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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Jenn627
I have no children and when I worked in corporate America - I got a lot of perks too. At least I think I did.
Maybe I just didn't realize when people were abusing the "I have kids" excuse. Maybe it's because I didn't really care. I don't ever worry about what everyone else is doing. I worry about my job, my actions, etc. I don't whine that so-and-so took off early b/c of their kids and I get asked to work late.
I mean I would hope that if extenuating circumstances arose - I would get the time off I needed.
When DH and I bought our house - we did MAJOR construction on it - we gave the contractors the key - they came and went as they pleased. Once our home was in order - we changed the locks and scheduled everything AROUND work.
If I needed to take a day off - I put in for it.
I'm sorry - I just don't understand the complaints about other people taking off. Maybe it's because now I own my own business and I HATE the grade-school mentality of "Jane did this, why can't I do that?" I'm a broken record with saying "worry about yourself."
Putting in for time off is the key term....we are talking about parents that need to work from home, or leave early or come in late for some sort of child issue. There have been many times that I have worked with parents that will come in late or leave early and they are NOT taking any vacation time for that.
I wouldnt care if my co-workers that have children needed to take vacation or personal time off...I resent the 2 hours, or 45 mins, 1/2 day time off that they get and STILL have all their vacation time. Thats what is NOT right.....
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Posted 6/29/09 2:22 PM  |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: work issues for those without children
I'm just trying to point out that if you keep letting the resentment build up - who is it hurting more? The people you resent, or yourself?
edit sp
Message edited 6/29/2009 2:25:11 PM.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:24 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Jenn627
I'm just trying to point out that if you keep letting the resentment build up - who is it hurting more? The people you resent, or yourself?
edit sp
thanks....
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:26 PM |
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Nifheim
allo
Member since 1/09 5476 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: work issues for those without children
if you have time off then take it however you would like fine, but if you are using any excuse over and over again (children, dog, house, etc) not taking docking your time its annoying/abusive.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:27 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Jenn627
I have no children and when I worked in corporate America - I got a lot of perks too. At least I think I did.
Maybe I just didn't realize when people were abusing the "I have kids" excuse. Maybe it's because I didn't really care. I don't ever worry about what everyone else is doing. I worry about my job, my actions, etc. I don't whine that so-and-so took off early b/c of their kids and I get asked to work late.
I mean I would hope that if extenuating circumstances arose - I would get the time off I needed.
When DH and I bought our house - we did MAJOR construction on it - we gave the contractors the key - they came and went as they pleased. Once our home was in order - we changed the locks and scheduled everything AROUND work.
If I needed to take a day off - I put in for it.
I'm sorry - I just don't understand the complaints about other people taking off. Maybe it's because now I own my own business and I HATE the grade-school mentality of "Jane did this, why can't I do that?" I'm a broken record with saying "worry about yourself."
After reading this, I don't think you understood my post at all. I'm NOT complaining about other people taking the time off they need. I think I've mentioned that more than once in this thread already. In fact, I'm the first one to jump in to help when someone needs time off for ANY reason. I AM worrying about myself, not other people. I am the one who is expected to work more hours and more weekends than those with children simply because I don't have children.
This is hardly a "grade school mentality" of "Jane took off an extra day last month, so I want one, too." If you read my post closely, I think you'd see that. This is an issue of I am expected to sacrifice more of my time than other people -- on projects that aren't even mine to begin with -- simply because I don't have children.
I may be employed by someone else, but I manage a very large staff. I'm familiar with the usual, ridiculous complaints about other workers and time off and perks. I don't see how this falls into that category. Just because I don't run my own business full time yet doesn't mean I'm immature and my issues with unfair treatment of employees are "grade school."
ETA - You say if you wanted a day off, you put in for it. Well, in my field (litigation), it's NOT always that easy. One, you can't "put in for time off" on weekends when your normal work week is Mon - Friday. I have put in for vacation, had it approved, and then been told last minute I couldn't go because I had to work. That's a reality I accept because of my line of work. What bothers me is when I am scheduled for vacation or make plans and I am made to work in place of someone else because I don't have children and someone else does.
Message edited 6/29/2009 2:33:49 PM.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:31 PM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Jenn627
Posted by annoyedTTCer
You don't understand how someone can be annyoed at missing Father's Day with their father because they had to work to cover for a co-worker with kids?
