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Would this offend you?

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nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Would this offend you?

My DS bday party is in a couple of weeks. We will be having the Fun Bus come to the house, then pizza and cake- about an hour and a half total time. My friend called to RSVP and said she's going to nap her son about an hour before my party starts and then they'll come over. She said they'll probably miss the bus altogether. This is one of my best friends, they were my tenants for 7 years! I feel like they should be here for the whole party. Now don't get me wrong, I was a stickler for my DS nap schedule too, but always made exceptions for family or close friends' functions. The party doesn't last that long, he can easily nap after.

Posted 2/20/13 7:54 AM
 
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summerBaby10
let's be nice

Member since 9/07

10208 total posts

Name:
Wifey

Re: Would this offend you?

I don't know- I can see both sides. If her child is able to miss a nap & not have a meltdown, she should definitely be at your entire party. A friend of mine had a 1st bday party for her son recently, which was the exact 3 hours of my son's nap. I skipped his nap (putting him down before of after would not have worked) & he was a complete & total disaster. The crowd was too much, it was too loud & crazy & with no nap, made him uncontrolable & he is usally calm. I had to leave & take him home before they even cut the cake.

Posted 2/20/13 8:11 AM
 

Hofstra26
Love to Bake!

Member since 7/06

27915 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

I understand you wanting her there but I also very much understand a parent who doesn't want their child missing a nap. My DD was like clockwork with her naps and simply couldn't function without them so I get her not wanting to have him miss his nap. It's easy to say, "he can take a nap later", but that isn't always the case. I think as a fellow parent you need to be understanding, I am sure she would love to be there but sometimes you need to do what's best for your child above all else.

So no, I wouldn't be offended, I think that's the wrong word. I would be disappointed she couldn't be there but I would also be understanding. Kids change things, I hated missing things when my DD was little but sometimes it was just unavoidable. Chat Icon

Message edited 2/20/2013 8:17:41 AM.

Posted 2/20/13 8:17 AM
 

Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!

Member since 5/05

12165 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

It wouldn't offend me, but I might find it odd depending on the child's age--like if he's 3, let's say. Also, if she's one of your best friends, I'd figure she plans on hanging out well after the party ends. That would be absolutely fine with me.

Posted 2/20/13 8:18 AM
 

nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Would this offend you?

I do see both sides, but I also know her well enough, that I know his nap timed are general and not really set in stone.

Posted 2/20/13 8:18 AM
 

nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Would this offend you?

Posted by Eireann

It wouldn't offend me, but I might find it odd depending on the child's age--like if he's 3, let's say. Also, if she's one of your best friends, I'd figure she plans on hanging out well after the party ends. That would be absolutely fine with me.



No, we actually have something to do later that day, so we will not be hosting much past the party time.

Posted 2/20/13 8:19 AM
 

summerBaby10
let's be nice

Member since 9/07

10208 total posts

Name:
Wifey

Re: Would this offend you?

Posted by Eireann

It wouldn't offend me, but I might find it odd depending on the child's age--like if he's 3, let's say. Also, if she's one of your best friends, I'd figure she plans on hanging out well after the party ends. That would be absolutely fine with me.



Chat Icon my child just turned 3 & I wrote about our situation above at a friend's party. Some kids just need a nap, some don't.

Posted 2/20/13 8:20 AM
 

Hofstra26
Love to Bake!

Member since 7/06

27915 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

Posted by nferrandi

I do see both sides, but I also know her well enough, that I know his nap timed are general and not really set in stone.



Then that changes things a little IMO. If he does have a flexible nap time then I see wanting her to make an exception so they don't miss the party.

When my DD was young her naps were set in stone, lol. She would literally shut down and pass out at 12:30 on the nose and sleep solid for three hours straight. There was no messing with her. Chat Icon But if your friends son isn't like that and can easily nap whenever, then yes, she should make an effort to not miss the party.

Posted 2/20/13 8:30 AM
 

MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *

Member since 2/09

6243 total posts

Name:
Gina

Re: Would this offend you?

I wouldn't be offended. I know if that was me, and my dd tried to make the party without a nap, she'd be unbearable and I totally wouldn't get to enjoy myself. I wouldn't take it personal.

Posted 2/20/13 8:38 AM
 

alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!

Member since 5/09

18388 total posts

Name:
Allison

Would this offend you?

I wouldn't be offended. People miss parties... Such is life.

Posted 2/20/13 8:48 AM
 

jlk51496
Mom of 3 - YIKES! =)

Member since 10/09

6758 total posts

Name:
Katie

Re: Would this offend you?

i would be a little annoyed...I can't see naps dictating my life...I never got it..I had great nappers BUT we would never miss something bec of a nap...either they go in earlier, it is shortened a little, or they nap after the party...(which is usally what I pick bec they are so tired after a fn-filled party!) IT's one day - tomorrow naps can be back to routine! Chat Icon

Posted 2/20/13 8:55 AM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54921 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Would this offend you?

I wouldn't be offended at all.
But very little offends me.

Posted 2/20/13 8:57 AM
 

CrankyPants
I'm cranky

Member since 7/06

18178 total posts

Name:
Mama Cranky

Re: Would this offend you?

