UPDATE!!!Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

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nrthshgrl
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

I would call the teacher to get some additional insight...and then if my daughter didn't want to get together over the summer, I'd go along with it.

If in September, she started the stalker MO again, I'd speak to your daughter's teacher. If the teacher isn't responsive, then I'd kick it up to the principal. I think chain of command is very important & having the teacher as an ally will go a longer way since she is closer to the situation than the principal.

Posted 6/22/09 1:04 PM

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carolyns4cupcakes
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

Posted by headoverheels

i think you have to trust your mommy instincts on this one. i would also point out to your DD that she was smart to trust her own instincts, and that is something she should always do. if something doesn't feel right, it usually isn't.

Good thing the school year is over. Hopefully it dies down over the summer- even though the kid is makign plans.

Ask your DD what she wants to do and go from there along with your thoughts.

GL, I'm with you on this one.

Posted 6/22/09 1:10 PM

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ARIELSMOM
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

it sounds like a bit much, maybe now that school is almost over it will subside. if the girl doesnt have many friends maybe she is very attached to your daughter. Id keep an eye out, but try not to get to worried yet.

Posted 6/22/09 1:10 PM

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dpli
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

First, I don't think you have done your daughter a disservice by teaching her to be nice to other kids. The world could use a lot more children like that. Now that she's getting older though, I think it's good to teach them to trust their instincts as well and to let you know when other kids make them uncomfortable. I think we are so worried about adults making kids uncomfortable, we forget that other kids can do this too.

I also thought it could be Asperger's. I have a very close friend who has a son with Asperger's and he has had a rough time with the social stuff. What this other girl did sounds like something I could imagine this boy doing as well, and then not really understanding why it might be inappropriate. I would talk to the teacher about it before talking to the other mom.

Posted 6/22/09 1:18 PM

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Bxgell2
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

It's very possible this little girl has either a diagnosed, or undiagnosed, social disability. Our neighbor's daughter has this, and exhibits some of the same behavior, which to people who are unfamiliar with her diagnosis, can make them feel very uncomfortable.

I don't think your daughter is at any risk in this situation, but maybe for the benefit of this other girl, it may help to have a discussion with the teacher and "feel it out" - if nothing else, it may raise the school's awareness, and perhaps prompt an evaluation of some kind, which, in the long run, could really help this girl.

Posted 6/22/09 1:21 PM

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sometimesmommy
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

Posted by ARIELSMOM

it sounds like a bit much, maybe now that school is almost over it will subside. if the girl doesnt have many friends maybe she is very attached to your daughter. Id keep an eye out, but try not to get to worried yet.

I agree with this. Dont react just yet. Its such a fragile age BUT if anything else happens you may have to say something...especially if your DD gets uncomfortable. Chat Icon

Posted 6/22/09 1:25 PM

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SweetCin
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Re: Please help me sort this thing out...LONG SORRY

Posted by Stacey1403

Posted by donegal419

Posted by imthekevinofcindyandkevin

This sorta happened to Chel.

My guess is this girl is the odd man out most of the time and your DD was nice to her at some point and now she's like a cat you fed that won't go away. Talk to the teacher and see if there is anything going on at home with this kid.

That was the situation with us and the girl eventually moved on from Chel and all is well now.

ITA! and as a teacher of fifth graders, I am a bit surprised that the teacher let her read this essay. i mean, i feel i have a good pulse on what's going on with the kids, who's friends with who, who's not, who's trying too hard, etc. i would think that i would have been able to pick up on the fact that Mary was a little "too into" your daughter and that she was freaked by it. i am surprised that the teacher didn't pick up on this. i would think that for something like this the teacher would have seen the essays before they were shared...

ITA with this.

I would maybe mention something to the teacher if you feel comfortable doing so. It is the end of the school year so I would say if your DD is uncomfortable then I would not have any GTG's or sleepovers. Good Luck.

I also agree w/ this Heather & I question the teacher's judgment too--especially b/c she didn't specifically mention why your DD was her hero...the essay sounds a bit stalkerish. Like someone else said I'd definitely say to her to always trust her instincts (like she did). Was the other girls' mom there? Did she say anything to you?

I'm sure by the time school starts again, this won't/shouldn't be an issue, but definitely see what you DD says about it today & it couldn't hurt to talk to her teacher.

It does sound like she may be the odd guy out though & your DD prob. did do something nice for her.

And Kelly, that story Chat Icon