Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

My MIL has Parkinsons and it is getting really, really bad. She is having surgery November 20th it gives her her life back.

She is living with my SIL right now, and my SIL just cannot care for her needs anymore. She has 2 young children and besides the physical worries (carrying her up the stairs, worried that she is going to fall and crack her head open when she is not there, etc.) she is having mental issues as well. She is throwing tantrums, scaring the kids, its just really really bad.

I can't take her in because I have 4 young children at home. The only single person is my BIL, who lives in our basement, so he can't care for her.

I know it seems like the surgery is so close, but my SIL just can't do it. She fears for my MIL hurting herself, and I have to be honest, I get nervous with the kids, bc when she has the breakdowns, she is not herself. She keeps on trying to take the keys and drive, which she cannot do.

Can anyone offer some guidance? We are completely at a loss.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

I don't know but I wanted to offer hugs and I'd suggest speaking with the doctor or with the social worker associated with the hospital

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

It sounds like she's going to need a more permanent solution, especially if she's going to have surgery- recovery time, etc.

I don't think a respite program would be appropriate here, but it's definitely worth looking into. But you definitely should look into homecare, even if it's just for a few hours a day, it can help your SIL out.

The last resort suggestion would be a nursing home/rehab unit/assisted living program depending on her needs. They are not necessarily permanent (although ALPs/ALFs are intended to be long term).

Im sure other SWers would have better advice, especially ones based in the hospital where she will be having surgery.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

How about having a nurse's aid or private duty nurse to stay with her until she has her surgery? That way she can stay in a familiar place, but you and your SIL can have the peace of mind that she is being watched even when you are not there. They usually live there. If your SIL has the space for someone, it can be a great help.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

Does she have Medicaid?

If so she may qualify for one of the programs my agency provides services under.

FM me if you would like more info.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

Thanks everyone. I spoke with my SIL about having a nurse come in and she does not want anyone else in her house

The surgery that she is having, if it is successful, should almost eliminate her tremors, and bring her back, mostly, to the life she was leading.

She is having the surgery done at Columbia, I will look up a number for a social worker there, and see if someone can help.

Thank you!

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

I understand your SIL's concerns about having outsiders in her house, but if she is not willing to do that, and your MIL is already at risk......it makes the situation really tough to help.

Housing is a process anywhere these days as well.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

Posted by MorningCuppaCoffee

I understand your SIL's concerns about having outsiders in her house, but if she is not willing to do that, and your MIL is already at risk......it makes the situation really tough to help.

Housing is a process anywhere these days as well.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

I would have SIL call her MIL/mom's doctor and say after the surgery she does not have a home to go to. Can they get a hospital social worker involved for long term placement after her hospital stay.

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

I agree about having someone come in, but I think she just feels so defeated at this point, and has her guard up (which I can't blame her)

Thanks for all the advice!

Re: Temporary Housing and Care for someone who is sick?

def calll a social worker at the hospital she is having surgery at