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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Things nobody will tell you
Vaginal birth does not necessarily mean you will no longer have an "intact vagina" and nothing will feel the same anymore. While it's true for some, it's not always so. For me sex didn't hurt the first time after giving birth nor do I leak pee lol. Well now that I'm pregnant again I do but between pregnancies, I had no bladder problems.
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Posted 4/13/15 11:19 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by ElizaRags35
Vaginal birth does not necessarily mean you will no longer have an "intact vagina" and nothing will feel the same anymore. While it's true for some, it's not always so. For me sex didn't hurt the first time after giving birth nor do I leak pee lol. Well now that I'm pregnant again I do but between pregnancies, I had no bladder problems.
This, I'm on baby #4 all vaginal so far..I've never had a urine issue  and everything has always gone back to normal relatively quick.
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| Posted 4/13/15 11:38 AM |
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hopingforbaby
We made a wish & you came true
Member since 2/10 2695 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by ElizaRags35
Vaginal birth does not necessarily mean you will no longer have an "intact vagina" and nothing will feel the same anymore. While it's true for some, it's not always so. For me sex didn't hurt the first time after giving birth nor do I leak pee lol. Well now that I'm pregnant again I do but between pregnancies, I had no bladder problems.
Having a csection does not exempt you from having either of these problems! I sure as hell wish I knew that beforehand.
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| Posted 4/13/15 12:06 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by MrsT809
Posted by Cheeks24
How painful it will be to remove the surgical tape from your stomach after having your c/s.
That reminds me... if you're a month early and didn't get the time to "prepare" down there and have a true emergency cs they will not take the time to shave anything first. You will spend the next few weeks with gunk oozing out of your incision and getting stuck in your hair. My very patient, caring doctor spent a good 10 minutes one day trimming gunk out of my hair down there to try to clean up my incision which was not healing great.
There's such a thing as postpartum preeclampsia. I'd never heard of it until my doctor mentioned that I needed to look out for it (thankfully it never got to that point). My bp was pretty high after both of my deliveries so I got to go back to have it checked frequently after discharge which was annoying.
No one warned me with my vaginal delivery that you may have to stop your epi so you can push. I went from feeling nothing all day to feeling everything during delivery as well as being stitched up.
No one warned me that my second deliver could be opposite in every way from my first. From 2 weeks late to a month early, cs instead of vaginal, and going through a serious complication that could have taken DD2 if it wasn't caught in time. I never thought I'd be that one in 5000 chance.
Who the heck didn't shave you?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Mine was an emergency - DS was out within 30 minutes of them saying we're keeping an eye on his HR but will likely do a c-section - and they still took the two minutes to shave me.
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| Posted 4/13/15 12:34 PM |
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nycgirl
Angels!
Member since 3/09 7721 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Don't make any firm plans for your experience: every one will be different!
You do not have any real control esp when things start to go badly.
Trust your doctor: they are more skilled than you know.
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| Posted 4/13/15 12:41 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by nycgirl
Don't make any firm plans for your experience: every one will be different!
You do not have any real control esp when things start to go badly.
Trust your doctor: they are more skilled than you know.
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| Posted 4/13/15 12:44 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Just thought of 2 more!
When your mlk comes in you will wake up with an instant boob job! I went from a B to a D over night
DH was shocked when I flashed him that morning.
But it also hurts like a mofo! I remember crying on the couch begging DH to bring me ice packs and motrin. My boobs hurt worse than my stitches down below.
I was NOT expecting that.
(I wasn't BFing so I was able to dry it up fast with cabbage leaves and tight tight bras)
You may not experience that immediate LOVE AT FIRST site when they hand you the baby. All I felt was shock. I really felt I was in emotional shock after giving birth. I looked at her and she was a tiny stranger that I didn't know. I was just numb for a while.
Don't feel bad if you don't have that love at first site. It will come.
I can't even begin to tell you the love that comes. It's insane. But it may take a little time! And that's ok too!
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| Posted 4/13/15 2:13 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by jessnbrian
Posted by MrsT809
Posted by Cheeks24
How painful it will be to remove the surgical tape from your stomach after having your c/s.
That reminds me... if you're a month early and didn't get the time to "prepare" down there and have a true emergency cs they will not take the time to shave anything first. You will spend the next few weeks with gunk oozing out of your incision and getting stuck in your hair. My very patient, caring doctor spent a good 10 minutes one day trimming gunk out of my hair down there to try to clean up my incision which was not healing great.
There's such a thing as postpartum preeclampsia. I'd never heard of it until my doctor mentioned that I needed to look out for it (thankfully it never got to that point). My bp was pretty high after both of my deliveries so I got to go back to have it checked frequently after discharge which was annoying.
No one warned me with my vaginal delivery that you may have to stop your epi so you can push. I went from feeling nothing all day to feeling everything during delivery as well as being stitched up.
