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Palebride
I am an amazing bakist
Member since 5/05 13673 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
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Posted 7/18/09 11:11 AM  |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by Palebride
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
ITA!
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:12 AM |
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Porrruss
Nya nya nya
Member since 5/05 11618 total posts
Name:
Amy
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Even though your ped told you she shouldn't be waking, I still don't think she's "ready". My ped told me 6 months, so that tells you there is no exact timeframe.
I truly believe that EBF babies take longer.
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:14 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
mine took 2 naps a day, 2 hours long till 8 months old.
this was only done because I nursed him to sleep and held him for all 4 hours.
that was our nap schedule. the second I put him down, bam, naptime was over.
at night, he woke 3 times a night till 14 mos. that's when I night weaned him.
up until then he was up every 2 hours. it was a nightmare, but it did not last forever. he just wanted to be held by me all the time.
only time will tell, no 2 babies are the same, I think your ped gave you false hope with that 4 month old comment.
I think you have to wait until 12 mos old to nightwean.
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:17 AM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
When you put her down do you put her down already sleeping or still tired but awake, the reason I ask is bc we used to always put Chels down alseep after her last bottle, when we started putting her down awake I think she taught herself to put herself to sleep and thats when the night wakings stopped and her naps have gotten better...
My husband thinks I'm a schedule freak but I stick to it to a tee and she is thankfully a good sleeper, but if you haven't tried putting her down awake yet I would def try that....
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:37 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by Porrruss
Even though your ped told you she shouldn't be waking, I still don't think she's "ready". My ped told me 6 months, so that tells you there is no exact timeframe.
I truly believe that EBF babies take longer.
I also agree with this. Every baby is different so I'm not sure how your ped can say that at 4 months she doesn't need to eat, especially being that she is EBF?
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:39 AM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by Diana1215
Posted by Palebride
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
ITA!
ITA also Randi. I think I might feed her the first time and see what happens. Maybe she is waking because she is hungry. My kids are still waking to eat at night at 8 months...and they are now FF!
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:42 AM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Randi - I agree with others, try feeding her the first time she wakes up and go from there. Just becaues the ped said she doesn't have to eat when she wakes up, doesn't mean she's not hungry. I could understand if she had been STTN consistently for a while then all of the sudden started waking up. That to me would show me that she can go the whole night without eating and isn't necessarily hungry.
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:53 AM |
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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
Name:
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by DRMom
Posted by Diana1215
Posted by Palebride
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
ITA!
ITA also Randi. I think I might feed her the first time and see what happens. Maybe she is waking because she is hungry. My kids are still waking to eat at night at 8 months...and they are now FF!
I agree too. My ped said the same thing to us when DS was 5 months old...and honestly, we made ourselves (and DS) miserable for a LONG time (like 6 months ) trying to pull it off. In the long run, I just resigned myself to him needing to eat during the night and when he turned one, and was on milk and not formula anymore, we did CIO again and were successful.
Unfortunately, just b/c the ped says it, dpesn't mean that it is true, even though they know your child
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| Posted 7/18/09 11:54 AM |
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jprimrose
I love my little munchkins!
Member since 10/05 3939 total posts
Name:
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by Diana1215
Posted by Palebride
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
ITA!
ITA Every baby is different and I think at 5.5 months it is still okay to wake at night for feedings.
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| Posted 7/18/09 12:41 PM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
thanks for the help.
I guess I just need to revise the strategy and I will try an earlier feeding, as opposed to the 4/5AM one, and see if that makes a difference. At least this way-- DH can go back to waking and giving her a bottle!! 
I seriously was just almost in tears though-- I went for a short walk and the moment she decides she is tired-- she NEEDS to be put in the crib and wails and fusses. I stop a million times, try to paci, rock her in the stroller-- until I just give up and pick her up.
I just really need her to get better rested. I had a bunch of mom's over yesterday and seeing all the other babies, including twins, behave so differently than Sasha-- all just chilling out, quietly falling asleep, etc-- I just feel like I have such a hard time.