When I had DD1, I would have been offended. She was a flexible napper and I never understood people tied to the nap schedule.

Then I had DS and he changed everything. He needed his nap or he was a mess and no one, me, him , the party hosts would have a good time without him napping. I could move his nap earlier or later by about an hour but that was really it. For important events I would try to get him up earlier so he would be ready for a nap sooner, but there is only so much of that you can do when the kid wakes up at 6:30 to begin with.

Thank goodness DD2 is a flexible napper like her big sis.

Posted 2/20/13 9:08 AM
 

TyReseGreen
Lil Prince is here

Member since 8/11

6338 total posts

Name:
Theresa

Would this offend you?

I wouldn't be upset if it was me! DD has missed close friends parties as recent as 2 weeks ago she was coming down with a cold. I had previously RSVP but I wasn't going to let her go. I did give him his gift though.

Posted 2/20/13 9:08 AM
 

Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

Name:
Momx100

Re: Would this offend you?

How old is her child and what time is your party?

If her child was under 3, I would totally understand as a cranky toddler is no fun for anyone.

I might be a little offended if her child is over 3. Many 3-4 year olds still nap but they can handle an hour of play.

DS#2 has a party at 2:30 this weekend, smack in the middle of his nap time. I regret saying yes. At the same time, I don't want to email the host and say that we can't go because it is naptime. Sounds like such a lame excuse.

Posted 2/20/13 9:56 AM
 

SandL
LIF Adolescent

Member since 4/12

541 total posts

Name:
L

Re: Would this offend you?

Nope, I wouldn't get offended at all.

Posted 2/20/13 10:01 AM
 

cantwait84
LIF Infant

Member since 5/08

106 total posts

Name:

Would this offend you?

Nope, would not be offended at all.

Posted 2/20/13 10:06 AM
 

nycgirl
Angels!

Member since 3/09

7721 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

She was honest, and is still making the effort to go... Knowing that she will likely miss the best part of the party.

Have a friend whose own kid missed the majority of her birthday due to a nap. To each their own. Don't let it ruin your friendship.

Posted 2/20/13 10:06 AM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: Would this offend you?

Although I would not be offended, I'd prob wonder why she just doesn't show up when the good part starts since her kid doesn't have a set nap time, you know? I know where you're coming from, its one of those things where you're thinking "ok...you're coming but missing the main part for really no reason?".

It would confuse me too but I would just concentrate on the party and those that will be there and not worry about them too much. At least she's coming..I would have been offended if she missed the whole thing because of a nap.

Posted 2/20/13 10:11 AM
 

Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!

Member since 8/05

14470 total posts

Name:
Veronica

Re: Would this offend you?

AJ never had a 'set' time but a general bracket in the day. Up to 4hours in length of when she'd FINALLY nap.

She was an absolute terror without it. I hated making her skip one, but there was no clockwork for us.

Still if it had been the same scenario and it was her party would *I* be offended.

Nope, not in the least. But that's just me.

Posted 2/20/13 10:14 AM
 

MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!

Member since 5/06

14562 total posts

Name:
Marisa

Re: Would this offend you?

It would get an Chat Icon from me - but I wouldn't hold it against her.

It really depends - is SHE the one that's the crazy 'he has to nap at this place at this time' person, or is the kid a total monster if he DOESN'T nap 'at this place at this time' ? KWIM?

I have two easy going kids - so for me it's not an issue if they nap later on, they fall asleep anywhere - but I know people who's kids are just misery if they don't nap on their schedule, even if they ARE at a brithday party.

Posted 2/20/13 10:25 AM
 

headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: Would this offend you?

Would not offend me in the least. It's not taking away from *MY* DS's party to not have a friend there. It's about my kid, not anyone else's. I'll be honest, I'm not sure what there is to be offended about.

Posted 2/20/13 10:26 AM
 

Lara&Aidansmommy
For mom i miss u ETC ILOVEU

Member since 3/07

13921 total posts

Name:
ETC I LOVE YOU

Re: Would this offend you?

Posted by headoverheels

Would not offend me in the least. It's not taking away from *MY* DS's party to not have a friend there. It's about my kid, not anyone else's. I'll be honest, I'm not sure what there is to be offended about.



ita..she is still coming just missing some of the party. Ive had friends show up late with their kids for many of my parties. Honestly never even missed they werent there.Chat Icon Like Headoverheels said its about YOUR child no one else. Chat Icon

Posted 2/20/13 10:30 AM
 

sleepie76
enjoying every minute

Member since 12/07

3881 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

What time is the party ?


My kids nap from 12-2ish. A party at 1 or 2 is a nightmare for me.

My daughter can hang, my son cant.


I show up to these parties a little late & let him nap.

Otherwise, this would be the afternoon :

He falls asleep on the way there. I wake him. He's cranky and sleepy, not really into the party atmosphere. Eventually comes around and I can detach him from my side. Drive home, falls asleep again. Wakes up cranky for the rest of the night.
He's not enjoying the party & neither am I.

Posted 2/20/13 10:38 AM
 

2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

6791 total posts

Name:

Re: Would this offend you?

Not at all.

Posted 2/20/13 10:44 AM
 
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