No one warned me that my second deliver could be opposite in every way from my first. From 2 weeks late to a month early, cs instead of vaginal, and going through a serious complication that could have taken DD2 if it wasn't caught in time. I never thought I'd be that one in 5000 chance.
Who the heck didn't shave you?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Mine was an emergency - DS was out within 30 minutes of them saying we're keeping an eye on his HR but will likely do a c-section - and they still took the two minutes to shave me.
I don't know why they didn't do it. Maybe bc I hadn't even been admitted when they decided to do the cs so they had to do my IV and all that which took time plus DD was going down hill and they didn't have any idea what was wrong. It wasn't a crash cs or anything so you'd think they could have taken one minute. I mentioned to my doctor when she was helping me out (trying to make small talk in an awkward situation) and she said they would have if it wasn't an emergency. Thankfully it was a temporary inconvenience and DD is healthy now so one of those things that doesn't matter in the end.
To all the first time moms to be, it's all worth it times a million in the end! Also every one is different of course. Some have crazy bleeding and others don't. Some can't sit for weeks and others are fine in a few days. With any luck only a few of these will apply to you!
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| Posted 4/13/15 4:47 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Things nobody will tell you
Another one- anytime I peed for the first 7-10 days, it would take me at least 5 mins between peeing, changing pad, using the squirt bottle, blotting with TP (can't wipe with stitches) and spraying dermoplast, then cleaning spray bottle and washing up.
And the passing of clots is a really gross feeling.
Message edited 4/13/2015 5:16:06 PM.
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| Posted 4/13/15 5:13 PM |
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evrythng4areason
And then there were 4
Member since 1/10 5224 total posts
Name:
Kayla
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Things nobody will tell you
That sometimes labor and delivery aren't that bad.
I expected way worse than what I ended up with, and I had zero drugs..not even an iv
The only thing I can think of is bleeding before hand-about 4 hours before she was born I started bleeding, A LOT. It's actually the only reason I went to the hospital.
I didn't fully expect to take a bit to heal. I had such an easy labor and delivery that I felt like an idiot for not being able to do everything for myself right away (including cooking/cleaning lol)
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| Posted 4/13/15 8:02 PM |
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Ayne11
Yep
Member since 1/09 18021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
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| Posted 4/13/15 8:09 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
I am happy to say that I did not have this issue! I never needed colace.
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| Posted 4/13/15 8:22 PM |
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Ayne11
Yep
Member since 1/09 18021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by ElizaRags35
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
I am happy to say that I did not have this issue! I never needed colace.
Maybe it's only c-sections then because they give you such heavy duty drugs that constipate you. It was just brutal LOL
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| Posted 4/13/15 8:24 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Ayne11
Posted by ElizaRags35
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
I am happy to say that I did not have this issue! I never needed colace.
Maybe it's only c-sections then because they give you such heavy duty drugs that constipate you. It was just brutal LOL
Yes I've heard that! I heard they won't even let you get up or shower til you pass gas or poop!
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| Posted 4/13/15 8:29 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Things nobody will tell you
Don't count on the epi.
The incredible unbearable amount of painful "pressure in the bum" that you will experience during labor (That the EPI may not block ). And back labor.
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| Posted 4/13/15 9:19 PM |
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MrsG823
Just call me Mommy.
Member since 1/11 5570 total posts
Name:
S
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by bunnyluck
Don't count on the epi.
The incredible unbearable amount of painful "pressure in the bum" that you will experience during labor (That the EPI may not block ). And back labor.
I agree. I had a spinal and an epidural and neither really helped for the majority of the time I was in labor I felt everything- dd turned face up and it made my labor very, very painful. After five hours or so of pushing the nurse had the doctor give me a different medication and I finally had relief and dd was born 2.5 hours later.
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| Posted 4/13/15 9:29 PM |
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Cheeks24
Living a dream
Member since 1/08 8589 total posts
Name:
Cheeks
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
This reminds me of the first fart after a c/s. They do not let you eat until you fart. So get those legs pumping to get the air flowing
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| Posted 4/13/15 9:45 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Cheeks24
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
This reminds me of the first fart after a c/s. They do not let you eat until you fart. So get those legs pumping to get the air flowing
They let me eat by lunch the next day.... But there's every chance I was already farting. The poop, oh dear lord. I was in such pain being backed up, after not pooping for a week - hadn't pooped since before they started my induction and this was day 3 pp - they gave me the glycerin supp and 30 minutes later I was a whole new woman.
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| Posted 4/13/15 10:11 PM |
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Alilt
LIF Infant
Member since 7/06 273 total posts
Name:
Alison
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Things nobody will tell you
That sometimes the epidural doesn't work and can make you sick.
Then if you end up needing a csection you will need a spinal tap.
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| Posted 4/14/15 8:32 AM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Ayne11
Posted by ElizaRags35
Posted by Ayne11
OMG THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!