She better be an easy toddler!!!
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| Posted 7/18/09 12:56 PM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
Posted by randella
I seriously was just almost in tears though-- I went for a short walk and the moment she decides she is tired-- she NEEDS to be put in the crib and wails and fusses. I stop a million times, try to paci, rock her in the stroller-- until I just give up and pick her up.
Samantha is like this too. I missed my sisters entire fellowship graduation because Samantha was beyond tired and would not just sleep in the stroller or my arms. She had such a fit that she broke out in hives all over her face. She is not one to just fall alseep anywhere which makes it difficult to do things with her.
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| Posted 7/18/09 1:00 PM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
Name:
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working?
DS woke in the middle of the night...and we fed him each time and rocked him. It was exhausting but eventually he outgrew it. It went from three wakes early on...to two and as fast as it moved to one it was over and he was sleeping through the night.
Before one year I would go to him when he cried at night. After he was conistently sleeping through the night I would wait if he cried to determine if it was an "I need something" or just a slight wake - in that case I let him cry for a bit and he would go back to sleep.
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| Posted 7/18/09 1:03 PM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
updated with this morning's results.
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| Posted 7/19/09 8:49 AM |
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alexlynn7
Big brother to be!
Member since 9/06 6314 total posts
Name:
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
randi, i think you're wise to give sleep training a rest for now. it doesn't sound like she's ready, and until she is you'll be banging your head against the wall.
how old is she now, 5ish months? if so, i don't think it's realistic to expect a 12 hour stretch, especially because she is ebf. my ds was also ebf at 4-5 months and was still getting up 1-2 times at night. we didn't get the 12 hour stretch until closer to 9-10 months, even after transitioning to formula...
meanwhile my DD gets up only once at night... at one week old  hopefully it will last... but my point is, every baby is different...
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| Posted 7/19/09 9:19 AM |
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kelsept
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/07 833 total posts
Name:
Kelley
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
Teething can be hard on them. My DD is almost 8 months and still wakes, nothing works...i have just accepted the fact that she will outgrow this. She has 4 teeth coming in on top at the same time. I have noticed a low grade off and on and i am not kidding when i tell you she can wake up easily 4 times a night and my DD STTN from 3-5 months for 11 hour stretches. It sucks, i know, my DD is always tired, fights sleep like i have never seen..it becomes so awful but i really think they will eventually outgrow this..some have a much harder time with teething..some nights DD just sleeps through so it makes me think something is waking her. I do give her a bottle as it soothes her and she drains it...growth spurts and all that good stuff come around your DD age too...hang in there. I am right there with you..nothing has worked for me either...
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| Posted 7/19/09 9:47 AM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
Posted by alexlynn7
randi, i think you're wise to give sleep training a rest for now. it doesn't sound like she's ready, and until she is you'll be banging your head against the wall.
how old is she now, 5ish months? if so, i don't think it's realistic to expect a 12 hour stretch, especially because she is ebf. my ds was also ebf at 4-5 months and was still getting up 1-2 times at night. we didn't get the 12 hour stretch until closer to 9-10 months, even after transitioning to formula...
meanwhile my DD gets up only once at night... at one week old hopefully it will last... but my point is, every baby is different...
She is 5.5 months. The issue really was-- was that she was waking 4 to 5 times a night, which is certainly not necessary at this point. She didn't wake this much as a newborn. And this has been going on pretty consistently.
She also is a very poor napper.
If she is teething now, it has only been the last week or so, but her behavior has been constant.
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| Posted 7/19/09 10:10 AM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
Posted by randella
Posted by alexlynn7
randi, i think you're wise to give sleep training a rest for now. it doesn't sound like she's ready, and until she is you'll be banging your head against the wall.
how old is she now, 5ish months? if so, i don't think it's realistic to expect a 12 hour stretch, especially because she is ebf. my ds was also ebf at 4-5 months and was still getting up 1-2 times at night. we didn't get the 12 hour stretch until closer to 9-10 months, even after transitioning to formula...
meanwhile my DD gets up only once at night... at one week old hopefully it will last... but my point is, every baby is different...
