Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

My BIL is getting married in St. Lucia next March. The kids are invited dd1 will be 2.5 and dd2 will be 9 months. My mom has offered to watch both girls while we go there for four days. My mom is the only person I'd trust with my babies. We live in a 2 family home with my parents so it's not like the girls would have to go somewhere else while we are gone. Here is my main fear that I won't enjoy myself without them, that I'll stay up crying all night because I miss them. I've never spent more than 6 hours away from my dd. Dh is also on the fence if we should bring them. He thinks we should have some alone time but is afraid our oldest will miss us too much. We wouldn't have anyone at the wedding to watch them. I don't trust anyone in dh family to care for them. I know we'd be chasing the girls all over, have to go in our hotel early tO get them to sleep. When I think about those 2 things I feel like we hold leave them home but than I think about not being with them and my heart breaks. Maybe I'm a little crazy but I just worry a lot. Would you take the kids or leave them home with Grandma?

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

OMG... Go away without them! You and DH will have a great time. I'm sure there will be times you'll miss them and get sad, but you also need your own time.
The girls will have a great time with Grandma and I'm sure spoil them so much that they'll be fine.
The hardest times are when it's quiet on the plane or something. Bring some books, games, movies, etc to keep yourself occupied and enjoy.
Stay up late, drink, lay out, and
Lots!!
I'm sooo close with my parents, but I remember them doing vacations without us once in a while. Then we LOVED grandparent time. We also did a lot of family vacations too.
Make the most of it and when you get back plan a fun family day together!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

YAY! If you have an opportunity to go and can leave them with someone you trust I say GO!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

If I had an opportunity like that I'd go without them
The thought of travelling that far with 2 kids that age makes my blood pressure rise!
Not to mention you'd get alone time with DH
Not to mention you KNOW they'd be in great hands
I'd jump at the chance to go alone and just relax and enjoy

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Depends on how long you'd be away. I'm a FTWM so my time with DS is precious. A weekend with DH...sure. Beyond that, I can't justify being away from DS. Like you, I would only leave him with my parents while away.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I think this is a personal question--different moms will feel different ways, and that doesn't make it right or wrong. For me, I would miss my kids. I'd enjoy a few things that I wouldn't otherwise be able to do with them, but I'd miss making memories with them on vacation. The very most i have done is two nights, and i missed them a lot the second night/morning.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Yay!- Go and enjoy. DD will miss you but will that much more happy when you come home.

We went away for 1 day/night last weekend, I know not as long, but dd had so much fun with my parents.

I want to/would go away for a few days in a heartbeat.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Go away alone - we had a destination wedding when my twins were 4 months and my son was a little over 2.

I thought the older was going to have a problem without me but he did fine.

it was a nice break for me and my dh - we were away for 4 days too. we got to relax and hang out with family and sleep late and it felt wonderful.

one note - is if you can give your parents the car seat and put your cars someplace elese. kids equate your car with you being home.

I really thought my older son would wake up asking for me because he always does but he had no problem with his grandparents taking care of him

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I am a FTWM and I still vote for going away with just you and your husband. I am sure there will be times you will miss your daughters but at the same time it will be 4 days of you and your husband recharging your marriage just the two of you. I would personally jump at the chance, especially if I had someone I completely trusted watching my children !!!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I am a FTWM - DH and I went away in March on a much needed vacation - alone - to Napa/Sonoma for a week.
I was FABULOUS !!

Did I miss the kids? Of course -
Did I miss the kids to the point that I couldn't enjoy myself? Absolutely not!
Toward the end I was kind of ready to go home ........but I'm like that w/ any week long vacation -
The only thing I was a little anxious about was flying .........but I got over it. -I could get hit by a bus walking to the office on a Tuesday morning -

They were with my parents on a 'vacation' of their own - having a great time. Sean asked when we were coming home once - Lol.

IMO it's great to take some time for yourselves when/if you can. - it doesn't make you a 'bad' parent if you leave your kids and do something for yourself - it doesn't make you a 'better' parent if you never go anywhere w/o you children - it's just a matter of what makes you happy.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I would go. But then again I just went to Chicago for 3 days and my DS was 12 weeks at the time. I missed him but got pictures daily.

I was told kids are not a jail sentence so I continue to still do things for me and think I have a great balance between my kids and me time.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I am borderline crazy.
I am a sahm with zero family around.
they should have never cut umbilical cord because i am always with my two. never took bottles, no preschool...they are always with me.

i left them in january to cruise with dh. i thought i would cancel, that i could not go through with it...but once we pulled out of the driveway, i took 2 shots- and away we went.
i hope to do it every year.
go...it is a real vacation without them, otherwise just a trip with more work.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

do it! event mommies need mommy alone time esp with their hubbies

If I have the opportunity I will def be doing it!

I love to go away with the kids ..but I also enjoy a lil R&R as an adult!

It may be scary at first..but I am sure you will be glad you did and enjoy yourselves

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Ummm Hell Yay!!!!!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Yay! DH and I are vacationing with DS next week but without him in Dec. I can't wait for both trips!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

I'm obviously in the minority but I would take them. I can't imagine needing to try to explain to my 2.5 yr old that I was leaving him for 4 days. I also believe that a 9 month old will be aware that his/her parents are gone and feel "abandonment." (I am in no way implying thought that you are abandoning your child). I am in psychology though so I have set beliefs about this.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

i'd leave them home with grandma. If you trust her, then why not? sounds like a win win and i'm sure you won't have to worry about them.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

i am a FTWM and in july me and DH will be going away without DD for 7 days. Will i miss her? yes and while i dont know for sure i am thinking we will have a good time anyway.

So my vote is go withouth them; you will probably have a better time!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

It took me 4 years to get over the guilt of doing this. I was dead set against it. We finally just took a 3 day trip to Miami without kids in March and it was AMAZING. We so needed it for us as a couple and plan to do it at least once a year.

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

OMG YAY! Go! Especially how their schedules and surroundings will not be disrupted.

I actually did this when my 1st DD was only 11 weeks old

and if I had to decide again - I would do it!

Good Luck and enjoy.....

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

YAY!! Enjoy yourselves!

Re: Vacationing without the kids? Yay or nah??

Definitely go! You couldnt ask for your kids to be in a better situation while you're gone. I know exactly how you feel about leaving them and missing them. Im starting to get anxiety over the 4 days Ill be in the hospital when I have this baby in May. But you'll be gone for 4 days, not 2 weeks, not even 1 week! Im sure you and your DH could use some quality time together (who couldn't?!?) and to be in a beautiful place like St. Lucia is a perfect oppurtunity.

Go. Enjoy. Don't feel guilty at all!