You don't see how people can get annoyed at coming in and working 8-6 while others work 10-4 because of their kids while getting the same pay and benefits?
Really?
No, I can't see it. I've missed holidays as I am sure have parents.
Maybe the person working 10-4 has a strong work ethic and turns out 10 hrs of quality work in a 6 hour day. Maybe they've been a stellar employee for 20 yrs and so instead of a promotion, they get decreased hours, maybe they are sleeping with the boss and get to do whatever they want. Bottom line - I don't care what anyone else is doing.
Life isn't fair.
I don't think you understood the OP at all.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:37 PM |
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LoveyQ
Stalkers, get a life.
Member since 11/07 12820 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by Jenn627
I have no children and when I worked in corporate America - I got a lot of perks too. At least I think I did.
Maybe I just didn't realize when people were abusing the "I have kids" excuse. Maybe it's because I didn't really care. I don't ever worry about what everyone else is doing. I worry about my job, my actions, etc. I don't whine that so-and-so took off early b/c of their kids and I get asked to work late.
I mean I would hope that if extenuating circumstances arose - I would get the time off I needed.
When DH and I bought our house - we did MAJOR construction on it - we gave the contractors the key - they came and went as they pleased. Once our home was in order - we changed the locks and scheduled everything AROUND work.
If I needed to take a day off - I put in for it.
I'm sorry - I just don't understand the complaints about other people taking off. Maybe it's because now I own my own business and I HATE the grade-school mentality of "Jane did this, why can't I do that?" I'm a broken record with saying "worry about yourself."
You don't understand how someone can be annyoed at missing Father's Day with their father because they had to work to cover for a co-worker with kids?
You don't see how people can get annoyed at coming in and working 8-6 while others work 10-4 because of their kids while getting the same pay and benefits?
Really?
Exactly. I don't think the issue is being worried about one person taking time off and not you - it's about someone getting PAID to take extra time off (without it being charged against their allotted time), whereas others without children have to work their regular hours and don't get any extra PAID time off.
If people with children were taking time off (leaving early, coming in late, days off, etc) that they were being DOCKED for, then it might not be such an issue.
On top of that, the expectation that any extra work (for holidays, etc) should go to those without children is also the issue. A holiday is NO less important to a person without children than it is to those with children. Yes, children look forward to certain holidays and ideally all parents want to be with their kids for them, but those without children have families and priorities too.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:37 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: work issues for those without children
I'm not trying to start a war here.
I get what you're saying - you weren't looking for answers - just wondering if other childless people experienced what you experienced.
I don't.
I don't need the same flexibility that people with kids have. I don't have to worry if someone's sick, or school's closed, or if a kindergarten graduation is on a Monday at 2pm and I find out the week before.
I usually only have things that are planned in advance. I'm hoping that the Father's Day example you gave is rare, which I'm assuming it's not.
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| Posted 6/29/09 2:59 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Jenn627
I usually only have things that are planned in advance.
My Father's Day was planned well in advance. I had to travel for it and made the plans months in advance. This is not a matter of planning in advance or being more efficient. No amount of planning in advance would have changed this. This is a matter of being told to cancel vacation plans to dosomeone else's work all weekend even though that someone else admittedly did not have plans... because that person has children and I don't. Maybe you have always been in a position to just say "nope, can't do it, I have plans." In my field, in this economic climate, that just isn't an option for someone wishing to stay employed.
I sometimes can be more flexible (but not always - I still have very important obligations outside of work) and have always been MORE than willing to help out where others cannot be as flexible. That doesn't mean I don't have important things in my life that I want time for. Clearly we work in very different environments. In my field, it's not as simple as putting in for the time off and planning in advance. Being held to a completely different standard just because I don't have children only complicates an already stressful and often unpredictable job.
FTR, I laughed out loud at your post about resentment. I don't resent anyone, nor am I looking to "hurt" anyone I work with. We all work very hard and we all deserve the time off we are entitled to, myself included.
I'm glad you haven't experienced the same thing -- thanks for sharing your experiences. But when you intimate that I am being immature, worrying about other people and not myself, and have a "grade school mentality," well, I'll reserve the right to respond in my own defense, especially when other parts of your post make it seem like you didn't understand or completely read my OP.