She is 5.5 months. The issue really was-- was that she was waking 4 to 5 times a night, which is certainly not necessary at this point. She didn't wake this much as a newborn. And this has been going on pretty consistently.
She also is a very poor napper.
If she is teething now, it has only been the last week or so, but her behavior has been constant.
You know she could also be having a growth spurt-I thoink there is one around 6 months. Have you tried rubbing her back or belly to get her settled for naps. I started that with my kids rather than picking them up
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| Posted 7/19/09 10:28 AM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
Posted by DRMom
You know she could also be having a growth spurt-I thoink there is one around 6 months. Have you tried rubbing her back or belly to get her settled for naps. I started that with my kids rather than picking them up
nah-- it's been happening for way too long-- months.
I don't usually pick her up to soothe at all-- unless she is a total maniac.
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| Posted 7/19/09 10:35 AM |
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annie
This is how I play basketball!
Member since 6/05 1980 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
It sounds like she can't soothe herself, as a PP mentioned. She may be able to fall asleep initially because she's so tired, but if she's waking up so many times a night & crying, rather than falling back asleep (and such short naps) it just sounds like she really can't soothe herself. Which is very common with babies of course. I'm dealing with something similar with my 5 1/2 month old. I'm reading the sleep lady's book "Good Night, Sleep Tight" & started the "sleep lady shuffle" tonight. I tried the Ferber method for 1 1/2 weeks and after tons of tears (on both sides) it didn't really help (1 STTN, other nights there was no difference at all). So, on to the next method. I feel your frustration- it is so challenging to deal wtih!
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| Posted 7/19/09 9:54 PM |
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cjik
Welcome 2010!
Member since 2/06 8879 total posts
Name:
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Re: When do you decide that your method of sleep training is not working? UPDATE #1
Posted by Palebride
I know this isn't what you want to hear....but I think you're doing everything you can, listening to her cues, and trying new things with her....but if that's not working - she's just not ready yet.
Generally, EBF babies wake a lot more at night also.
Sorry!
ITA. She is still a very young baby, and many of the sleep books I have read don't mention using Ferber or CIO until 5 or 6 months. She may still need the feedings also, especially if she is a smaller child. And as another poster mentioned, teething can be going on, and that disrupts sleep too. It's more apparent to us now that DS is older, teething less, and sleeps better, but when he was young we often had no idea why he wasn't sleeping through the night.
I never used sleep training for any amount of time really, I tried Ferber for a few days and really felt it was just wrong for us. I couldn't do CIO either, and quite a few people insisted I had to use it to get DS to sleep properly, including my pediatrician. In the end, I wound up looking more at his sleep patterns over the course of a whole day, including naps, and got him on more of a feeding schedule. Once he had more clearcut schedules in place, he slept better. Plus, we gave him a lovey to sleep with around 6 or 7 months, and that helped tremendously. And as already mentioned, when his teething lessened, he generally slept better also. He still has night wakings (bad dreams, teething, illness), but they are less frequent and when he does wake and cry for any length of time now, it generally means he needs us for some reason. We don't check on him with every cry, but if he wakes and just can't settle down, we go to him.
I figured out my sleep training method (Ferber) wasn't working because DS was hysterical, vomiting from crying so hard, and I was upset too. It just felt very wrong. So that's when I did some reading and figured out other ways to address his sleep issues and ditched Ferber. And today, DS sleeps beautifully most nights, from 8 pm till 7 am. So for me, it was more of a feeling that I just didn't want to use sleep training with my child, less that it wouldn't work. It probably would have worked if I kept with it. This way took longer and resulted in more sleepless nights, but the end result worked for us. I think you need to figure out what you are comfortable with and stick with it.
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| Posted 7/19/09 10:16 PM |
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