stubborn Toddler behavior question

So Jordana melts down everytime she has to do something she doesn't want to do. At first it was just diaper changes, now its getting in and out of the stroller and even going into her high chair.

She is very stubborn- has been since in the womb (my breech baby ). We just let her have her tantrum and do what we can to change her diaper/ get her into the stroller/ etc... I have tried talking to her, it doesn't calm her down. I have given her toys and tried distracting her- that doesn't always work either.

She is 18 months old and reallly discovering language. She talks constantly and I am just starting to understand what she is saying.

But if we want to go and she doesn't want to, she will just get on the floor and start to scream. Is this normal?

Message edited 10/29/2007 12:01:29 PM.

Re: stubborn Toddler behavior question

Yep! It's the only tools she has right now to protest! She cannot negotiate with you, or let you know what she would rather do instead. And even if she could, she may not even have a choice in the matter, and doesn't have the coping mechanisms at this point to tell herself, "yeah, it sucks. oh well - maybe i can watch TV/have a cookie/stay home/etc later..."

Re: stubborn Toddler behavior question

Sounds just like my DD.

You sound like your doing everything right - I will say this. I thought the 18 - 21 month stage was the hardest as far as behavior.

Re: stubborn Toddler behavior question

DS is 4.5 and still stubborn.... luckily for us, he's starting to have wants that we can negotiate with (TV shows, toys, etc). However, it's still not 100%. He can spend hours in a corner without any toys. He entertains himself.

But, yes, tantrums and stubbornness is common. They know what they want, but they don't know how to get it, so they react the only way they know how.

Re: stubborn Toddler behavior question

It is normal. She is trying to exert her independence. It is a wonderful quality to have - except if you are her parent!

Have you tried maybe giving her some option - like a booster seat at the table vs. the high chair? Or walking but holding on to the stroller.

I know for us the high chair and stroller were the first things to go - which made life complicated at times (still does) but she is growing up and wants to be treated that way.

I hate to say it - but I think it gets worse once they turn 2. Now it's not wanting to get dressed, putting on her own clothes (when you are rushing out of the house this one is a killer), and the tantrums get a little worse too. I think sometimes its about options and sometimes even comprimise.

Re: stubborn Toddler behavior question

Alyssa is 16 mths and she is doing the same things...I have given up getting her into her high chair at dinner time..she basically eats at the coffee table in the living room while she watches TV The stroller is another battle..sometimes I give her a few puffs or pinwheels to eat and that keeps her busy whole I strap her in. I hope this stage passes soon - its a tough one.