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| Posted 6/29/09 3:34 PM |
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Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Kara
Posted by anonttcer
Posted by Lisa
Guess we will never be able to post what we want on this board....maybe we can find another place that ACCEPTS childless families and we don't have to hear how we are wrong all the time....
I wonder if there is a message board out there devoted COMPLETELY to childless couples. A judgement free zone if you will...
That might be something I want to look into...
I run a horse-related message board through yuku. I've been considering starting one for childless famillies, too... but haven't gotten around to it. (FTR - this isn't a business I run or anything like that. It's a free service, and I actually PAY to run the board so we have an upgraded membership.)
There are some existing childfree/childless boards out there. I've visited a few, but they don't seem to have a strong community - more like people just popping in and out.
Kara, I'd be more than willing to help admin/mod one for us LIFers if you would like.
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| Posted 6/29/09 5:16 PM |
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TheWhiteRabbit
Thru the rabbit hole!
Member since 7/06 4412 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Wow, Kara, you are so eloquent, I'd hate to be on the other side of the court room... 
I am referring to your frustration about posting here. I post almost NOTHING here at all. IRL I am the biggest ‘mouth’ about being childfree, you would think this is my home, right?? NO WAY. Why… because parents constantly answer. YES, it’s a ‘free’ board and all, but I never post or parents and I never ‘lurk’ there, I just don’t feel I can relate to anything on there. Being childfree for a few years before you have children is not the same, in any way, as knowing (whether voluntarily or involuntarily) that you will never have children.
Sorry to ‘hijack’ in a sense, this doesn’t address your original topic, but just one of your later posts.
I think you know my job is extremely demanding and I constantly work when I am supposed to be off or on weekends, but THANKFULLY if I said to my boss “My cat is sick, I have to go…” He’s be like “GO! And is there anything I can do to help?” So I feel EXTREMELY lucky about that – because there is an equality at my firm between those with and without kids, and I LOVE that about my boss. I am so sorry you don’t have that.
I know how close you came to losing your dad and I am sure going to see him meant the world to you. I am sorry you had to cancel.
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| Posted 6/29/09 5:18 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by KittyTheStray
I am referring to your frustration about posting here. I post almost NOTHING here at all. IRL I am the biggest ‘mouth’ about being childfree, you would think this is my home, right?? NO WAY. Why… because parents constantly answer. YES, it’s a ‘free’ board and all, but I never post or parents and I never ‘lurk’ there, I just don’t feel I can relate to anything on there. Being childfree for a few years before you have children is not the same, in any way, as knowing (whether voluntarily or involuntarily) that you will never have children.
this part of your post really saddens me.....what is the worst part is that people that claim to be so open minded and "let people do what they want and live the way they want" are not very understanding that we, as childless families, need our corner of this message board.
I have been part of the LIW/LIF family for a long time but what has happened to this board and how we are treated....WITHOUT respect....makes me just want to find another place that is more understanding....
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| Posted 6/29/09 9:09 PM |
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bird382
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Member since 7/07 1712 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Kara, I'm so sorry your plans were ruined, and I'm sorry that your post about your frustration and disappointment turned all weird.
Posted by KittyTheStray
I post almost NOTHING here at all. IRL I am the biggest ‘mouth’ about being childfree, you would think this is my home, right?? NO WAY.
Same here...I'm constantly starting and then deleting responses to threads here. I don't want to (and shouldn't have to!) censor myself, but I don't have time to deal with the potential back-and-forth so I don't bother to post at all. 
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| Posted 6/29/09 10:00 PM |
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lbride
Lovin' my mini man!
Member since 3/07 2475 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: work issues for those without children
There are teachers in my building who always leave a few minutes early here and there or switch their preps so they can make it to their children's functions without taking a day. I don't even do that for doctor's appointments....
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| Posted 6/30/09 8:26 AM |
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anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!
Member since 7/06 10082 total posts
Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Lisa
Posted by KittyTheStray
I am referring to your frustration about posting here. I post almost NOTHING here at all. IRL I am the biggest ‘mouth’ about being childfree, you would think this is my home, right?? NO WAY. Why… because parents constantly answer. YES, it’s a ‘free’ board and all, but I never post or parents and I never ‘lurk’ there, I just don’t feel I can relate to anything on there. Being childfree for a few years before you have children is not the same, in any way, as knowing (whether voluntarily or involuntarily) that you will never have children.
this part of your post really saddens me.....what is the worst part is that people that claim to be so open minded and "let people do what they want and live the way they want" are not very understanding that we, as childless families, need our corner of this message board.
