Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

This is something that Ive been thinking alot about lately. I plan on TTC in December so this is just a thought in my mind lol. If I get a BFP I dont think I could wait the 8-10weeks before telling my parents/siblings. I dont have a really large family (at least not close family) just my mom, dad, bro and sister. I honestly think that when I get my BFP I will literally call up my mom the next day and tell her. How many of you would do the same? Am I crazy for doing this? Is it truly bad luck? I read on one of the post that someone wrote they would want their closest family to know because if something were to go wrong they would want them by their side. This is kind of how I feel...if something were to go wrong early on in the pregnancy (God forbid) I would want my family to know and be there for me. What do you ladies think?

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

Once I go to the first appointment and have a blood test and sono to confirm we will tell my parents and our siblings. Everyone else we'll wait until at least 12 weeks.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I plan on telling my parents ASAP but not my bro and sis (especially not sis!). She will tell people and we have some mutual friends.
I may try to wait on telling the parents until my first dr appt to not make them worry about another M/C. I may save them the worry and just tell them when eveything is good to go. It may be hard for me to wait on telling them though.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

i would tell my mom and sister right away bc i couldnt keep that from them and i know they wouldnt tell anyone.

i would however wait 10 weeks to tell ILs bc they are dying to have grandkids and I know if we told them they would immediately go telling everyone even if we said not to.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

i think i am gonna try my hardest to not tell until 10-12 weeks

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

For me the last time was about 2 weeks after my BFP so I was around 6 weeks. There was no HB but the dr said it could have been too early to hear it so I went back 2 weeks later and then found out I needed a D & C.

THis time I will call the dr right away, not sure if they want you to come in earlier if you have had a M/C or the opposite, wait until the time a HB should def be heard.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

we plan on waiting but I am sure it will slip out but we will try our hardest to keep it hush until then. My family has a history of miscarriages.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I told my parents and my family right away. Of course I always regret it the next day because of the possibility of a miscarriage and the fact that my mom has a big mouth and told everybody. At 7.5 weeks (after seeing the heartbeat twice), we told DH's family yesterday.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

nooo i will probally wait a few weeks after a BFP

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I'll tell my mom and one of my sisters right away .... only because i talk to them every day and wouldnt be able to hide it...

I have a big family and id rather wait as long as i can

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

after we hear the heartbeat only then to family.. my MIL and SIL have BIGGGGGGG mouths..

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

we told our siblings and parents a week or so after BFP with dd. we didnt get a very happy response.. not quite sure why (they think 24 and being married and together 6 years already is just too young) people have way to many opinions so this time im going to try and wait till after the first apt at 8 weeks and if i can maybe a little longer. i dont want them to steal my happiness this time around!

Message edited 8/27/2010 9:42:06 AM.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

i will probably tell my Mom only and make her promise not to tell anyone. that way i can share the excitement but if something goes wrong i have someone i can confide in besides DH. i hate to think like that but that's just the way i am....either that or i wouldn't tell anyone until 8 weeks. In-laws we will probably wait until 12 weeks because they don't know how to keep a secret

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I don't think there is a wrong or a right, and I certainly don't think it would be bad luck, it's just personal preference.

I don't plan to tell any family or friends until at least ten weeks. I do understand the logic that if something goes wrong, you'd want them to know and be there for you etc., but I feel differently. I don't want them to get all excited, and then if something goes wrong, have to experience that hurt and disappointment. I'd rather get through it quietly with my DH and spare them the roller coaster ride.

Judging by how excited I get over a smiley though, I can only imagine how hard it will be to keep a BFP to myself (and DH, of course)!

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I honestly think you need to do whatever makes you and DH happiest. I don't think that you (meaning any person) can honestly go wrong either way...its really all relative.

You and I are in the same boat we aren't going to TTC till Dec too. In our personal case, we are going to wait the 12 weeks (to tell everyone but 2 trusted friends) for 2 major reasons.

1) If we struggle getting the BFP, I don't want to be bombarded w/constant update questions nor do I want to her anyone's personal advice on how DH can do things differently to "get the deed done" By picking 1 friend each that we trust not to blab, it will give us the opportunity to have someone other than each other to vent to if there are (God forbid) problems.

2) I LOVE my MIL she is a wonderful person but the woman cant keep a secret to save her life so even if we wanted to tell our families right away but wanted to keep it secret from everyone else, its a NO GO b/c she would ignore our requests and tell everyone anyway. There is no way we could tell my family and not tell DH's so thats where we are left. Also...DH & I just want this to be about "us" for a while. Our new little family. MIL would (like she does w/anything else) make it about her.

HTH!

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

i will tell my one sister right away and swear her to secrecy. I'll tell my parents and MIL and other family after I hear the heartbeat. I'll tell the rest of the world, including work, when I can't hide it anymore and start to show, even if that is after 12 weeks.

not to be a downer, but my co-worker's wife just had a m/c at like 21 weeks and it's so awful what they are going through. I know there is nothing i can do to prevent that from happening but I still want to wait as long as I can to tell work and non-family/close friends.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

With my first I didnt tell parents until after my first appt around 8 weeks (pregnancy confirmed but sono not done yet)
We told siblings around 10 weeks and everyone else at 12.

I will do the same once I get BFP again. If my mom was alive I probably would tell her immediately, however I knew her well and most likely my secret would NOT be safe!

I waited because I saw some friends have mc and have to deal with telling everyone. I didnt want to deal with that. so we kept it a secret. Plus with #1 it was easy to get pregnant ...too easy I thought so I was convinced it wasnt going to last.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

Since this is my 2nd if I get a BFP I will probably call my sister and tell her, but wait to tell the rest of the family until I go to the Dr.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

We told our parents, my brother and our best friends right away....Everyone else we will tell when it gets closer to 12 weeks (and the suspense is killing me!!!!)

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

I'm waiting as long as i can before telling anyone... well, aside from my 2BFFs because they'll just look at me and know right away anyway! No sense in trying to hide it!!

As far as everyone else though, I want to wait. I know i'll start showing earlier this time, so maybe around 10 weeks, but definitely after the heartbeat appointment. I've spoken too soon twice and it's a pretty crummy feeling having to tell a whole bunch of people that you aren't PG anymore

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

hmm. i would wait for HB to tell my parents and oldest sister. i'd tell my middle sister right away. she's been through so many unsuccessful IVF's (and 2 successful ones) so I know she's the one I can lean on during the suspenseful times.
i'll tell MIL when the kid is like 5 or something.

ETA - to clarify, i remember how hard it was for my mom every time my sis went through an IVF and it didn't work. I don't want to put my mom through that if i had to deal with a M/C. i'd rather wait as long as I could to tell her.

Message edited 8/27/2010 2:16:02 PM.

Re: Tell parents/siblings about BFP right away or wait 10 weeks?

idk, i'd like to think i'd have the resolve to wait, especially with how complicated it's proven to be. however, i barely have the resolve to not POAS, so we'll see. i'm really going to want to tell the grandmas.