky enough not to have to think about it.
Before we had kids DH and I had talked about adopting if we could not conceive on our own. I still would like to adopt a child at some point down the road.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:07 AM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by Bxgell2
I don't think you really know what lengths you are willing to go to in order to have #2 until you ARE facing secondary infertility.
...
So while I'm sure two years ago I would have felt the same and would have said I would leave well enough alone, here I am, 2 years later, going through my first IVF cycle. And not once have I regretted the steps I've taken...
This is ultimately how I feel. I can't say one way or the other until I am faced with the decision. For now I am not so I say we are not considering it...yet.
And if the day comes to make a decision...whatever it might be I will have no regrets...whether we leave the situation alone or consider infertility treatments.
Message edited 11/6/2008 11:21:53 AM.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:07 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
I am so early on, that I don't think I can answer fairly...
however, I think if we are having issues, its DH.
DH is very much into adopting, the moment we had Josh he said he knew he wanted to adopt....I think that will happen before Leo has any surgeries or anything like that.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:08 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by Bxgell2
I don't think you really know what lengths you are willing to go to in order to have #2 until you ARE facing secondary infertility.
I agree with this.
I think once you have it in your head that you're going to try for another child & you've imagined siblings, it's hard to stop that hope in your heart. From what I've seen that hope will lead people to do things they've never imagined, for longer than they (or I) ever thought they could possibly endure.
Infertility is crushing to witness. I can't even imagine how hard it is to have to go through firsthand.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:19 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by Bxgell2
I don't think you really know what lengths you are willing to go to in order to have #2 until you ARE facing secondary infertility.
Infertility is crushing to witness. I can't even imagine how hard it is to have to go through firsthand.
It is very difficult, but at the same time, gives you a whole new appreciation for the child(ren) you already have. I think having a child already makes it easier to go through the process, because no matter what hell you go through during the day with the doctor appointments, needles, blood and hormones, you can come home at night and give your DC a big hug and kiss
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:24 AM |
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pmpkn087
Life is good...
Member since 9/05 18504 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by Ang-Rich
For now...we say that we will not pursue fertility treatments.
Who knows if our feelings would change if we were in front of my doctor saying it was our only option if we wanted more children.
For now..we will try on our own and see what happens.
If Lucas is my only child...I'd be okay...he's a pretty great kid
This is exactly how Mike and I feel!
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:30 AM |
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pmpkn087
Life is good...
Member since 9/05 18504 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by Bxgell2
So while I'm sure two years ago I would have felt the same and would have said I would leave well enough alone, here I am, 2 years later, going through my first IVF cycle. And not once have I regretted the steps I've taken...
This is how DH and I feel. We are 'never say never' types of people.
Good luck, Beth
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:37 AM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
If you had a child without IF the first time around...why would you need it for the second time around? I really dont know what the answer is....
Does this really happen? I havent started TTC #2 so I havent thought much about it.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:45 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by PrincessP
If you had a child without IF the first time around...why would you need it for the second time around? I really dont know what the answer is....
Does this really happen? I havent started TTC #2 so I havent thought much about it.
Yes, it does happen, particularly for women who have their first child in their twenties and then TTC again when they hit their 30's. Our bodies go through significant, hormonal changes as we head into our 30's, which may or may not, affect fertility. In fact, secondary infertility, which is where you have conceived a child naturally prior to experiencing any fertility problems, is more prevalent than primary infertiilty. It's just that not many people talk about it....
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:48 AM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: Spinoff of secondary infertility: if it did happen to you...
Posted by PrincessP
If you had a child without IF the first time around...why would you need it for the second time around? I really dont know what the answer is....
Does this really happen? I havent started TTC #2 so I havent thought much about it.
It is more common than most people know. Many women who have no problem conceiving their first child have problems with subsequent pregnancies. It's not wide spread-I don't want to panic people, but it's a common misconception that if you have no problem with your first, you won't have difficulties later on.
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| Posted 11/6/08 11:54 AM |
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