I have been part of the LIW/LIF family for a long time but what has happened to this board and how we are treated....WITHOUT respect....makes me just want to find another place that is more understanding....
I agree- and that is why I was inquiring about whether or not ther is a message board JUST for child free people. So we wouldn't have to worry about being judged by lurkers...
However, I dont' give a rats azz what anyone thinks of my opinion and I will continue to state it and if it riles lurkers up, more the better!
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| Posted 6/30/09 9:14 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by KittyTheStray
I know how close you came to losing your dad and I am sure going to see him meant the world to you. I am sorry you had to cancel.
Kara, you always "get it" 
Message edited 6/30/2009 9:32:08 AM.
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| Posted 6/30/09 9:28 AM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
I am ignoring those who just don't get it and feel the need to make others feel bad about VERY VALID discrimination concerns! 
anyhow...
again today... a co-worker comes in almost an hour late with her 5 yr old, says she has to take her to the Doc in 15 minutes. logs into her computer, then leaves to go to the Doc and comes back an hour later.
then leaves 1.5 hrs early, to go to her own Doctor for allergy shots.
Message edited 6/30/2009 7:16:15 PM.
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| Posted 6/30/09 7:14 PM |
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deedee1013
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/07 616 total posts
Name:
Diane
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am ignoring those who just don't get it and feel the need to make others feel bad about VERY VALID discrimination concerns!
anyhow...
again today... a co-worker comes in almost an hour late with her 5 yr old, says she has to take her to the Doc in 15 minutes. logs into her computer, then leaves to go to the Doc and comes back an hour later.
then leaves 1.5 hrs early, to go to her own Doctor for allergy shots.
Could a childless person do the same thing for their cat...if they had to take them to the Vet?
Just wondering....
I have a few cats....
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| Posted 7/1/09 8:21 AM |
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anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!
Member since 7/06 10082 total posts
Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am ignoring those who just don't get it and feel the need to make others feel bad about VERY VALID discrimination concerns!
anyhow...
again today... a co-worker comes in almost an hour late with her 5 yr old, says she has to take her to the Doc in 15 minutes. logs into her computer, then leaves to go to the Doc and comes back an hour later.
then leaves 1.5 hrs early, to go to her own Doctor for allergy shots.
That person sounds like a real winner- child or not!!
I don't get it- I make my Dr and Dentist appts for after work hours.
It sometimes takes me MONTHS to get a dental appt for a cleaning/checkup because I need a Saturday.
But guess what? I work and I won't come in late/leave early etc for a routine appt. I just think it's wrong.
I don't like getting up early on a Saturday or wasting an hour of my Saturday in the dentist but that's life when you work full time!
It stinks but life isn't a bowl of cherries!!!
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| Posted 7/1/09 10:46 AM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by deedee1013
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am ignoring those who just don't get it and feel the need to make others feel bad about VERY VALID discrimination concerns!
anyhow...
again today... a co-worker comes in almost an hour late with her 5 yr old, says she has to take her to the Doc in 15 minutes. logs into her computer, then leaves to go to the Doc and comes back an hour later.
then leaves 1.5 hrs early, to go to her own Doctor for allergy shots.
Could a childless person do the same thing for their cat...if they had to take them to the Vet?
Just wondering....
I have a few cats....
I suppose they could. but this said co-worker has never worked a full week. there are always a few days every week that she needs to leave early or come in later - for one reason or another, always involving her kids.
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| Posted 7/1/09 6:12 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by anonttcer
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am ignoring those who just don't get it and feel the need to make others feel bad about VERY VALID discrimination concerns!
anyhow...
again today... a co-worker comes in almost an hour late with her 5 yr old, says she has to take her to the Doc in 15 minutes. logs into her computer, then leaves to go to the Doc and comes back an hour later.
then leaves 1.5 hrs early, to go to her own Doctor for allergy shots.
That person sounds like a real winner- child or not!!
