UPDATED Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

7/27

So yesterday I fed her every 3 hours. Was SO not a problem to stretch it. She was totally fine with it.

Her naps did not improve-- although she did sleep for almost an hour in the stroller.

Bedtime went about the same and she went right to sleep at 6:30. She woke for the first time at 3 30 and soothed herself back to sleep after 10 mins of fussing. I know she is capable of this and I think she has finally found her thumb. Then at 4 30-- she was up again and crying hard. She was definitely hungry and downed 7 oz. After that, she slept til 7 30 this morning!!

This is where this leaves me-
- She is definitely hungry in the middle of the night and needs a bottle or to nurse.

- If I continue to EBF, I still won't have enough to give a bottle should I choose to go out for a few hours and not be home for a feeding.

- The feeding every 3 hours, will give me a lot more time at least!!!

- I think I need to try a little supplementing at night to save some BM for daytime needs (bottles and cereal) and to get her to sleep throughout since hunger is what is waking her, and/or keeping her from staying asleep. I will wait a few more days to see if there is any more improvement-- but my gut tells me this is the route to go.

Thanks everyone for your continued advice and support.






Please help me figure out what to do next.

So, we tried Ferberizing. Didn't work. But, we did successfully wean off the swaddle. So at least one thing to check off the list.

We also succeeded in having her wake up twice again-- not this 3, 4 or 5 time business. Mini check.

DH has gone back to giving her bottle at the first wake up when he can. Now, the bottle she needs in the middle of the night is 8oz. I can't pump 8oz in a day-- so, I try by waiting later to pump. I usually do it at bedtime at 9PM, but now I need to try to stay up later to get more. I usually just have to get up and feed her because I don't get enough-- AND my body can't take going to sleep later. I must get my hardcore sleep right away to compensate for being out of bed in the early morning.

I have been trying fenugreek to get more milk. I don't think it's making me feel very good, and I am not really seeign a difference in milk production. I am stopping.

She is up at 2/3, then again at 5-- for the day. She needs to learn to sleep a little longer after that middle of the night feed. If she did, I would be SO happy.

After she is up, she only naps for 30 mins at a time. The naps WERE increasing in length. Now they are getting shorter and she is harder to go down. I don't know what happened.

I have a theory that she is snacking throughout the day and not really *eating*. I think it takes a long time for my milk to replenish. This may be why she is a bad napper, and why she wakes up still so frequently at night. Maybe something just happened with my supply which is the reason for the change in naps.

I started her on cereal (once a day), even though she isn't eating any of it-- but, I guess I hope by next week she will. Oh, this uses some of my pumped milk too. So, I need like 10 oz a day.

Here are my thoughts:
- I need to do full on CIO extinction if I want to see any changes at night
- I maybe (not really sure) have a milk supply problem
- I should maybe introduce formula to help with the first two bullet points
- If I can get daytime OR nighttime sleeping down- the other will fall into place. Now, both are just all over the place

I feel like everything is all related. I go back to the doc on 8/6 and plan to discuss everything then. But I want to try other things to at least make SOME progress. It's so frustrating how hard I am working and nothing changes-- or it gets worse. I am a zombie.

Message edited 7/27/2009 9:16:31 AM.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

I gotta call my Ped, because I don't think I can wait 2 weeks before doing something different.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

How about gradually reducing the amnt of oz she gets in the middle of the night

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

How old is DD?

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

What if you just supplement at night with formula and forget about pumping all together?

Once she starts napping better she will sleep better so I would try and see what you can do for that.

When do you try putting her down for her first nap?

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

i hate to say it, but i agree with some of the above posters..i know how hard youre trying with BFing exclusively..but, i think shes hungry..at this age, and her weight, she shouldnt physiologically be needing to eat in the middle of the nite..unless shes hungry from the daytime..
randi i would try it..
i had to do it with Melania, and it made a HUGE difference. Good luck, FM if you have any questions!!

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

i say start the formula!!

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

There is a Bf support thread on here full of very helpful mommies :) if you want to ask on there too
but i agree with the posters who say you need to do what is best for both of you, you need your sleep

I just started taking fenugreek and my 3 week old is being very cranky, i am wondering if it has something to do with it. she is not sleeping well either

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Out of curiosity do you have a freezer stash that you could use for now for the night feedings and see if you can talk to the ped or wean her off in the next few weeks.

There is nothing wrong with starting formula but if you have the milk laying around then there is no sense in you trying something new so late in the game.

Also, have you tried giving her the cereal yet a bit thicker and see if she eats it?

I had the same "issue" with Alexa "snacking" all day and not eating so all she was getting was a lot of fore milk and not the rich creamy hind milk to hold her over.