That first postpartum poop (If you're given heavy narcotics) is a DOOZY! HOLY F'N COW you're basically birthing another child. My advice is to take 2 colace a day, water and eat ALLLLLL The fiber.
I am happy to say that I did not have this issue! I never needed colace.
Maybe it's only c-sections then because they give you such heavy duty drugs that constipate you. It was just brutal LOL
I didn't have an issue either. I took colace but never had any pain meds after the epi. Pain meds tend to constipate you so that might have been it.
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| Posted 4/14/15 8:57 AM |
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Lola64
She is my heart!
Member since 1/11 1110 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
I can only think of two things...one that we were told of in advance and one that we figured out on our own:
1 - If for some reason, the mother and baby need to be separated - have the father go with the baby. A friend of ours had this - they had to whisk away the baby and the father stood there for a little not knowing who he should go with and take care of. He felt so guilty having to choose.
2 - They might have the father or whoever is in the room with you leave while they administer the epi. Oddly I wasn't worried about giving birth...I was most scared of the epi being that I have back problems. Freaked me out and pissed me off that they wouldn't let hubby stay in the room to comfort me. Not all hospitals/doctors do this. Luckily I really liked the nurse that we had and she calmed me down every single step of the way.
Most everything else people have already said:
The massage to get to the afterbirth out...once you've pushed and hear that beautiful baby cry...there's more that needs to come out. It'll take a little bit to get that done and to stitch you up.
Take stool softener...don't be a hero. Keep taking it for weeks if you have to! Made it much more comfortable with me until I was ready to brave the task on my own.
Nurses will be coming around for ever to check your vitals...and will be massaging your belly to make sure your uterus is contracting. It's painful but bearable.
Have an idea of what your birthplan is...then throw it out the window. Go in to the hospital knowing what the ultimate goal is...and just roll with whatever comes at you. You will get through it, it will be single proudest moment you will ever have in your life.
If you in the midst of a v birth - YOU CAN DO IT. There may come a time you'll turn to your partner and say "I don't think I can do this any more"...yes you most certainly can!!! It's exhausting, painful and challenging. It's just the beginning of the best thing in the world....being a mother! You may not be in love at first sight...I wasn't. I was first off so proud of myself...then relieved it was over...then I held my DD and got to put a face to that little thing that was hanging around under my ribs. Now when she smiles at me when I walk in the room...makes everything worth it. All the tears, sleepless nights, stressful days at work...I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.
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| Posted 4/14/15 9:41 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Lola64
2 - They might have the father or whoever is in the room with you leave while they administer the epi. Oddly I wasn't worried about giving birth...I was most scared of the epi being that I have back problems. Freaked me out and pissed me off that they wouldn't let hubby stay in the room to comfort me. Not all hospitals/doctors do this. Luckily I really liked the nurse that we had and she calmed me down every single step of the way.
I was told by the anesthesiologist that this was because it is a sterile procedure and nobody can be in the room other than the nurse and the person administering it for fear of infection.
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| Posted 4/14/15 9:51 AM |
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Ayne11
Yep
Member since 1/09 18021 total posts
Name:
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Things nobody will tell you
Remembered another thing:
The nurses will separate you and DH at some point when you first arrive to ask you both some domestic abuse questions. "do you fear for your life?" "Are you afraid to go home with your husband/wife?" stuff like that. It scared me the first time, I had no idea they had to do that, but looking back how awesome is that for the women looking for their out!
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| Posted 4/14/15 9:51 AM |
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Lola64
She is my heart!
Member since 1/11 1110 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by Lola64
2 - They might have the father or whoever is in the room with you leave while they administer the epi. Oddly I wasn't worried about giving birth...I was most scared of the epi being that I have back problems. Freaked me out and pissed me off that they wouldn't let hubby stay in the room to comfort me. Not all hospitals/doctors do this. Luckily I really liked the nurse that we had and she calmed me down every single step of the way.
I was told by the anesthesiologist that this was because it is a sterile procedure and nobody can be in the room other than the nurse and the person administering it for fear of infection.
That's what I was told...but other people were telling me that their hubby stayed in the room the whole time. Just worried me because I had him as my support system in my head for that.
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| Posted 4/14/15 10:11 AM |
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Lola64
She is my heart!
Member since 1/11 1110 total posts
Name:
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Re: Things nobody will tell you
Posted by Ayne11
Remembered another thing:
The nurses will separate you and DH at some point when you first arrive to ask you both some domestic abuse questions. "do you fear for your life?" "Are you afraid to go home with your husband/wife?" stuff like that. It scared me the first time, I had no idea they had to do that, but looking back how awesome is that for the women looking for their out!
Maybe I'm blocking this out but I wasn't asked anything like this.
The nurse did quiz us before they released us on shaken baby syndrome, when I need my checkup and when's baby's next checkup.
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| Posted 4/14/15 10:13 AM |
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