I don't get it- I make my Dr and Dentist appts for after work hours.
It sometimes takes me MONTHS to get a dental appt for a cleaning/checkup because I need a Saturday.
But guess what? I work and I won't come in late/leave early etc for a routine appt. I just think it's wrong.
I don't like getting up early on a Saturday or wasting an hour of my Saturday in the dentist but that's life when you work full time!
It stinks but life isn't a bowl of cherries!!!
same here. all my Doc appts are either after work or on Saturdays.
on a very RARE occasion that I need to see a specialist (they never have hours outside of 9-4 M-F), I will come in late. I did this once in a year and a half when I went to an ENT.
eta: I have 2 Doc appts next week, while I am on vacation.
Message edited 7/1/2009 6:15:15 PM.
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| Posted 7/1/09 6:14 PM |
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DirtyBlonde
*****
Member since 11/07 7344 total posts
Name:
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by Kara
Posted by GoldenRod
Just to be fair, I'm pretty sure that all of us with DC did spend some time childless... 
We are all aware of that, but honestly that argument just doesn't fly with me for several reasons, not all of which I care to get into. Your aren't childless now. I don't post on the newlyweds board because I used to be a newlywed. I assume if they want advice from someone who has been married longer, they'd post on Relationships or NFR. If I want to have a discussion with childless people and ask for that specifically on the childless families board, then I think we all know I'm talking about people who are currently childless. Additionally, that argument comes off as condescending and patronizing sometimes, whether you mean it that way or not. It comes off a lot of the time as "well, we used to be childless, so even though we're wiser now that we have kids, we certainly know what you're going through. We just have a much broader perspective now." If I wanted that broader perspective, I wouldn't post on the CF board and ask the question specifically of childless posters.
This board was created separate and apart from NFR, Relationships, Parenting, etc. for a reason -- for childless families to have a place to post. Certainly anyone is free to post on any board they want -- but you have to understand that parents posting on the CF board, on a thread where someone is specifically asking a question of childless posters are going to get some eye rolls from us childless posters. Maybe you really don't understand why it's so important to us to sometimes be able to relate only to each other -- but that in and of itself should be illustrative of some of the fundamental differences between parents and us non-parents. Honestly, sometimes we just want to be able to relate just to each other, as childless individuals, and it's becoming increasing clear that we cannot do that on this board. Even when someone expressly asks for opinions of childless people on a thread, that isn't respected. This board is not and never has been respected as a place for childless families to post, even when someone expressly asks for the opinions of childless people.
This is why I stopped posting anything of substance on this board a while back. Posting anything of substance here continues to be an exercise in frustration. I thought this stuff had died down, but apparently it hasn't. I'm just not going to waste my time anymore, seeing as no one seems to respect when childless posters only want to have a discussion amongst ourselves. I guess next time, I'll just keep it to FM.
And yes, you can all post wherever you want and justify it however you want... but the fact of the matter remains that this is a continuing frustration for a lot of us childless posters. I just do not get why, no matter who asks, no matter what the topic, we just cannot seem to have our own little corner of this board to relate to each other - or even one THREAD. I post enough on NFR and Relationships and other boards that, if I wanted a broader perspective, I'd post there.
This was me giving this board another shot now that the drama over its inception has died down... It's seriously starting to look like a lot of parents on this board just do not want a childless families board here or at least don't want us to think we can post freely here and relate only to one another.
I'll be sticking to only the "weekend plans" and "getting to know ___" posts on this board from now on.
Thank you for taking the time to write this. I know it veers off topic from your original post but someone had to say this.
You very eloquently stated the reasons why many people stay away from this board despite their desire to post.
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| Posted 7/2/09 8:29 PM |
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eddiesmommy
best buds!
Member since 5/09 11524 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
oh boy! if my co-worker had said that to me, there would have been an HR issue!  my fist would have met her eye. how DARE she say that to you??
and I also want to add that I would certainly not agree to work on Father's Day and tell my Dad "sorry, I won't be seeing you today b/c of my selfish co-workers"
NOT happening!