My ped had me hold off feeding her to at least every 3 hours during the day so she would be really hungry and eat a decent amount and it worked. I only had to do it one day to get her off the snacking cycle and onto an "eating" one. It was REALLY HARD that day but once I did it she stopped the short little snack and REALLY nursed, started napping ans sleeping better. I also tried soothing her in other ways FIRST before giving her the boob. I dind't want to cut out comfort nursing completely but not whip out the boob for every single whine because I did!


Good Luck... I know you must be EXHAUSTED

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

I did this and found it helped...after my last BF of the night (before bed) I would supp. and give her a few oz. of formula. She started sleeping 10 hours at that point.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Posted by Blissful

My ped had me hold off feeding her to at least every 3 hours during the day so she would be really hungry and eat a decent amount and it worked. I only had to do it one day to get her off the snacking cycle and onto an "eating" one. It was REALLY HARD that day but once I did it she stopped the short little snack and REALLY nursed, started napping ans sleeping better. I also tried soothing her in other ways FIRST before giving her the boob. I dind't want to cut out comfort nursing completely but not whip out the boob for every single whine because I did!

Good Luck... I know you must be EXHAUSTED

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

I def think try formual she may just not be getting enough during the day as you said

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

thanks--

the every 3 hour thing might work. Sasha has always been an efficient nurser, but I still have no clue with what is going on with her eating.

the other thing I was thinking of doing was a dream feed with a bottle before DH goes to bed.

Last night she woke up at about 3-- but was more sort of whining so I left her. Finally at 4 30- DH gave a bottle and she slept a bit later this morning. I heard her about 7, and she was chilling in her crib and I didn't have to go in to her right away. Even when I fed her- she didn't NEED to eat that point, I just needed to feed as I was engorged, etc.

I feel sort of lost because there was no 5 month check up-- and while she is def growing-- I am not sure of her weight gain, etc.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

IMO she does not NEED to eat in the middle of the night at this point. I think that BFing is making you second guess yourself because you can not measure the # of oz's she is eating. I say try to CIO at 2-3am and see how that goes. She is now in the Habit of eating then, so it may take a little while. Be strong!

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Posted by ChrisDee

IMO she does not NEED to eat in the middle of the night at this point. I think that BFing is making you second guess yourself because you can not measure the # of oz's she is eating. I say try to CIO at 2-3am and see how that goes. She is now in the Habit of eating then, so it may take a little while. Be strong!

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

i don't have any experience with this but if she is taking an 8 oz. bottle in the middle of the night it seems that she is not getting enough during the day. if she were just waking up for the attention, she would not be finishing that bottle.

i think that if you are worried about our supply, try more milk plus instead of fenugreek. i have heard good things about it.

and don't feel bad about adding one bottle of formula if your supply doesn't increase.

i would try nursing her more often during the day, especially if you think she is just snacking. then i would give her formula at her last feeding, and do CIO if she wakes up. hopefully that works.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Posted by randella

Posted by ChrisDee

IMO she does not NEED to eat in the middle of the night at this point. I think that BFing is making you second guess yourself because you can not measure the # of oz's she is eating. I say try to CIO at 2-3am and see how that goes. She is now in the Habit of eating then, so it may take a little while. Be strong!

this is what we did last night. She kept going in and out with the crying--so I knew she was ok. By 4 30, her cries were stronger, so I knew she needed to eat at that point.

I think we'll continue to see how long she makes it, while spacing out daytime feedings.

In another day or two, I may try a little formula in a bottle at night, although I nurse her at bedtime, I may need to switch it up.

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

I would give a formula bottle right before bed this is what I do with DD and she sleeps much better plus I am ready to go with full boobs at 3 am and she gets a good feeding and sleeps till 9 -930am.. DD is only 3 months old and her last feeding is 8pm.. If her last feeding is 9-930pm she goes till 5-6am... I dont pump that much either and I feel like when I pump I dont have enough all day..

Re: Ladies, I am exhausted... please help me sort this out. (long)

My son is the same age. He still gets up at around 2/3 and then is up at 5/6 and will maybe go back to sleep while breastfeeding. I try to doze with him- its really nice.

I don't think you will see an end to the middle of the night feeding just yet. Some babies just still need that extra comfort until 7 or 8 months of age. Its very normal actually. It's tough when you are the one missing sleep however. I do understand MORE than you know. This past week my DD has been sick so I have been up pretty much round the clock. Its killer!

If you are concerned about supply, why don't you talk to your Dr. about supplementing. Jack has both formula and breastmilk and has no problem going back and forth from both. I could never pump well with either child so if I want a second away from him it was the only way to do it. Also I added a lot of oatmeal to my diet and my supply has increased a bunch. Fungreek did nothing for me last time either.

Hang in there and try to wait out the middle of night wakeups. If it doesn't improve by 7 months, then maybe a full out CIO program is the way to go. I would start with naps since she has a problem with them. My DD was a horrible napper until we did CIO for naps at 6 months. 2 years later and she is STILL a champion napper.

Hope all that helps! Hang in there and know you are not alone right now!