I was JUST complaining about this double standard to my friend yesterday. I work in a group with all woman, everyone including the boss has kids except for me.
now I don't have to pick up anyone's "slack" like you do, but I think it is completely unfair that my co-workers all have arrangements with the boss and they basically come and go as they please. they come in late, take hours for lunch, leave early - and at least one of them does this every single DAY! they have to put their kids on a bus, or go meet the teacher, or go to a school function, or take them to a lacrosse game, or take one to gymnastics, and get this one... one of them left yesterday for an hour and missed the CEO's monthly company meeting so that she could pick up her 18 year old son at home and drive him to the gym!!!!!!!   I really can't believe my boss was okay with that. Tell your spoiled brat to take a bus, taxi or ride a bike.
As a FT working mom with I seriously am insulted by the implication that this woman coworker is "selfish". Being a parent is the most selfless job you will ever do.
As for not getting the same amount of flexibility. I do not agree, and I didnt when I didnt have a DC. Yes it sucks to miss family events, graduations, etc. But its different witha child at home. They are not self sufficient human beings, they sometimes need their parents with them. If a DC is sick and needs to go to the Dr a parent MUST take them bc only guardians can make medical decisions or whatnot on their childs behalf. Going to a graduation party, is not the same as taking time to be with your own child. Not that one is more important than the other, thats not what its about, its a matter of necessity. I totally sympathized when I was a childless working woman, and do so even more now. Even when I was childless, I didnt expect to be let off for a cousins party or whatnot. Thats a want not a need....a child at home with a fever or whatever NEEDS to be taken care of. And believe me, some of us would rather be at work than home being thrown up on.
ETA: for those who end up picking up a coworkers slack, or work with habitual and frequent offenders. I totally see the validity in your posts, totally get the frustration and see your point. Its the outright hatred and nastiness spoken by a few that has riled me up.
Message edited 7/5/2009 11:12:28 PM.
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| Posted 7/5/09 10:51 PM |
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eddiesmommy
best buds!
Member since 5/09 11524 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: work issues for those without children
Posted by eddiesmommy
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
oh boy! if my co-worker had said that to me, there would have been an HR issue! my fist would have met her eye. how DARE she say that to you??
and I also want to add that I would certainly not agree to work on Father's Day and tell my Dad "sorry, I won't be seeing you today b/c of my selfish co-workers"
NOT happening!
I was JUST complaining about this double standard to my friend yesterday. I work in a group with all woman, everyone including the boss has kids except for me.
now I don't have to pick up anyone's "slack" like you do, but I think it is completely unfair that my co-workers all have arrangements with the boss and they basically come and go as they please. they come in late, take hours for lunch, leave early - and at least one of them does this every single DAY! they have to put their kids on a bus, or go meet the teacher, or go to a school function, or take them to a lacrosse game, or take one to gymnastics, and get this one... one of them left yesterday for an hour and missed the CEO's monthly company meeting so that she could pick up her 18 year old son at home and drive him to the gym!!!!!!! I really can't believe my boss was okay with that. Tell your spoiled brat to take a bus, taxi or ride a bike.
As a FT working mom with I seriously am insulted by the implication that this woman coworker is "selfish". Being a parent is the most selfless job you will ever do.
As for not getting the same amount of flexibility. I do not agree, and I didnt when I didnt have a DC. Yes it sucks to miss family events, graduations, etc. But its different witha child at home. They are not self sufficient human beings, they sometimes need their parents with them. If a DC is sick and needs to go to the Dr a parent MUST take them bc only guardians can make medical decisions or whatnot on their childs behalf. Going to a graduation party, is not the same as taking time to be with your own child. Not that one is more important than the other, thats not what its about, its a matter of necessity. I totally sympathized when I was a childless working woman, and do so even more now. Even when I was childless, I didnt expect to be let off for a cousins party or whatnot. Thats a want not a need....a child at home with a fever or whatever NEEDS to be taken care of. And believe me, some of us would rather be at work than home being thrown up on.
Oh and yes, in the world we live in, its a much better idea to let your dc ride around themselves in public transportation.....how dare you consider a child spoiled bc their parents choose not to let them run amok around the neighborhood and choose to make sure they get to their destination safely instead.
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| Posted 7/5/09 10:54 PM |
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eddiesmommy
best buds!
Member since 5/09 11524 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: work issues for those without children
removing this response bc I wrote before thinking.
Message edited 7/5/2009 11:35:12 PM.
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| Posted 7/5/09 11:01 PM |
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